Little did Eden know that Sophie and I already had a night together a few months ago when we were on location for a cover shoot. This, however, was information Eden didn’t need.
“I’ve never been in the supply room with anyone that doesn’t mean something to me, Eden.” The thought of the supply room sent an unstoppable smirk to my lips as memories of pulling Ashlyn in there hit me.
Her eyes shot wide, and I swear she was on the brink of hyperventilating. “So there is someone! You wouldn’t say that if there wasn’t. This is going to kill me. Just tell me and I’ll leave you alone.”
Like hell she would.
A soft knock came from my closed office door and I silently thanked whoever it was for interrupting Eden’s interrogation. Slowly, the door opened and Ashlyn stepped through.
“Ash, just the girl I need. You will be able to help me,” Eden’s excited voice announced as she rushed across my office, grabbed Ashlyn’s hands, and dragged her in.
Fuck no! No way was this conversation happening.
“What are you two talking about?” Ashlyn asked with an amused laugh.
“I’m trying to work out who Josh is sleeping with. I’ve decided that he is woman busy, but he won’t tell me a thing. It’s not Jessica from accounts and, even though he flirts like crazy with Sophie from Marketing, he says it’s not her. Do you know? You two have been spending a lot of time together lately, so I thought you might know?”
This could not be happening. I had to have stepped into an alternative world, because there was no way my brother’s fiancé was telling the woman I was trying to make mine, and who had been sharing her body with me, about the other women I was supposedly fucking. Ashlyn’s eyes flashed immediately to mine as if trying to work out what to say, while Eden looked on eagerly.
“Oh wait, it has to be Leah in advertising. She is brunette, skinny, has big boobs, and is breathing. Totally your type.” Eden smirked, and held her hand up for Ashlyn to high five, which she slowly did.
Fuck my life. Where was a shotgun to put me out my misery?
She had completely lost her mind. Although with the past I had, it wasn’t that far from what would have been truth. But not anymore. The familiar ring tone of Eden’s phone sounded, and by the smile that crossed her face, I knew it was Ky.
With a moment of reprieve, I chanced a glance to Ashlyn, who I found staring back at me. Moving toward her, I knew my intentions, and I was going to make them clear.
“I’m not fucking anyone,” I whispered, dropping my mouth to her ear, and not caring where I was or about the potential of being heard by Eden. The strongest urge to drown whatever was swimming through her pretty head hit me full force.
“You mean you aren’t fucking anyone besides me?”
“That whole conversation, w—”
“You’ve never had to explain yourself before, so you don’t have to explain yourself now. I’ve been around those kinds of conversations plenty of times, and I’m sure this won’t be the last.”
“You’re kidding, right?” I asked forcefully.
She shook her head, but I couldn’t ignore the hesitation that crossed her green eyes. She didn’t believe a single word she was saying, so why try forcing that bullshit on me. She didn’t want to be a part of that conversation as much as I didn’t want to experience it again.
“What are you kidding about?” Eden piped up, and it was only then that I remembered we had company.
“I just asked if it was Lauren,” Ashlyn said with a convincing laugh.
“Oh my god, Ky would rip your balls off if you went anywhere near Lauren. He is almost as protective of Lauren as he is you, Ash. Okay, that’s going a bit far. I’d say Ky was about fifty percent as protective of Lauren as he is of you, and that’s saying something. I fear for the next guy you date, Ash. Ky is going to be like an overprotective father, big brother, and crazy uncle all in one.”
“Ky needs to learn that Ashlyn can do whatever the fuck she wants,” I shot out before I could stop myself. Two sets of eyes fell to me—Eden’s wide with wonderment, and Ashlyn’s wide with shock. Eden’s phone dinged in her hand, and her eyes fell from mine to her phone.
“Ease up, Tarzan. Just go along with it and stop beating your chest so obviously,” Ashlyn whispered beside me.
That nickname would be the death of me.
“I’ve been summoned by my lovely fiancé, so I’ll talk to you both soon. Ash, I’ll see you for wine time on Friday. And Josh, I will get to the bottom of this. I know there is someone.”
“I’ll keep working on him. I think I saw a hot blond in here the other day,” Ashlyn admitted with a smirk. “See you on Friday, babe.”
The moment the door closed behind Eden, I swung around to Ashlyn. Her shoulders slouched as she took a deep breath, and she moved to the large window that looked out over the city. I rubbed my temples as a tension headache appeared, and tried to figure out what I could say to correct what had just happened.
I crossed the room until I was standing behind her. In the reflection of the glass, her eyes met mine and she offered me a brief smile. My arms threaded around her waist and my hands clasped together, resting on her stomach.
“I’m not kissing anyone, I’m not touching anyone, and I’m certainly not fucking anyone.”
Our gazes remained locked, and I was desperate for her to believe the sincerity of my words. The hesitation of her actions and the confusion that I witnessed repeatedly weren’t lost on me, no matter how hard she tried to hide it. My reputation wasn’t favorable, and that was something I had to live with, but having it put on display like that was the worst thing that could have happened. Ashlyn had a front-row seat to the life I led, the one of the cliché bachelor, and now here I was trying to make her see that my back was turned to that lifestyle. Now was the time for me to fix her broken and shattered heart and show her what true love had the capacity to be. I was fighting a life-changing battle. One thing I refused, though, was to be put in the same column as Lachlan.
“I’m not him,” I whispered huskily into her ear. A shiver traveled down her body, and her hands fell to mine.
“I’m not him,” I repeated, this time kissing the skin beneath her ear after I spoke. When I pulled away and looked into the reflection of the glass, I found that she had closed her eyes.
“Ashlyn, I’m not him.”
I would continue to say it until she told me to stop, or until she pulled away. Everything about this was in her court. I would continue to come at her, to push my way into her every waking thought, and hopefully appear in her dreams. I needed her to know that I wasn’t going anywhere. I would not make that mistake again. Ashlyn Hart was the temptation of the only life I wanted.
“I know,” she finally replied.
“What will it take for you to truly believe that?”
She twisted in my arms until we were chest to chest. Her hands came around me and grabbed the back of my belt, but I remained silent. “I’d say you’re doing a pretty good job at making me believe it.”
“You’re the only one I see, Ashy. I don’t want or need to be with anyone else. I’m pissed off that you are constantly reminded of who I was and who I’ve been with. You don’t need that reminder, especially when you are sharing your body with me.”
Her laugher was like music to my ears. “Is that what I’m doing? Sharing my body with you?”
“Ashlyn, I’ve given you multiple orgasms, you’ve come on my fingers, tongue, and cock, and I’ve fallen asleep with you in my arms. So yeah, I think that constitutes you sharing your body with me.”
Her cheeks flushed, but her eyes never left mine. “You have a way with words, Joshua Crawford, but I guess I can’t really disagree with any of that. Does this mean we have officially stepped into friends-with-benefits territory?”
She could not be serious. There was no way that this woman just referred to herself as my friend with benefits. I wanted to climb inside her head and erase every possible reason why she would come to that conclusion. I stepped away and moved back to my desk. A look of misunderstanding washed over her face, and her green eyes shimmered with confusion. I leaned against my desk, and crossed my legs at my ankles and my arms over my chest. My gaze locked with hers, and a chilly silence fell between us.