“She’s in our system through Dr. Travers. I’m able to see all of her medical records. That’s why I called you in here. I need you to do something for me.”

“Anything,” I whisper. “I love her. I’ll do anything to help her.”

“Good… she’s going to need you. She’s going to need patience. She’s going to need help… but she’s going to need you to trust her.”

“I do trust-”

“Not like that. She’s going to need you to trust in her. Trust that she’s going to make it through this. When someone with PTSD goes through another horribly tragic event like this, it can set back their recovery and sometimes wipe all progress clear to the point of starting over.”

Oh.

“I will be there for her.” I grind, feeling the knot in my throat tighten again.

“Good… because, if you can’t promise me you’ll be there for her through everything and not get mad because she’s not the girl you fell in love with… you need to leave now.” He nods at the door and glares at me.

He’s fucking serious!

“I’m not leaving her,” I growl. “I need to see her,” I say, standing and walking to the door. “You can either show me, or I’ll find my on way.”

With my hand on the doorknob, he chuckles and stands to take me to my girl.

My Gabby.

Walking into her room, I see her like I’ve never seen her before.

Blank.

She’s awake. Laying in the hospital bed, her eyes open but not moving, she doesn’t respond to me entering the room. There are tubes all over her and machines beeping, but she’s not my Gabby. She looks the same, but there’s a look in her eyes that has me freaked out.

She’s blank.

The doctor gives me a look of warning before he leaves me be alone with her.

“Hey,” I whisper, walking to her side and taking her hand in mine. Before I can pull it to my mouth to kiss her, she pulls it away and looks out the window across the room.

Fuck.

I sigh and pull up a chair.

“Gabby,” I whisper. “I know you might not want me here, but I don’t care. I love you and I’m here.”

She doesn’t respond, which scares me.

I need my girl back.

And I’m not leaving her side until she’s my Gabby again.

We sit in silence for I don’t know how long. Thankful Annaliese is confident with Hannah, I don’t move a muscle, just waiting for Gabby to talk to me.

When the sun starts to rise I finally feel my eyes getting heavy. Refusing to leave her side, I lay my head back in the chair and drift off to sleep, remembering back when things were less complicated.

***

“What’s that?” Gabby asks, tracing the scar on my back.

“I got that in my first fight. I wasn’t trained well… and I wasn’t aware that some of the men out there were as ruthless as they were.” I sigh, not really wanting to relive that injury.

“What happened?” she whispers, laying gentle kisses on it. Jesus, if we’re just fucking around, this is walking dangerously close to romantic feelings and shit. I didn’t think she wanted that?

“I wasn’t watching him… apparently, neither were the refs. He pulled a knife and I went down.” I roll to my back so she can’t see it anymore and brush the hair from her face. “I don’t like to talk about my scars,” I whisper.

“Me either,” she whispers back, bringing her fingers to my jawline.

“Your bod is fucking pristine,” I growl, pulling her on top of me. She laughs and rolls her eyes.

“If you only knew,” she says, right before she kisses me and reaches down to rub my dick like she’s ravaged for it, even though we just got done having sex for the third time tonight about a half hour ago.

Damn, this woman will be the end of me.

***

“Hey,” her raspy voice wakes me from my light nap. I’ve been sleeping like shit these last few days so any chance I get now my eyes seem to close on their own accord.

“Hey!” I say, shooting up in my seat. Jesus, I need to calm down. She was just shot; I need to chill. I just… I need her. “How are you?” I reach for her again and, when my hand connects with hers, she just stares at it. Blankly. I sigh, not knowing what to say to her.

I’m sorry I wasn’t there to save you?

Thank you for jumping in front of the bullet that was headed for my girl?

I love you so much it literally hurts me knowing that you’re hurt and I can’t do anything about it?

“Water,” she rasps, trying to reach for her cup. It’s full of ice, so I give her a few chips and watch her close her eyes as she gently chews on it. When she’s done, she takes a ragged breath and opens her eyes, glancing down at her bandaged body. “More permanent reminders,” she whispers, shaking her head and laying it gently back on the pillow.

“More?” I whisper, watching her as she shuts down again.

It’s been days of her not talking to me. I’ve been sitting here just waiting. Waiting for the sparkle in her eyes to come back to normal. Waiting to hear her tell me she loves me. Waiting for something that has never came. Each day that passes, I fear it never will come.

“More.” She whispers, opening her eyes and gently lifting her head. “The eyes,” she manages. I know her voice is still scratchy and dry, but I’m not sure what she’s getting at.

“Eyes?” I hate to make her talk, but I don’t understand what her eyes have to do with permanent scars.

She smiles sadly and nods. Clearing her throat and taking another ice cube, she takes a breath and watches me as she tells me, in detail, what happened the night twelve years ago.

“When the car hit the tractor, the airbags all went off. I had on glasses at the time. A shard of glass got impaled in my eye… I didn’t have insurance, and didn’t get it checked out. It got infected... there were all kinds of complications.” She shrugs and looks out the window. “I’m losing sight in it. It gets worse as the years go on. I’m sure that, in a few more years, I’ll be completely blind in it.”

Blind?

“Jesus,” I say, sighing. “Gabby, I’m sorry, but I don’t see you as that person with a bad eye… or someone with scars. I see you as my Gabby. The woman who loves my daughter. I see you as the woman who makes me so goddamned hard every time she walks into the room.”

She grins and my heart warms. She hasn’t grinned for me in days. I’m actually getting somewhere.

At least, I thought I was. Until she starts playing with her ring. The look on her face tells me exactly what she’s going to say before she even says it, and my heart immediately starts to crack.

“B… I can’t do this,” she whispers. “I’m sorry.”

Slipping off the ring, she hands it back to me, and it’s all I can do not to scream at her, but the doctor’s words ring in my head.

Be patient with her.

“Gabby, please don’t do this.”

“Can you please go? I’m tired,” she says, pushing the button on the side of her bed.

Fuck!

“Yes, ma’am… Can we get you something?” The nurse’s voice rings through the small speaker on the side of her bed.

“I’m tired. Can you please make sure no guests for a while?” she says with her eyes closed. “My guest will be checking out shortly.”

I sigh and shake my head. Standing to leave, I make it to the door before I turn back to look at her. She’s my Gabby. I’m not giving up, and I’m not letting her push me away.

She needs me, but I need her more.

“I love you, Gabby,” I whisper, watching her take a deep breath after the words leave my mouth.

She’s listening. She knows. She’s just sad, and having a hard time. I’ll give her that, but what I won’t give her is the satisfaction that she’s hurt me. I know that’s what she’s trying to do. She’s trying to push me away, but it’s not that easy to do.

Making it out to the waiting room, I have a few missed calls from Adam that I need to tend to before he shows up here, pissed.