No doubt a desire to fuck her, to be part of her body, as it were, for the time, must have flashed through me, but the carnal want if I had it then (and I'm not sure) was for the moment eclipsed by admiration, and a feeling which may perhaps be called pure love.
I addressed her politely. “May I have the pleasure of going home with you?” “I don't recollect you, have you been introduced to me?” “No, but you may intro-duce me yourself, to yourself, in any way you like.” She laughed, looked at her watch and then at me all over.
— “I don't want to leave here before eleven, my brougham won't be here, and I am expecting some one.” “I'll wait but may I sleep with you?” “Yes, perhaps, I'll see.” Then for fear of subsequent unpleasantry, I said after a little reflection, “I can only give you so much.” Again she looked me over quickly, and said, “Very well,” with a laugh.
We went home in her bourgham to B****t*n S****e
— I did not speak a lewed word on the road — I felt delicate about it. “You didn't offer me any supper,” said she on her arrival. “You didn't ask.” Her servant brought her some. — “Will you give me some champagne?” “Willingly; shall your servant fetch it?” “I have some in the house.” We both had some, and some cold meat, then went to the bed room, and I there kissed her for the first time, and she me. — “Oblige me before you undress.” “What?” “Lay down just as you are, and let me see your charms unless you have drawers on.” “I have none,” and laughing she got on to the bed. I threw her clothes up so as to show one leg and half of her belly, and the other leg partially, and went to the other side of the room to con-template her pose. Her limbs were white, beautiful in form, and she looked exquisitely voluptuous as she lay with a bit of the delicate fringe of her cunt filling up the triangle of her thighs and belly; silk stockings and kid boots, fitting to perfection, added to the charm. — I rushed up to her and kissed her motte, then rapidly undressing, got into bed, she leisurely followed. By the time she had piddled I was wild with anticipation of pleasure to come. — “No, leave both candles burning, my love.”
She cuddled up to me, in a winning quiet way. It was a coldish night, the sort of night when the naked flesh of a woman feels most exquisite to me, as it touches my own. My prick lay squeezed between our two bellies so close had I drawn her. — “How stiff it is,” said she laughing. — I kissed her as if I could devour her, then loosening her, my hand felt all over her cunt, my fingers went up it. I restrained myself from coiting, but almost groaned with lust. — “Do it,” said she in a sweet little voice. “Let me see your cunt.” — She turned on her back (her nightgown already up to her breasts), opened her thighs, and I saw a perfectly lovely cunt in the midst of a light auburn silky thicket. — Then with a thrill and murmur of delight, I put my prick up it. — I thrill with delight at the recollection as I write of it now, and in too short a time we died off in each other's arms, with throbbing, ecstatic pleasures. Can the joys of paradise be greater than those I feel when my prick moves for the first time in the smooth, moist, warm cunt of a lovely woman, when that cunt, in its slip and profundity, seems made for my prick, as N**l*e H****s seemed made for mine — a perfect fit.
“No don't wash.” “Yes, I always do.” “You shan't.” “I must,” and she did. “I'll look at it well if you do.” “As you like.” — I washed my prick, and we laid on the bed, and I looked at her from back bone to navel. — How I revelled in the sight. — “Now are you satisfied?” — “Yes, for a minute, but I could look you all over for ever.”
Then I cuddled her. “Let me go to sleep.” “No, I must have you again.” — She laid feeling my prick, I her cunt. We were both very quiet, — she was not a talker I found. How delicious was that quiet feel, and the rising voluptuousness gradually stealing thro me. I stiffened. — “Put it in.” “Not yet love, let me feel you longer.” — Again we were quiet. “I shall spend if you keep on — put it in.” — Then into her and up her I went, and had a delicious rest inside before movement. How exquisite she looked as silently we lay, how perfectly her vagina seemed to fit my prick. A throbbing grip of her cunt hurried me into action, — she spent with me, — and seemingly enervated, turned and went to sleep without washing this time.
In a couple of hours I awakened — it seemed a sin to awaken her, but I did by lascivious touches. — What odd fancies I have with women. With one I do one thing, — with another something different. I wonder if other men have such baudy whims. Puffing down the clothes and unskinning my prick, I rubbed it gently over her naked bum. Then I wetted her bum with my spittle, and rubbed my prick there till it was erect, then got gently out of bed and pushed my prick near to her face, it delighted me to be doing so, and she unconscious. Then laying down I tried to insert my prick in her cunt from behind, which awakened her.
“What are you doing, what do you awaken me for?” said she angrily. “Let's do it.” “I shan't, you've done it twice, you may do it again in the morning, — I never let men do it more than twice to me — I won't.” “Then let me feel you, there — just — just so,” and I slipped a finger partly up her cunt from behind. “Oh don't, your nails hurt,” said she turning on to her back to escape me. My hand slipped over her lovely haunches, I raised myself on my elbow and instantly my fingers were on her clitoris. “I can't bear men sleeping with me, — I nearly always lay awake all night, — I was nearly asleep,” said she angrily. — I had been as I often was at first with women, quite delicate in my phraseology. — Now I talked lewedly, coarsely, her cunt excited me, I kissed her all over incessantly, — I smelt her cunt, and much wonder I did not lick it, gradually she yielded, laughed and opening her thighs, — “Oh what a lewed beast you are,” she said. — I got between them at once. — She had refused my tongue before but now she joined it to hers. — “Oh, you beast
— how lewed you've made me,” and sympathetically moving her thighs, silence came over us, as my prick thrust deep, and short, and quick, as we mingled our spittles, and my sperm shot out into her cunt again. Soon now we were both asleep, my wet prick trailing over her lovely thigh, she on her back with thighs open.
But I could not rest. Tho I had had plenty of fucking recently, I felt with her as if I had not had a woman for a month. Something in this woman stirred my lust in its innermost recesses. I felt spooney. I could not help awaking her, and I roused her lust, for she responded, and we fucked, and fucked, till no sperm would come from me. — “Oh what a lewed beast you are,” she kept saying, and then she spent. — At length nature insisted on repose and it was eleven o'clock before we awakened. — She had quite recovered her coolness. — Yes she had slept well. She rarely did with men. — She felt she could sleep by the side of me tho a stranger. — She did not know why. — No I could not have her the next night. And mind, not such another night, when I did. — I could come three days hence, she was engaged every night till then. She went to the Argyle just to see friends, but whether she went there or not did not matter. — Look at her letters. I did, and saw several asking the evenings she might be disengaged. — She took my money as if it were dirt and I departed.
Another and another night I had her, my heart began to beat with a feeling of love and affection for her, and spite of her I roused her lust and we fucked till prick and cunt were sore. — Then she went away with a friend, and I saw no more of her for a month. She then had moved to another house. I saw her once or twice there but she would not let me sleep with her. Then I was away for a little time, and called on her on my re-turn one morning. — She could not see me, she was engaged. — Again I called in the afternoon. Then she was out, her little maid said, and smirked at me, and behaved funnily. — “You won't see her, — oh dear no, even if you call again. — I wouldn't call again if I were you.” — I tipped her half a sovereign, and then she said Mrs. H* * * *s was at home when I called in the morning, and that no one was with her, but she would not see me. She would be back presently. — I would wait I said. — “Oh pray do my dear, but I've told you not mind,” and she began trying on bonnets of her mistress which were laying in the room. How did she look. “Shouldn't I get gentlemen if I had fine bon-nets?” “Yes if you had a fine leg.” “It's not so bad is it?” said she pulling up her clothes to her knees, and dropping them.