Chapter VI

Sarah suggests a juvenile. • My indifference. • She impecunious. • My fears. • She allays them. • I consent. • Fair haired Lizzie. • “Don't call me aunt.” • Smitten. Sarah advises Lizzie. • Ad-vises me. • Sarah stroked. • Lizzie peeps. • Lewed frolics. • Stockings and boots again. • Sarah in bed with Lizzie, stockings put on and legs felt. • Garters and cunt. • A silk dress bait. • Hooked. • Pudenda exhibited. • Simultaneous masturbations and gamahuching. • My sudden letch. • Lizzie a witness.

Sometime after and in the spring, I went to Sarah's lodgings. Most of my erotic frolics there had taken place in the months in which it was dark at half past five or six. Sarah asked point blank, “Would you like another young one.” My letch for young ones was satisfied, and I said I did not care about it. — When next I saw her she reverted to the subject. If she were virgin I would not mind, I replied. Sarah would try. — Then I thought of the cost. I could only give ten pounds, and must see the young lady's cunt before I fucked her. Sarah refused angrily and the subject again dropped. — Afterwards meeting her on her beat one night, we had a chat. She spoke of the trouble of finding the proper sort of lass, and so on. — Was it not worth fifteen pounds? “Perhaps,” but she was to recollect that every time I saw those little ladies' cunts after their first fucking, I paid two sovereigns, that they cost money besides, and were very expensive.

Sarah was hard up and asked me to give her a sovereign, which I freely did, and don't recollect her ever asking me for money before. She remarked that I did not see her so much as formerly (which was true, for I kept to my home and also because I had been abroad). She missed me much, she said. A night or two after I met her, and she said she would try to get a girl for ten pounds, hoping if I was pleased I would make it more. She asked me to give her another pound. “I think I know of one — but must go to fetch her if I get her.” She refused explanation and I gave the sovereign.

A week or two passed away, and I had no women gay or strange, for it was the London season and all of us were in town. Then I met Sarah in the street, and went to a baudy house with her. “I wonder I have not seen you. I have got one, come as soon as you can and see if you'll have her. — She's a nice girl fifteen years old — quite fair, quite light haired, blue eyes, and oh! so plump.” “I can't bear fair haired girls.” Which was true. “What does the colour matter, you can't expect all you want for ten pounds, and you never said anything about colour. I am sure she is a virgin.”

“Have you been feeling and looking? You like a young girl to sleep with.” Sarah laughed, said a young girl amused her, but, “If you don't like her, give me another sovereign and she shall go back, but you won't have such a chance again, and she has neither father or mother.” At last I arranged to go, but said I hated light hair, and certainly wouldn't have her unless I saw a virginity.

Sarah was annoyed — “I've taken the trouble, but give me another pound to get rid of her.” She should know better another time. Then not caring about the girl from her description, I gave her the pound. She took it saying, “I must try to make something out of her.” — She was sulky, and would not play any lascivious pranks with me, was in a hurry, must make money, she was hard up — she always stopped three times as long with me as with any one else, she said. “Where are your silk stockings?” I asked. “Pawned.” She owed rent and couldn't starve.

Perhaps I would go and see her, I said. “The sooner the better,” — for she was not going to be fooled. In such a sulky nasty temper, I had never seen her before. I didn't like parting so, so took her into a public, and gave her grog. — There we talked about the virgin, and the subject grew more interesting to me.

I should not have such a chance again, had she not been hard up she would not have taken the trouble, but she'd known me a long time, and had never asked me for a present. — She might have expected I would have given her a flimsy now that she was in trouble, and now I only offered her ten pounds, when before I'd given her fifteen. No I shouldn't see the girl, for some-thing had just come into her head — I'd had the offer, and now some one else should. I blazed up directly I thought some other man would have her, I couldn't bear it, and said I'd have her. The more I said I would, the more she said I shouldn't. — But it ended in my promising to pay handsomely, if the girl was virgin and preposessing. “How about shewing her cunt?” Sarah would arrange. Drink would not do, for she couldn't bear the taste of spirits. “If you like her, you must not mind money. — She hasn't a rag to her back — give her clothes — I have told her friends I will get her a situation, and they think I'm married — I'll soon tell her I am a gay woman, and we will have as with Harriet baudy larks before her. I'll talk her into it. — You say you're a doctor, you act that well, and it will all come right. — She calls me her aunt, but I am not.” — “But if she gets riotous.” “She can't read or write, and doesn't know the name of my street or any part of London, what can she do? — She could only run away.” “Suppose she went to a policeman.” “I should say I'd turned her out for stealing.” Good, kind aunt. [If she were her aunt which I sometimes thought, altho I never knew.]

I was to go at the girl at once, for Sarah must get money somehow. — I was before the girl to begin with Sarah all imaginable lasciviousness. — I got so excited talking about it that I said, “I'll have her.” I'll have her, yet I didn't seem to care much about the affair. She will be no fuck worth spending money for. A little hairless cunt, tho a novelty, is not a great one to me. I hate door mat colour haired girls, and fifteen pounds will be thirty-five soon. But as I'd now given my word I would see the girl, and give Sarah three pounds and cut the affair if I didn't like her. — Thus I thought. But a little cock stiffening came on and I thought — “quite light, flaxen hair; but has she any on her motte? — it's long since I saw a very light haired virgin grummit” — and pondering on the various col- oured quim hedges I have fucked, found myself at Sarah's door the next night.

The street door was usually ajar, but on that night I had to ring — I heard a clattering of feet and the door opened. “Mrs. F**z*r within?” “Yes, sir.” There stood a girl, whom I could barely see in the faint light of a small candle, placed somewhere up the stairs. — Her feet made a row. — A clumsy country bitch, thought I, as I entered the room. But in a second, my cock stood at the sight of the maiden with the clumping boots.

She was very tall for her age, with a beautiful, light coloured hair, large bright blue eyes, and a pink fresh complexion — plump as if she had lived on the fat of the land, and with the strong healthy look which some peasant girls get on bacon and potatoes, and which a town girl of her class, fed on steaks and mutton, rarely gets. I should have guessed her turned sixteen, but for a young look in her eyes. — She wore deep black, and short petticoats, and had a perfectly modest look al-though she stared at me; turning away her eyes when mine met hers, and colouring up strongly. Well she might, for Sarah had already given her baudy instruction, had told her that I was one of the gentlemen who fucked her, but the only one that did so at her home — was a doctor and knew all about girls at sight. — A night's sleeping with Sarah, who moreover had, I expect, well tickled her little cunt for her, was enough to make the girl stare at me.

I never liked females with quite light hair on either their heads or tails. Now my first thought was, what is the colour of her cunt fringe, is it short or long, thick or thin, or is there any? — I felt in a desperate state of lewedness. “Who is this?” “A country girl who is to be my maid.” “What is her name?” “Lizzie.” “Come here and give me a kiss” — her eyes opened wide. “Give the doctor a kiss.” “I shan't.”