I’m smashed between a couple of giggling girls and a massive guy in a dark hallway; we’re all waiting for the bathroom. Lucy is going to kill me. I keep thinking about the note I taped to the inside of the front door. Lucy always puts the chain on when she gets home, so she won’t miss it. I said I was invited to a party but I didn’t tell her who I was with or where I was going. She shouldn’t object to this. She wanted normal. I’m giving her normal. I mean, this is normal right? I look at the girls in front of me; they look normal. The guy looks, uh, huge. He catches me eyeing him and smiles. I look past him, down the hall like I’m looking for someone. I don’t know anyone here except Nick. I don’t even have to use the bathroom. I just felt overwhelmed walking into a house full of strangers wondering who the hell I am and how I ended up on the arm of Nick Marino. I’m still trying to figure that out myself.

The bathroom door swings open and Matt walks out.

Matt.

Something inside me lights up at the sight of him. Maybe it’s just the idea that I know someone besides Nick. He stumbles down the hall and disappears into the living room before I even have a chance to call his name. He didn’t look like he was up for small talk. He wasn’t all that pleasant when I saw him earlier. He looks even worse now.

After I use the bathroom I walk back to the living room to find Nick. I really don’t want to jump back into his spotlight, but he’s the reason I’m here. The only reason.

“Hey, there you are.” Nick pulls me into his arms and kisses my forehead. “This is Dani.” Nick is beaming at me as if I’m the source of his light. I really do have him fooled.

“I’m K, welcome to my home.” K shakes my hand. “Can I get you a drink?”

“Nah, she doesn’t drink.” Nick winks at me.

“I don’t?” Do I look like the kind of girl that doesn’t drink? How pathetic.

Nick looks flustered. “I guess…I just…you didn’t want a beer at the bonfire, so I just thought you didn’t drink.”

Yeah, I declined a beer at the bonfire earlier, only because I wasn’t sure one of the girls hadn’t spiked it with poison. “I don’t drink beer,” I smile.

Nick raises an eyebrow at me. “Alright, get my girl a drink.” He puts his arm around me and pulls me close. He seems happy to learn I’m not a non-drinking geek. I just hope he doesn’t expect me to do shots or something. I’ve had alcohol—a glass of champagne on New Year’s Eve, a sip of my mother’s wine at a fancy restaurant. I’ve just never drank socially. I’ve never done anything socially, like go to a house party or a bonfire.

K disappears to get me a drink that isn’t beer, and a group of guys bombard Nick. I know one of them. Nick shakes his hand then turns to introduce me. The way he does it feels like something formal. Like he’s announcing I’m taken. It’s sort of possessive, but it makes me feel special. “Dani, this is my boy, Arnie.”

Arnie licks his lips and looks me up and down, like he’s trying to place me. He is disgusting.

“We have English together,” I remind him so he can stop staring. I don’t offer my hand for him to shake like I did with K.

Arnie snaps his fingers and says, “That’s right. You’re the new chick.” He continues nodding his head as if he’s answering a question in his mind.

It’s annoying. He is annoying.

“Can you really consider me new? I started school in February.” I don’t know why I’m challenging him. He isn’t worth it.

“You’ll always be the new girl.” Arnie takes a gulp from his red cup and walks away.

His words sting a little, but he’s right. I will never fit in here. I don’t want to. I have a plan. I’m sticking to my plan.

This party is not in my plan.

Nick motions for me to follow him and we head out of the living room, down the hall, into a bedroom.

Whoa.

Nick closes the door behind us. My pulse races.

Nothing about this feels right.

There’s a knock on the door. Nick opens it. K hands him a cup and smiles, then closes the door.

Holy shit, what is going on?

“Sorry, Arnie can be a douche sometimes.” Nick hands me the cup and leans against a white wicker dresser with his thumbs in his front pockets.

I take the cup and sniff it. It smells like vodka and orange juice. Who knows what else is in there.

Nick wouldn’t drug me, would he?

“Why don’t you sit down?” Nick motions behind me to the bed.

He’s crazy if he thinks I’m that easy. “I think I better go.” I put the cup on the nightstand and reach for the door.

“Wait.” He steps in front of me and I jump back. I don’t know any self-defense, it’s the one class my mother never signed me up for. But I know where to kick a guy to put him down. “No, oh no!” He opens the door. “It’s not like that. I just thought we could…it’s quiet in here. I wanted to talk. That’s it. Just talk.” He tries to take my hand, but I jerk it away. The back of my legs are up against the bed. If he wanted, he could knock me down and jump on me in a matter of seconds. If he wanted to. The thought sends a shiver up my back. I’m not exactly sure if it’s the bad kind.

“I’m sorry. We can keep the door open.” Nick pushes the door until the knob hits the wall. “I won’t touch you.” He backs away from the door and walks around the bed to the other side of the room. “See, you can leave anytime you want.”

My cheeks flush. Of course Nick isn’t a rapist. I bet girls line up to sleep with him. “I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s my fault. I shouldn’t have brought you in here. It’s just loud out there, and I really want to spend time with you. Without Arnie or anyone else bothering us.”

I’m probably the only girl at this party afraid to be alone with Nick Marino. I should be grateful I’m even here. He could be in this room with a girl that wants to be ravaged by the hottest boy in school. Instead he’s stuck with me, and from the look on his face, he’s regretting it. I need to keep the façade going. I don’t want him to see the huge mistake standing across the room.

I relax my shoulders and lean against the wicker dresser like I’m cool, like I belong here. Nick is leaning against the wall on the opposite side of the room. We’re separated by the bed. Gulp.

“Whose room is this?” The bed is small, full-size at most. It’s draped with floral bedding and matching throw pillows. Beside the bed is a small white nightstand with a seashell-covered lamp. It’s the only source of light in the room.

“K’s family rents it…” Nick stops mid-sentence and takes a sip of his beer. “These units come furnished.”

“Your family owns this house?” I pick up my drink and sit on the edge of the bed. I smell it one more time and wet my lips with the contents.

“They own the block.” They he says, not we. He really does disassociate himself from it all. “Look, I hate talking about my family.” Nick sits on the other side of the bed. It’s nice to know he’s just as uncomfortable talking about family as I am. It’s another thing we have in common.

“What do you want to talk about?” I take a sip of my drink and pretend it isn’t burning my throat.

Nick runs his hand through his hair and smiles the sexiest smile I’ve ever seen. A smile that tells me the idea of being thrown on the bed and ravished by this boy is not what I’m afraid of. I’m not scared he will. I’m worried he won’t.

“Have you ever heard of thizz?”

I lean against the wall in the living room, watching the crowd. The keg is flowing, blunts are being passed. I haven’t seen Nick since the kitchen an hour ago. I wonder if he’s hooking up with someone already. Part of me wants it to be true, and part of me doesn’t. I don’t want him to hurt Dani, but my life would suck a lot less if he did. I can’t get her out of my head. The way she smelled when I hugged her. The pissed-off look on her face when I let her go. I’m a fucking idiot. She doesn’t want me, she never did.