Nor never needed that I should entreat,

Am starved for meat, giddy for lack of sleep,

With oaths kept waking and with brawling fed,

And that which spites me more than all these wants,

He does it under name of perfect love,

As who should say if I should sleep or eat

‘Twere deadly sickness, or else present death.

I prithee, go and get me some repast.

I care not what, so it be wholesome food.

GRUMIO What say you to a neat’s foot?

KATHERINE

‘Tis passing good. I prithee, let me have it.

GRUMIO

I fear it is too choleric a meat.

How say you to a fat tripe finely broiled?

KATHERINE

I like it well. Good Grumio, fetch it me.

GRUMIO

I cannot tell, I fear ’tis choleric.

What say you to a piece of beef, and mustard?

KATHERINE

A dish that I do love to feed upon.

GRUMIO

Ay, but the mustard is too hot a little.

KATHERINE

Why then, the beef, and let the mustard rest.

GRUMIO

Nay, then I will not. You shall have the mustard,

Or else you get no beef of Grumio.

KATHERINE

Then both, or one, or anything thou wilt.

GRUMIO

Why then, the mustard without the beef.

KATHERINE

Go, get thee gone, thou false, deluding slave,

(Beating him) That feed’st me with the very name of

meat.

Sorrow on thee and all the pack of you,

That triumph thus upon my misery.

Go, get thee gone, I say.

Enter Petruccio and Hortensio, with meat

PETRUCCIO

How fares my Kate? What, sweeting, all amort?

HORTENSIO

Mistress, what cheer?

KATHERINE

Faith, as cold as can be.

PETRUCCIO

Pluck up thy spirits, look cheerfully upon me.

Here, love, thou seest how diligent I am

To dress thy meat myself and bring it thee. 40

I am sure, sweet Kate, this kindness merits thanks.

What, not a word? Nay then, thou lov’st it not,

And all my pains is sorted to no proof.

Here, take away this dish.

KATHERINE I pray you, let it stand.

PETRUCCIO

The poorest service is repaid with thanks,

And so shall mine before you touch the meat.

KATHERINE I thank you, sir.

HORTENSIO

Signor Petruccio, fie, you are to blame.

Come, Mistress Kate, I’ll bear you company.

PETRUCCIO (aside)

Eat it up all, Hortensio, if thou lov’st me.

(To Katherine) Much good do it unto thy gentle heart.

Kate, eat apace; and now, my honey love,

Will we return unto thy father’s house,

And revel it as bravely as the best,

With silken coats, and caps, and golden rings,

With ruffs, and cuffs, and farthingales, and things,

With scarves, and fans, and double change of

bravery,

With amber bracelets, beads, and all this knavery.

What, hast thou dined? The tailor stays thy leisure,

To deck thy body with his ruffling treasure.

Enter Tailor with a gown

Come, tailor, let us see these ornaments.

Lay forth the gown.

Enter Haberdasher with a cap

What news with you, sir?

HABERDASHER

Here is the cap your worship did bespeak.

PETRUCCIO

Why, this was moulded on a porringer—

A velvet dish. Fie, fie, ‘tis lewd and filthy.

Why, ’tis a cockle or a walnut-shell,

A knack, a toy, a trick, a baby’s cap.

Away with it! Come, let me have a bigger.

KATHERINE

I’ll have no bigger. This doth fit the time,

And gentlewomen wear such caps as these.

PETRUCCIO

When you are gentle you shall have one, too,

And not till then.

HORTENSIO (aside) That will not be in haste.

KATHERINE

Why, sir, I trust I may have leave to speak,

And speak I will. I am no child, no babe.

Your betters have endured me say my mind,

And if you cannot, best you stop your ears.

My tongue will tell the anger of my heart,

Or else my heart concealing it will break,

And rather than it shall I will be free

Even to the uttermost as I please in words.

PETRUCCIO

Why, thou sayst true. It is a paltry cap,

A custard-coffin, a bauble, a silken pie.

I love thee well in that thou lik’st it not.

KATHERINE

Love me or love me not, I like the cap

And it I will have, or I will have none.

[Exit Haberdasher]

PETRUCCIO

Thy gown? Why, ay. Come, tailor, let us see’t.

O mercy, God, what masquing stuff is here?

What’s this—a sleeve? ‘Tis like a demi-cannon.

What, up and down carved like an apple-tart?

Here’s snip, and nip, and cut, and slish and slash,

Like to a scissor in a barber’s shop.

Why, what o’ devil’s name, tailor, call’st thou this?

HORTENSIO (aside)

I see she’s like to have nor cap nor gown.

TAILOR

You bid me make it orderly and well,

According to the fashion and the time.

PETRUCCIO

Marry, and did, but if you be remembered

I did not bid you mar it to the time.

Go hop me over every kennel home,

For you shall hop without my custom, sir.

I’ll none of it. Hence, make your best of it.

KATHERINE

I never saw a better fashioned gown,

More quaint, more pleasing, nor more commendable.

Belike you mean to make a puppet of me.

PETRUCCIO

Why true, he means to make a puppet of thee.

TAILOR She says your worship means to make a puppet of her.

PETRUCCIO

O monstrous arrogance! Thou liest, thou thread, thou

thimble,

Thou yard, three-quarters, half-yard, quarter, nail,