“So is this you just walking away after we’ve fucked, after I declared my feelings for you? Do you just want to end it?” he asked as I watched his jaw noticeably tick.

The hole in my chest vibrated. If I were smart, I would have ended this. Right then. If he had any will power, he should have gotten up and run. We were a combustible pair. I was going to hurt him badly. I knew it. I felt it in my heart. That’s how I knew I had feelings for the prick, because I cared enough about sparing him pain. Despite the fabulous sex and the largest cock I’d ever had the honor to blow. This could go nowhere. My brain was saying cut him loose, but my libido chose the alternative. “I still want us to be friends.”

He shook his head violently. “Are you insane? I suppose that’s a stupid question, because I know you’ve clearly lost your mind. Weezie, we just fucked—many times. You had my cock in your mouth twice. We are so not in the goddamn friend zone,” he said as he frowned. “My offer still remains. I love you. That isn’t going to change just because you don’t want it. You’re right. I do know who you are and what your appetites entail. I knew all about the way you were before I came into this relationship. We can negotiate terms if that’s what you want, but they will be the same as before. I’m not asking for fidelity. Do what you must. But absolutely no intercourse. I have to draw the line at that. And I don’t want to know. Don’t confess to me. Just let me feign blissful ignorance and pretend you feel a thread of love for me.” He stood as he swept his fingers through his hair.

Exactly how does one get a world famous male model to look the other way while she engages in sexual acts? “We can’t be in a relationship if I’m with other men, Kee.”

He rolled his eyes as his hand paused over the blond scruff on his chin. “How is that any different than before? I gave you fucking permission, so do what you must… since I’m obviously not enough,” he whispered as sad blue eyes gave me a brittle look.

I’d never felt guilty or ashamed, but for some reason, those emotions had saddled themselves on me. I needed to add selfish too, because I didn’t want to lose him. I wanted to be able to be with whomever I chose orally… but fuck Keenan. He was willing to share me with others if I saved the most carnal for him.

“This is wrong, Kee. This is fucked up. How can you be okay with this?”

He pinned me down with his body and mumbled a response. “I’m anything but okay with this. The thought of you with another man enrages me. But I would rather have the most intimate part of you than nothing. I guess we’ll see if I’m really the actor they’re hoping for when they turn Blood Vestige into a film franchise.”

I pressed my body into his as I lay my damp hair against his shirted chest. “You’re going to be an actor? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I never got the chance. We were otherwise occupied, and I didn’t want to sully the moment. I wanted our first time to be about us—about you. I won’t give you up, Weezie, so if you puffing on other men’s cocks is a ploy or a test, I won’t fail. I am in this for the long haul no matter what I have to do.” He kissed me on top of my head as he pulled away. “I have to go.”

“But it’s Sunday,” I said with a pout.

He grimaced as he began toeing on his shoes. “I need some alone time. I’m going surfing. I need you to consider what I’ve proposed. I’ll call you later.”

With those words, he left.

I needed someone to talk to. Someone nonjudgmental. There was no way I could confide in Haven. Shit. I couldn’t call her and tell her this. She would have a coronary or have me committed. Worse, she would divulge to Latch. The truth was I didn’t have many friends that were female. Ninety percent of my acquaintances were male. And frankly, I wasn’t even sure how this arrangement would sit with them.

I’d call Brandi.

She’d started all this with one fucking piece of fruit. Damn that banana. We had kept in touch off and on, but I hadn’t been in contact with her in over a year. I grabbed my cell off the nightstand and went through my contact list. There she was. I called and got her voicemail, so I left a message. I stomped around my condo, still smelling Keenan. He was in the kitchen and on the sofa. I brought my bed pillow to my nose, and his scent was on it too. Dammit, he was creating a sentimental monster. Big cock aside, he was just another gorgeous man. I’d had them before. Not like that you haven’t.

My phone buzzed several hours later. Caller ID showed Brandi. Thank God.

“Well, well, well, so how goes it, Hollywood?” Brandi crooned into the phone.

“Hot and dirty, and that’s just the men.” I chuckled.

“Jesus, Weezie, I haven’t heard from you in a while. Umm… yeah, just about the time you started dating that hot-as-hell piece of ass man-child Keenan Stone.”

I snickered as I flopped down on my bed. “It’s only an eleven-year age difference, and we aren’t dating, per say.”

“Okay, not what I read in the magazines—what are they calling you two, Kiwi? But tell me honestly you’ve at least banged him or blown him into oblivion.”

Brandi had no idea how much truth there was in what she said. However, he was the one that had catapulted me to oblivion when he revealed his true feelings. Then again when he negotiated the terms of our future. “Don’t believe everything you read in the tabloids. Ninety percent is bullshit, especially this ‘Kiwi’ business. Named after a fucking fruit. Kill me now,” I sighed. “I do have a problem, though, and I know I don’t have to ask you this, but I need you to be discrete and not repeat this. I’m trusting you.”

“Of course. We are in the plating sisterhood.”

I laughed as I leaned back into my pillow. “Going old school, are we? Plating. Really? Just can’t get you to say cock sucking, huh?”

“Oh God, no. I kind of like the word plating. Men have no idea what the hell it is, and by the time they figure it out, well, let’s just say their vocabulary is limited,” Brandi joked.

I spent the next thirty minutes telling her everything. I left out the fact that Keenan Stone was over nine inches. As much as I loved Brandi’s wit, I really didn’t know her anymore. It was a case of us having history, but I hadn’t actually seen her in years. Keenan would kick my ass if the tabloids heard about his big cock—my big cock. And it was mine. Even I had trouble understanding why I would want anything more. He only thought he loved me. He couldn’t stand the thought of any woman having the balls to turn him down. It must have been quite the shocker when I didn’t surrender to his charisma and become compliant. It probably irked him. But the truth was I liked my men like my food—one-of-a-kind and of the gourmet variety. Blowing Keenan was like a specialty diet. It wasn’t that he couldn’t satisfy me; it was that I didn’t want to put my eggs into one basket. I enjoyed spreading the wealth, aka my lips.

There would come a day when he would want more or he would walk away. Both would hurt me equally. I learned a long time ago that everyone leaves. People you care about are not meant to stay in your life forever.

“So what you’re saying is that sexy Englishman wants you enough that he’s given you his blessing to be with other men?”

I sighed. I hadn’t realized how distasteful it sounded until I heard it from another person. “With conditions.”

“And they are…?” Brandi asked.

“Actual fucking is off the table. Everything else is a go.”

“Anal?” she asked, snorting.

“Eww… God, Brandi, I wouldn’t even consider doing that with someone else right now.”

“Interesting. So you have crossed that threshold with the golden boy?”

“Let’s keep our conversation to the topic at hand, and it had nothing to do with asses. What do I do?”

“Fuck, Weezie, if it were me, I’d keep that hottie model as the forerunner and a few less sexy studs stashed away for a rainy day. He’s too pretty to toss back. Keep him reeled in and wound tightly.”