"He took the towels and my clothes. I stood there forever, begging him to leave or to give me something to cover myself with, but he wouldn't. He said he wanted to preview what he'd be sampling later."
She's all out crying, deep heavy sobs, and I want to go and stick a knife in Les' heart. Luna turns from me and drops onto my bed, hiding her face in my pillow. I want to hold her, tell her it's okay, but it's not, because she turned to Dex and not me. If she called, I would've been there. She has to know that. But she chose to turn to him instead.
"Did he touch you?" I ask afraid to hear the answer.
"Les? He wouldn't get out. I called my mother, but she'd gone to the store. I was alone with him. Les approached the tub. All I had between us, the only thing covering me, was the flimsy curtain. He pulled it open and looked me over. I felt dirty and cheap. I just wanted to get away from him, so I gave in and stepped out of the tub." She screws her eyes up, and let's out a cry that breaks my heart. I can't imagine how scared she was. "He grabbed my breast as I walked by and squeezed it hard. I yelled for him to get off me and pushed his hand away. He liked it, his eyes fucking sparkled. Then he slapped me on the ass, and said he couldn't wait for later.
"That's why you didn't go home?"
She nods.
"I would've helped you."
"I didn't mean for it to happen, Cooper. I was scared and Dex was there. I know him. He was warm and safe. He held me."
"I don't need the fucking details."
"Yes you do. It was fine, we were just two friends. I could talk to Dex. He knows Les and how much I hate him. Then he gave me something to relax, and the thing is, I just didn't expect . . ."
"You didn't expect?" I can't hear anymore, I explode. "How could you not? Yes he felt safe. You were in love with him. Maybe you still are."
She cries harder.
"I'm sorry, Cooper. Please give me another chance. I'm scared to go home. I don't know what to do."
"Is he done with you now? Is that the reason you came back to me? If you called me last night. I would have been glad to help you. There isn't one single thing I wouldn't have done for you, including knock the son of a bitch off. But you didn't call me. You didn't even think of me. Instead you went to Dex. Since he knows you so well and he knows how to help you, go back to him."
She wipes the tears with the back of her hands before she heads to the door and walks out. It fucking kills me, but I let her go.
Chapter 24
I don't see Luna for three days. She doesn't show her face in school, which just encourages the whispers behind my back that much more. During that time I hear plenty of shit as I walk down the halls. I assume the gossip mill is going at full strength because she cheated on me so publicly. Losers have nothing better to talk about.
At first, I don't recognize the Goth girl standing across from my locker staring at me. She's dressed all in black, from head to toe, and she cut her hair. No, cut is too nice a word. She looks like she used a hatchet to chop it off. The length is gone, except for on the right side in the front. That piece is still long, and she's using it to hide behind. The rest of it is short, uneven, and I don't know, spiked?
My heart thuds and skitters as I look into the familiar violet/ blue eyes. They're cold, emotionless. What happened to her? I wonder if she's in as much pain as I am. I haven't slept since I found out she cheated. All I do is mope around at home and fight with my mother and sister.
Beneath her left eye something catches my attention. What the hell is on her face? The three blue teardrops stand out. Is that? No, she wouldn't tattoo her face, not permanently would she?
I can't believe this is the same girl I gave my heart to. The one that less than a week ago I'd stay up talking to all night long. The amazing girl I couldn't get enough of, that could make even the most boring literature assignment come to life with fun and laughter. The one I cherished and thought was my soulmate. This can't be the same girl whose body would meld into my embrace as we sat on her roof top making out and staring at the stars, the same girl who visited my dreams each night. But it is her.
We stand frozen, neither of us speaking.
I cross the hall and stand in front of her.
"What did you do?" I ask looking her up and down. Now that I'm standing closer, I see that her skin is pink and bruised around the teardrops.
"They're for you. So you know that I'll always regret what I did. I'll cry over you until the day I die."
A tiny part of me wants to take her in my arms and kiss the pain away, but the bitter taste of betrayal lingering in my mouth is too strong. I can't get past it.
"Stop with the bullshit."
Her eyes drop down. At first I think it's because of what I said to her, but as she brings her wrist into view, I realize she's trying to show me something. Fear seizes me. What can she want me to see on her wrist? If she tried to kill herself, I don't know what I'll do. This shouldn't be the first thought that pops into my head, but it is.
My eyes look down, and I see another tattoo. This one is a single word written in dark, black script. Cooper. My heart races. I want to throw up. I don't know what the hell I'm feeling right now, anger, sadness, regret.
"I did this to show them they can take what they want from my body, but my heart will always belong to you."
She wipes a tear, a real tear from her eye.
Why does this hurt so much? She made the decision to go to the party. She chose to cheat. I should hate her, so why is love still the strongest thing I feel for Luna?
*
Friday night Noah drags me to the batting cages with him. I'm not really up to being around people, but he's not asking a million questions about Luna. And the idea of smacking something as hard as I can with a baseball bat has appeal.
Since Luna showed up to school with the tattoos it's only made the gossip worse. Now everyone assumes I hurt her. They've decided that's why she was so upset at the party. I'm the reason she sought comfort in her ex's arms, because I chose someone else over her. I don't bother clarifying. These ass wipes just aren't worth my time or energy.
It's good to get out. I hate to admit it, but I'm feeling a little better, and I think I'm ready to talk to Luna. Really talk, see if we can somehow get past this. I don't know if it's possible, but I'm not ready to rule it out completely either, because as much as I don't want to be, I'm still crazy in love with her.
I walk in the house with a smile for the first time all week, only to be surprised by the hard slap of my mother's hand across my face. My skin stings not only from the contact to my cheek, but from her nails dragging across and scratching my skin.
My hand covers the spot she hit. "What the fuck was that for?"
"Don't you dare talk to me like that!" She slaps the back of my head. "I thought I raised you to be better than this."
I hold my arms up defending my face in case she decides to get another strike in.
"Mom, stop!" I shout, still clueless about what brought on this onslaught.
"I can't believe you'd knock that girl up and then break her heart."
"What!? I don't know what you're talking about."
"Don't play dumb with me. She was here. She told me everything."
"Who Luna?"
"Who else is there? How many girls are you having sex with?"
"No one. Just her. I mean it only happened once."