I take a quick video as they come off the stage and shake hands with Steel Total Destruction while the crew rushes to change the set. In the chaos, I concentrate on breathing and the screen as I retweet, then post.

I see his boots and try to ignore them, but he doesn’t move, so I look up. As his eyes narrow for a moment, I wonder what he thinks of me now, after the freak out.

“Gonna wish me luck?”

“Of course.” I nod. “Break a leg.”

“You good?” he asks.

“You high?” I retort.

“Just relaxed.”

I nod. “Well, then”—I look up at him—“I hope you can work through it.”

I walk around him, but he grabs my hand, so I turn back and look at him.

“We’re all working through something.”

My chest feels heavy as I close my eyes and shake my head. “I’m sorry.”

“Me, too.” He lets go of my hand, turns, and walks away.

Taelyn walks over. “Everything okay?”

I nod. “Yeah.”

We watch as they do their huddle, ending in a fist explosion, and I video the entire thing. It’s part of their ritual, part of who Steel Total Destruction is. Band mates is what they call themselves, but they are more than that. It’s evident in their closeness and the way they look out for one another.

On stage, River taps them in, and the sound of Finn’s bass explodes, followed by Billy on the acoustic.

I look left to see Memphis with his hands on Tally’s face, kissing her. They are two very different people who make an amazing couple. While his forehead rests on hers, I don’t know what words are exchanged, but she blushes, smiles, bites her lips. Then he bends his knees, looking directly into her eyes, and says something that causes her to laugh out loud then cover her mouth. He beams at her response and kisses her again before storming the stage.

“Hello, Texas!” He holds the mic out for the crowd’s response. “I am Memphis Black, lead singer for Steel Total Destruction!” He allows the crowd’s electricity to crackle in a thunderous roar. “You ready for some STD? You ready to get rocked so hard you can’t walk straight for a week?” I hear them again, but this time, the sound is like the Fourth of July: screaming, cheering, excitement out of control. “I like the way you sound. Finn, get ’em ready, man.”

“Prepare yourselves to get fucked,” Finn’s voice booms through the speakers.

“Did he really just say that?” Xavier laughs.

“He did.” Taelyn joins him. “Goodbye reclusive bass player. Hello, Beckett.”

“Going Down” begins.

“Did you talk Finn into singing?” I hear Tally ask Nick.

“No, but we have a plan.” He gives her a mischievous smile. That smile makes me nervous for him.

Getting lost in the feeling of their music isn’t hard. They are by far one of the most talented bands I have ever heard. Not only are they talented, but they seem to become one.

After “Surface to Soul” plays, Memphis walks over and whispers to Finn. His body stiffens and his head hangs low as Memphis motions off stage and the lights dim on stage.

Nick runs on stage, and Memphis says something to him before gesturing for a drink, and one of the roadies runs out with a bottle of water. I see Finn walk to center stage while Nick runs off stage, grabs Memphis’s guitar, and then runs it back on stage.

River taps the drums, the acoustic guitars sound up, and a song I have never heard before starts. Then the lights come up, spotlighting Finn. He lets go of the guitar, cups the mic, and his low, raspy voice—his bedroom voice—tingles in my ears.

“Hello, Dallas.” He doesn’t call to them for a response like Memphis; he draws them in; he is seducing them. “I’m Finn Beckett, bass guitarist, song writer, and occasionally, I am asked to stand here and lend you my voice.”

The crowd cheers, though not loudly.

“I wrote this song a long time ago, and although the past should stay where it is, sometimes it just needs to be heard.”

He glances off stage in my direction. I’m not sure if he’s looking at me or if I just want that voice, that seductive bedroom voice, to not be for them. Selfishly, I want it to be for me.

I walk alone, searching for truth.

The dusty road clouds my blues.

In the light of day, she never is you.

Looking ’round, it’s all like a dream.

All I wanted has been sewn together, no seam.

I search for you in my darkest hours, but you’re still gone.

The love we had never was true.

My shattered heart was swept up by the wind and blown.

I’m going blind.

You took what was mine,

Left me behind.

Now I can’t find me.

Oh … Oh-oh-oh …

Oh … Oh-oh-oh.

I’m going blind.

You took what was mine,

Left me behind.

Now I can’t find me.

Oh … Oh-oh-oh …

Oh … Oh-oh-oh.

The light, it shines ubiquitously.

I can still smell your scent universally.

The hole you left can never be filled.

No drink, no smoke, no fucking pills.

I wanna feel the aching I’ve earned.

Chalk it up to a lesson learned.

I try so hard. Can’t believe you’re not mine.

Now it’s time. Yes, it’s time

To let go and find my heart that was blown away.

Lock it up tight.

Mend it, I might.

But I’m still going blind.

You took what was mine,

Left me behind.

Now I can’t find me.

Oh … Oh-oh-oh …

Oh … Oh-oh-oh.

I’m still going blind.

You took what was mine,

Left me behind.

Now I can’t find me.

Oh … Oh-oh-oh …

Oh … Oh-oh-oh.

I walk alone, seeking the truth.

The dusty road now comforts my blues.

In the light of day, I’m glad she’s not you.

I still look around. It’s still like a dream.

All I ever wanted is now sewn together, loose seam.

I search for me in my darkest hours, but I’m still gone.

The love we had never was true.

My shattered heart is now whole. Empty my soul,

But I’m still going blind.

You took what was mine,

Left me behind.

Now I can’t find me.

Oh … Oh-oh-oh …

Oh … Oh-oh-oh.

I’m still going blind.

You stole what was mine.

Left me behind.

Now I can’t find me.

Oh … Oh-oh-oh …

Oh … Oh-oh-oh.

I’m still going blind.

You stole what was mine,

Left me behind.

Now I can’t find me.

Oh … Oh-oh-oh …

Oh … Oh-oh-oh.

The music ends, the crowd roars, and my heart shatters for him, for me, for … her. Then the lights dim, and over the speakers, his husky rasp starts again. No drums, no guitar, just his voice.

I don’t want to be blind.

I just want to see.

Look in the mirror, and let it be me.

Oh … Oh-oh-oh …

Oh … Oh-oh-oh.

Don’t fucking want to be blind.

Just wanna see that face in the mirror that once was me.

Oh … Oh-oh-oh …

Oh … Oh-oh-oh.

The crowd’s roar hits a new high.

“That was Finn Fucking Beckett, ladies and gentlemen. Give it up for Finn!” Memphis yells to the crowd.