Chapter 21

"Okay, but aside from the comment to Marlena, I didn't do anything," I plead my case to Noah on the ride home.

"Dude, you have some serious ass kissing to do."

"But I didn't do a fucking thing."

"Doesn't matter. She's not listening. Can you blame her?"

I shake my head. Yes, I can fucking blame her because all I've ever done as far as Selene is concerned is try to do the right thing, the responsible thing. But it's never been good enough for her. Nothing I ever do is good enough. For anyone.

I'm realizing that's the problem I'll never be enough, whether it's her or my mother, or anyone else. They'll always see what they want. All they see in me is the player, the liar. I thought, I hoped Selene sees the man. The man with a beating heart and feelings. I'm hurt because I let her see me vulnerable and broken back in Italy, but it still doesn't matter.

We drive the next thirty minutes back to my place in silence. I think Noah understands I'm at my breaking point. It's pissing me off to no extent that Selene won't talk to me and that my sister is not only driving her home, but siding with her as well. Never mind that Troy and Marlena made it perfectly clear after today if they never see me again it will be too soon. That's fine. I've had it with them as well.

Lexi meets us in the parking garage when we arrive at the building. Seems we're the last car to arrive. Troy and Marlena not only got here first, they're already done unpacking the car and are on their way home. I wonder if Noah drove like my grandmother on purpose so Troy and I wouldn't go at it any further. It doesn't fucking matter, I don't give a fuck about Troy, or Marlena right now. The only one I care about is Selene.

I grab one of the heavy boxes from Noah's trunk and shoot my sister a dirty look as I walk past her. She doesn't say anything, and I'm wondering if Noah's given her some sort of signal to back off. I don't bother waiting for them, I get into the empty elevator and head up to my apartment by myself, wondering what I'm going to find when I get up there.

The door to the apartment is unlocked. I trudge into the spare room and set the unassembled cradle down on the ground. I feel a twisting in my stomach as I approach the closed door to my bedroom. I clench and unclench my fists, then stretch my neck from side to side, hoping to calm myself before I go in there. With my hand on the knob I take a few breaths, until I think I've pulled myself together. I open the door and step inside to find Selene packing her clothes in a suitcase. I know I can't hold it together any longer.

"What do you think you're doing?"

"What does it look like? I'm packing."

Three steps is all it takes for me to step in front of her, grab the suitcase and fling it into the corner, spilling all of its contents onto the floor. Selene jerks away from me as she gasps and covers her mouth with her hand.

"No. You're not. You're not going anywhere."

"Cooper, you don't want me. Just let me go."

I close in on her, hoping the combination of my height and my anger will intimidate her into backing down. "You're blowing this all out of proportion. I didn't do anything."

"Hey, coop.” Noah peeks his head into the room. “We're going to get out of here. We'll finish unpacking the car later."

I nod, keeping laser like focus on Selene.

Her phone vibrates against her night table. I dart around her and grab it before she can. Just as I thought, Mateo.

I answer it, hoping to get rid of this fucker once and for all.

"Hey, Matt. Selene can't come to the phone right now. We're in the middle of something."

"Just put her on. I know she's leaving you."

My eyes seer into hers. He crossed a line, and it's her fault, she led him there. "Sorry for the confusion," I say with a bitter edge. "Selene isn't going anywhere. Tell him, baby. Tell your friend," I say the word with special emphasis, "that you're not going anywhere."

I put the phone on speaker and hold it against her cheek.

"I'll call you later," she says sounding beaten down and defeated.

"I don't like the way you sound. I'll be there in fifteen minutes.

I shake my head, signaling she needs to do better, and the way I'm pinning her down with my stare let's her know I mean business. Since she's not looking to say anything further, I do.

"See, Matty, like I said, she isn't going anywhere. Now leave her alone so that we can work things out."

"You hurt her and you're going to have to answer to me."

"Oh yeah tough guy?" I pull the phone away from her and bring it up to my ear, adrenaline pumps through my veins as my body tenses, and prepares to fight. I turn from Selene because the anger racing through my veins now feels overpowering and I don't need her to see it and back away further. "Why don't you come here right now so I can kick your fucking ass? Huh? You want to be the hero? Come on, I dare you, be the fucking hero."

Selene grabs the phone from behind me and pries it out of my hand. "I'm okay. I'll call you later. I promise."

"Selene . . ." I hear the warning in his voice, and I can't help but respond.

"She said she's fine, dick head."

"You're a real tough guy. Let's see if you're still this tough the next time I see you."

"I'll call you back," Selene says before things escalate any further and hangs up.

She throws her phone on the bed and holds her head in her hands, letting the tears stream down again.

My first instinct is to pull her into my arms and kiss her until she's better; until we're better. But I don't. I can't. I'm not just angry at how she reacted at the restaurant, I'm seething that once again she's turning away from me and turning to this guy that she supposedly doesn't have romantic feelings for.

I sit on the bed and scrub my hands over my face. "This isn't working out is it?"

"Really? What clued you in? The fact that you're so fucking desperate to be the playboy that you have to show your friends a video you made with some dumb slut during my baby shower?"

I jump to my feet and get in her face.

"Maybe if you gave me a chance to explain you'd know it isn't a video I made. I don't even know her."

"I heard her calling your name."

"That's right, Selene. She knew my name. She also knew about Anything Goes, that's what the stupid video was about in the first place. She wants on the show. She must have seen a picture or advertisement with me in it, and thought I could help her, I don't really know. Girls want me. That shouldn't surprise you. You knew that since we first got together. So I don't understand the FUCKING PROBLEM!"

She sucks a breath in fighting back a fresh wave of tears.

"Did it turn you on?"

"You're kidding me, right?"

She sniffles and shakes her head. "No. I'm not. I want to know. When you were watching, did you want to fuck her?"

"So now I'm not allowed to be attracted to other women. I'm not allowed to fantasize?"

"Just answer the question."

"Fine. Yes. I watched and I wanted to fuck her. I wished for a moment, that she was in front of me. And if she was, I would've been tempted. That's right. I would've been. But in the end I wouldn't have touched her. You want to know why? Because I love you." At least I thought I did. Right now I'm not so sure.

I need to punch something. I hope Mateo does show up so I can pound his face and relieve some of this tension. She's standing in front of me with her shoulders slumped, looking down at her feet. She's wounded, so I continue on the offensive battering away at her.