event. You know that everybody thought that he’d been in a fight or something. He looks awful. It’s just

embarrassing.”

“It really is my fault,” I said and looked at my dad seriously. “He’s been in a fight… with me. I punched

him in the face. I’m the one who did this to him.”

“Well I’m sure that he did something to deserve it,” my dad replied.

I was silent for a moment. I wanted to say that of course he didn’t deserve it, that I’d punched him so that

my big secret wouldn’t be revealed. But I couldn’t find the right words.

“You know Michael,” my dad said contemplating, “Sometimes I’m glad that he isn’t my real son after

all.”

At that very moment I turned around and saw David standing a few feet behind us. He must have heard

everything. My dad looked up and saw him too.

“Fuck,” he exclaimed and David dashed inside. My dad got up to follow him. I walked after the both of

them, my heart pounding like crazy. I could hear them talking in the hallway when I came inside.

“David, what I said just came out all wrong,” my dad said, “Please don’t ruin the evening for your

mom.” He looked worried.

“I’m going home dad,” David said and then he looked at me. “You and your perfect son can both go

fuck yourselves.” He put on his coat and dug up his car keys.

“I’ll see you at the office,” my dad tried but David had already left.

31. “I quit.”

On Monday, my dad and I arrived at the office late. I still had a massive headache from drinking too

much on Saturday and not getting enough sleep. When we walked in to the firm, David was already

packing his stuff. When he saw my dad come in he rushed to dad’s office and didn’t even bother to close

the door behind him.

“I quit,” I heard David say, “Here’s my letter of resignation.”

“David what on earth are you talking about?” my dad asked in shock. I waited in the hallway but I could

see David throw the envelope with the letter on my dad’s desk.

“What do you think I’m talking about? I’ve had enough of this bullshit.”

“If this is about what happened at the party… ,” my dad tried.

“Of course it’s about that!” David yelled. “It’s about you telling Michael that I deserved getting

punched in the face. You thought I deserved getting my nose broken and a hole in my skull by your perfect

son.”

“I didn’t mean that.”

“Like you didn’t mean that you were glad that I’m not your real son!”

“David please calm down,” my dad pleaded. “I had too much to drink and I was stressed out because of

the party. I wanted it to make a good impression on everyone. You know I didn’t mean it.”

“Yeah you did,” David said in an icy cold voice. “No matter how hard I’ve tried since my mom

married you, it’s never been enough. I never expected you to love me like you love Michael, but I wish

you could have been proud of me just for one day.”

“I am proud of you,” my dad said, almost begging.

“Well it’s too late for that now. I don’t want so see you or Michael for a while. Tell my mom that I

won’t be coming home.”

“David you can’t do that. Your mom is going to be so upset.”

“I’m sorry about that, but this is the way it’s going to be for a while.” He tried to walk out but my dad

got up and grabbed his arm.

“I’m really sorry David. I do love you just like you brothers and sister.” For a moment he sounded like

he meant it, but David didn’t believe him and walked out the door. I tried to stop him in the hallway.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“You heard, I just quit my job.”

“Don’t do this, you know that dad didn’t mean it. Please don’t be this mad at him,” I pleaded.

“I’m so fed up with you and dad! I don’t want to see either one of you for a while.”

“Don’t say that,” I whispered as I tried to touch his arm. He shrugged away from me. “Don’t call me, I

won’t be picking up.”

He walked out of the door with his stuff and I went in to my dad’s office. My dad was sitting slumped

behind his desk. He was crying. I’d never seen him cry since my mom’s funeral. “I fucked up big time,” he

said with a sigh. “How am I going to tell his mom about this?”

“It’ll be alright. You know he loves our family, he isn’t going to sat away forever,” I said. Somehow I

doubted my own words. I knew that this would happen eventually; everything would fall apart because of

David and me.

“What I said yesterday, it came out all wrong,” my dad said while he stared the picture of Juliette on

his desk.

PART 7 RIGHT WHERE I BELONG

32. The family in chaos

At home the atmosphere was tense after my dad had told Juliette he’d had a fight with David and David

had subsequently quit his job. It had been three weeks since David had left the office and none of us had

heard firm him since then. On Sunday all of us where at home, except for David. Juliette started to cry in

the kitchen when we were alone together.

“David hasn’t called me in over three weeks and he’s answered none of my text messages or emails.

It’s nothing like him to let me worry like this. Just tell me what happened,” she asked me in between sobs.

“It’s all my fault. I’m the one who punched him in the face and he lied about it to cover for me. And then

at the party dad said something stupid about me punching him and David quit his job.”

“But why on earth did you hit him like that?” Juliette asked and then I was crying too.

“I didn’t mean to hurt him like that. I never meant to break his nose,” I exclaimed and then Juliette

hugged me like I was a little boy. I’d never let her hold me like this, not even when I was twelve.

“It’s alright Michael, just make things up with David again,” she whispered while she stroked my hair.

“I’m trying to reach him but he doesn’t answer my calls either,” I told her.

A couple of days later, David called his mom to say that he was alright but that he didn’t want to see

dad or me for a while. He didn’t explain his reasons to Juliette. Juliette and my dad got in to a huge fight

later that evening. I’d never heard them fight like that and she was virtually throwing things at him when I

came in to the room.

“David told me that he doesn’t want to see either you or Michael for a while. There must be a reason

for that. What are you not telling me?!”

My dad’s face was tense and he was biting his lower lip. “David heard me tell Michael that I was glad

that David’s not my real son. I had too much to drink. I just blurted it out. I didn’t mean it.” He looked

defeated.

“You said what?!” Juliette yelled. “You always told me that you love all our children equally. I love

Michael and Christine just as much as I love David and Jack and Justin. Are you telling me you lied to

me?”

“No I didn’t lie. I’ve always treated David just like the others. But he’s just so different from Michael

that sometimes I get annoyed too easily with him. It’s my fault not his. But I swear to you that I always

tried to be a good father to him.”

“I’ll go to David’s apartment, I’ll make sure he’s alright,” I said to calm them down. Juliette walked to

the kitchen and started preparing dinner; I could hear her banging the pans in anger. Half an hour later

Brad and Christine came in. We had dinner in silence; even the twins were quiet. After dinner Christine

talked to Juliette and my dad.

Brad and I walked outside. “You look terrible,” he told me.

“I haven’t been sleeping, this is such a mess.” I grabbed my hair and yanked it. “I can’t think of anything

but this fight with David.”

“That must have been some fight,” Brad said. “What were you fighting about?”

“Nothing,” I replied quickly.