Thou flea, thou nit, thou winter-cricket, thou.

Braved in mine own house with a skein of thread!

Away, thou rag, thou quantity, thou remnant,

Or I shall so bemete thee with thy yard

As thou shalt think on prating whilst thou liv’st.

I tell thee, I, that thou hast marred her gown.

TAILOR

Your worship is deceived. The gown is made

Just as my master had direction.

Grumio gave order how it should be done.

GRUMIO

I gave him no order, I gave him the stuff.

TAILOR

But how did you desire it should be made?

GRUMIO Marry, sir, with needle and thread.

TAILOR

But did you not request to have it cut?

GRUMIO Thou hast faced many things.

TAILOR I have.

GRUMIO Face not me. Thou hast braved many men. Brave not me. I will neither be faced nor braved. I say unto thee I bid thy master cut out the gown, but I did not bid him cut it to pieces. Ergo thou liest.

TAILOR (showing a paper) Why, here is the note of the fashion, to testify.

PETRUCCIO Read it.

GRUMIO The note lies in’s throat if he say I said so.

TAILOR (reads) ‘Imprimis, a loose-bodied gown.’

GRUMIO Master, if ever I said loose-bodied gown, sew me in the skirts of it and beat me to death with a bottom of brown thread. I said a gown.

PETRUCCIO Proceed.

TAILOR (reads) ‘With a small compassed cape.’

GRUMIO I confess the cape.

TAILOR (reads) ‘With a trunk sleeve.’

GRUMIO I confess two sleeves.

TAILOR (reads) ‘The sleeves curiously cut.’

PETRUCCIO Ay, there’s the villany.

GRUMIO Error i‘th’ bill, sir, error i’th’ bill. I commanded the sleeves should be cut out and sewed up again, and that I’ll prove upon thee though thy little finger be armed in a thimble. 146

TAILOR This is true that I say. An I had thee in place where, thou shouldst know it.

GRUMIO I am for thee straight. Take thou the bill, give me thy mete-yard, and spare not me.

HORTENSIO Godamercy, Grumio, then he shall have no odds.

PETRUCCIO

Well, sir, in brief, the gown is not for me.

GRUMIO You are i‘th’ right, sir. ‘Tis for my mistress.

PETRUCCIO (to the Tailor)

Go, take it up unto thy master’s use.

GRUMIO (to the Tailor) Villain, not for thy life. Take up my mistress’ gown for thy master’s use!

PETRUCCIO Why, sir, what’s your conceit in that?

GRUMIO O, sir, the conceit is deeper than you think for. ‘Take up my mistress’ gown to his master’s use’—O fie, fie, fie!

PETRUCCIO (aside)

Hortensio, say thou wilt see the tailor paid.

(To the Tailor) Go, take it hence. Be gone, and say no

more.

HORTENSIO (aside to the Tailor)

Tailor, I’ll pay thee for thy gown tomorrow.

Take no unkindness of his hasty words.

Away, I say. Commend me to thy master.

Exit Tailor

PETRUCCIO

Well, come, my Kate. We will unto your father’s

Even in these honest, mean habiliments.

Our purses shall be proud, our garments poor,

For ‘tis the mind that makes the body rich,

And as the sun breaks through the darkest clouds,

So honour peereth in the meanest habit.

What, is the jay more precious than the lark

Because his feathers are more beautiful?

Or is the adder better than the eel

Because his painted skin contents the eye?

O no, good Kate, neither art thou the worse

For this poor furniture and mean array.

If thou account’st it shame, lay it on me,

And therefore frolic; we will hence forthwith

To feast and sport us at thy father’s house.

Go call my men, and let us straight to him,

And bring our horses unto Long Lane end.

There will we mount, and thither walk on foot.

Let’s see, I think ’tis now some seven o’clock,

And well we may come there by dinner-time.

KATHERINE

I dare assure you, sir, ’tis almost two,

And ’twill be supper-time ere you come there.

PETRUCCIO

It shall be seven ere I go to horse.

Look what I speak, or do, or think to do,

You are still crossing it. Sirs, let’t alone.

I will not go today, and ere I do

It shall be what o’clock I say it is.

HORTENSIO (aside)

Why, so this gallant will command the sun.

Exeunt

4.4 Enter Tranio as Lucentio, and the Pedant dressed like Vincentio, booted and bare-headed

TRANIO

Sir, this is the house. Please it you that I call?

PEDANT

Ay, what else. And but I be deceived,

Signor Baptista may remember me

Near twenty years ago in Genoa—

TRANIO

Where we were lodgers at the Pegasus.—

Tis well, and hold your own in any case

With such austerity as ‘longeth to a father.

Enter Biondello

PEDANT

I warrant you. But sir, here comes your boy.

’Twere good he were schooled.

TRANIO

Fear you not him. Sirrah Biondello,

Now do your duty throughly, I advise you.

Imagine ’twere the right Vincentio.

BIONDELLO Tut, fear not me.

TRANIO

But hast thou done thy errand to Baptista?

BIONDELLO

I told him that your father was at Venice

And that you looked for him this day in Padua.

TRANIO (giving money)

Thou’rt a tall fellow. Hold thee that to drink.

Here comes Baptista. Set your countenance, sir.

Enter Baptista, and Lucentio as Cambio

TRANIO

Signor Baptista, you are happily met.

(To the Pedant) Sir, this is the gentleman I told you of.

I pray you stand good father to me now.

Give me Bianca for my patrimony.

PEDANT

Soft, son. (To Baptista) Sir, by your leave, having

come to Padua

To gather in some debts, my son Lucentio

Made me acquainted with a weighty cause

Of love between your daughter and himself,

And for the good report I hear of you,

And for the love he beareth to your daughter,