I take Andy’s hand in mine. “There are a few things I need to show you and do before I can answer you.”

When we get to my place, he sits on the couch when I go to my room to get something. I come back to the room and sit next to him before I hand him the letter. It’s the letter Ben gave to me from Drew those many, many months ago.

I WALK UP TO ANDY, OR Drew, as I should now call him, and hand him the manila envelope I received last week. It was from Ben, which surprised me a little, but the mysterious contents intrigued me even more. Inside were two more envelopes, one addressed to me, and the other said, “The One—Cate—DO NOT OPEN!”

When I read the letter in the one addressed to me, my emotions were all over the place as I was thrown by the handwriting. Of course, I should have known he would’ve thought of everything. And he did.

Cate,

If you’re reading this, then Ben has deemed it was the appropriate time to pass this along, which means you have found THE ONE. Ben’s instructions were to send you this when he knew you had either fallen in love again, or were getting married. I hope, for your sake, that you are the happiest woman in the world. It is my most fervent wish that you live life to its fullest with the man of your dreams.

The other envelope is for him. Don’t you dare open it. If he chooses to share it with you, that is his business.

Be happy. You deserve nothing less than the best.

Yours,

Drew

Tears clouded my vision when I read it.

Now I stand before my other Drew, or Andy, and hand him his letter. His eyes ping back and forth between it and me. “What is this?”

“It’s from Drew. Ben sent it.”

A V forms between his brows and he turns it over a few times in his hands as he stares at it. He sits on the couch with his forearms resting on his thighs. I can’t even imagine what he must be thinking as he holds a letter from his girlfriend’s deceased husband.

“This is pretty weird, Cate.”

“Yeah, I know. If you don’t want to read it …”

“No, I do.” He fills his lungs with air and very gently opens the thick paper. Inside, I see the familiar handwriting, but I don’t dare peek. I walk to the other side of the room as he reads. He stops for a moment, wipes his face, and continues. When he’s finished, there isn’t a dry part of his face. Tears freely run and he does nothing to stop them. His arm extends out to me with the letter in his hand.

“You should read this.”

I take it from him and exchange it for a handful of tissues. Then I begin.

To THE ONE,

Since you’re reading this, Cate has either consented to marry you or has told you she’s fallen in love with you. If you haven’t yet asked her to marry you, you’d better do so. Love—those words don’t come easy for her, nor does she say them frivolously to just anyone. So you are one lucky bastard, let me tell you. And with that being said, I would ask that you treat her like the most precious bird alive. Most people think their loved ones need to be treated like gems. But gems are hard, and don’t need special care. Cate does. Don’t let her fly away. I’m sure she wanted to run from you. She probably felt guilty about loving you. Tell her I said to forget about that damn guilt. It’s a useless emotion that will bring her nothing but more pain. If she’s chosen you, you’d better do everything in your power to deserve her, because she’s special.

Cate changed my life. She has a way of putting her handprint on things and when she does, they are never the same again. She did that to me. She put the extra beat in my heart, made the blood flow faster through my veins, made my soul burn brighter and my sprit grow deeper. Once she entered my life, I knew there was no going back. I hope she does that to you, too. I once said that getting cancer made me more empathetic. That wasn’t true. It was Cate who did that to me.

I wanted her to move on and to find someone else after me, and I’m glad she did. My friend, Ben, has my permission to kick your ass if you’re not good to her. And he will. He’s that kind of guy. But I’m hoping he doesn’t have to because I truly want you to make her the happiest woman on Earth. For everything I put her through, she deserves it.

Now go and do her right. Treat her well and love her with everything you’ve got. You won’t be disappointed.

Drew McKnight

The letter flutters out of my hand because I’m incapable of anything, standing, seeing, talking, or breathing. Andy’s scent is all around me, so I know he’s there as I break into all the pieces Drew loved.

“Cate, baby, it’s going to be okay.”

I’m not so sure. Drew has been gone now for almost three years, yet the pain still stabs me in the chest like it happened yesterday. I feel like one of the pieces of me left with all the pieces of him when they departed this world.

“I’m sorry. It just came back. He was always a good guy and here he proves it in death.” I sob. “I’m sorry,” I say again.

“There’s nothing to be sorry for. You wouldn’t be the woman I fell in love with if that letter didn’t affect you. He loved you and I have big shoes to fill.”

I let him hold me as I continue to cry. Somewhere as Andy holds me with no judgment, no jealousy, no anything but all of his love, a piece inside that was missing fits into place.

As the tears slow, I realize I’m blessed for having Drew for the time I did. He showed me what love is, what it was meant to be. He gave me the tools to know when love was right. He gave me all of him as I had given all of myself in return. He wanted me to find love again. And I have. I hadn’t been sure until this point that I had a hundred percent to give back to someone else. But I was wrong.

I think back to something Drew said long ago. He said he didn’t believe in one soul mate for everyone. And I’m grateful he’s right. Not that I wanted him to pass from this earth and from me. But I’m humbled to have found someone else I could love so completely, who loves me the same way.

Immeasurable eyes, the color of calm clear seas, cornflowers blowing in the breeze and the skies on the clearest days, wait patiently as I break over another man. It’s then I know for sure that I’m the luckiest woman in the world. Not many people are given a second chance at love. I won’t waste mine.

“Yes,” I say.

He has no idea that while staring at him, I know I’ve built myself up again and I’m ready to take the plunge.

“Yes?”

“Yes, I’ll marry you if you’ll have me.”

The drive isn’t long and neither is the walk. Cate’s hands are linked in mine and she’s not sure why I brought us here because I haven’t told her. There’s no noise as we walk across the grass to a place of eternal rest, or so they say. The birds are even respectful as a peaceful calm greets us as we make our way to the stone.

It isn’t fancy, because according to all I’ve learned, it wasn’t Drew’s style to be. The marble headstone is simple and has just the right number of words.

Andrew Standford McKnight

Cherished Son

and

Loving Husband

I glance down at Cate. Nerves are starting to get the better of me. I squeeze her hand while I run the other over my hair. I try to smile to encourage her as I search for the words I haven’t exactly practiced. I turn away from her to give my attention to the headstone.