“Shoot, Zoester.”

“You know, when he said ‘love you’? What do you think he meant by that?”

“Honey, this man’s going to sweep you off your feet.”

The breath in my throat hitches. In the corner of my eye, I glimpse the Kurt Kussler poster I shattered in a fit of madness. It’s leaning against a wall. I still haven’t fixed it, and now I regret my actions. Before I can get down on myself, Jeffrey’s boyfriend Chaz gets on FaceTime and makes me laugh again. He berates Katrina’s red carpet performance.

“Oh my friggin’ God! I wanted to barf. That bitch was in everyone’s face. I wanted to slap her! And can you believe that dress? It was so vomiticious! Oh and when Brandon blew you a kiss, she practically blew a fuse.”

I’m laughing my head off. I so love Jeffrey and Chaz. They’re my equivalent of Cinderella’s chattering, adorable, supportive mice. We watch the rest of the Golden Globes together, and we all squeal when Kurt Kussler wins for “Best Drama Series” near the very end. The cast and crew rush to the stage and swarm a blown-away Brandon. Executive Producer Doug DeMille speaks for them all. What a night for the show! What a night for Brandon! What a night for me! I only wish I could be there with Brandon to celebrate.

After Tina and Amy congratulate all the winners and thank everyone for watching, I bid Jeffrey and Chaz goodnight. In no time, I’m hugging Teddy, dreaming of my Prince Charming.

The subconscious is a strange place. When I doze off, all of tonight’s events come together in a fantastical dream that plays out in my head like a surreal fairy tale.

It’s the night of the most anticipated event in Lalaland. The Golden Globe Ball. Everyone who’s anyone will be there. A glittering gathering of Hollywood royalty. It’s being given by Prince Brandon, the most eligible and handsome bachelor in the land. Rumor has it he’s seeking the woman of his dreams—his princess bride. He’s my idol. My sigh master. The love of my life. I long to attend, but my chances are nil.

“I’d like to go too,” I plead to my evil stepmother, Enid, already dressed to the nines and hopeful that my stepsister will be the one to marry Prince Brandon.

She rolls her eyes. “Puh-lease. Peasants don’t attend balls.”

Her equally evil and done up daughter Katrina snorts with wicked laughter. “Mommy, she probably couldn’t even find a ball gown to fit her.”

Their words sting me like a hornet. She’s right. I can’t even fit into my beloved late mama’s beautiful vintage dresses. In her haughty voice, Katrina demands that I zip up her coral ball gown. Reluctantly, I do as bid when what I really want to do is rip the dress off her back.

Not even a thank you.

“Now, Zoella, while we’re gone, I want you to mop the floor and polish the furniture,” pouts Enid as she heads toward the front door, arm in arm with her stunning daughter.

I sigh silently. I’m more of servant than a stepdaughter. I’m thanklessly worked to the bone. Expected to tend to their every whim and need. Dear Papa had no clue when he married Enid and left her his two cents.

Their imposing black limo awaits them outside, leaving me behind with Katrina’s sweet little white mutt, Gucci. Weighted with gloom, I sink into the couch. Life’s so not fair. The fluffy pup dances around my feet, licking my ankles in an attempt to cheer me up. With tears in my eyes, I gather him up in my lap.

“Oh, Gooch, it’s futile. They’re right. I’m just a no one.” My tears give way to uncontrollable sobs. I squeeze my eyes shut while my body heaves. I don’t know how long I’ve been crying when Gucci barks madly, hurtling me out of my misery. My eyes blink open and my jaw drops to the floor. Standing before me are two boyishly handsome men dressed alike in flamboyant sequined jumpsuits. Each holds a sparkling wand.

“Who are you?” I gasp.

“We’re your fairy godmothers,” says the slightly taller of the two. “I’m Jeffrey and this is my life partner, Chaz.”

“Wow! I have two fairy godmothers?”

“Double the pleasure. Double the fun,” they reply in unison.

“Now, darling, dry your tears,” says Chaz. “It’s bad for your complexion.”

“And you can’t go to the ball with red eyes,” chimes in Jeffrey.

My eyes grow wide. “I’m going to the ball?”

“That’s the goal here.” Chaz surveys me.

I look down at my sweats and then back at Chaz. “But I have nothing to wear.”

“No worries. I’m a fashion designer by day, a fairy godmother by night.”

Jeffrey glances at his Mickey Mouse watch. “Oh dear, we’re going to have to work fast. Are you ready?”

With a nod, I squeal out an eager “yes.”

“Chaz, do you remember the incantation?” Jeffrey asks his partner.

“Abracadabra?”

Jeffrey rolls his eyes dismissively “No, honey, that’s so last year. It’s bippity-boppity-boo.”

Chaz blushes. “Right.”

I stand as still as a statue while the twosome recite the magic words and wave their glittery wands. On my next breath, I find myself shrouded in a cloud of sparkling fairy dust. And when the dust settles, I’m dressed in the most beautiful ball gown I’ve ever set eyes on. A sexy tulle and lace pouf in a color that’s reminiscent of Prince Brandon’s famous violet eyes. I gasp. “Oh my God, it’s beautiful!” Tears of joy spring to my eyes.

Proud of their handiwork, my two fairy godmothers give me the once over.

“We need to accessorize,” comments Jeffrey.

“Totally.” Reciting another incantation, Chaz waves his magic wand. With a whoosh, he transforms my worn slippers into shimmering glass stilettos and my tears into a breathtaking pair of diamond teardrop earrings.

“Come look at yourself, honey,” says Jeffrey. Taking me by the hand, he leads me to a floor-to-ceiling gold-leaf mirror. I gasp at my reflection. I hardly recognize myself. My hair is done up in a crown of dark curls, and I’m wearing a stunning spaghetti-strap dress that hugs all my curves and compliments my cleavage. I look like a princess! And then my heart sinks.

“Fairy Godmothers, how am I going to get to the ball?” The thought of driving my little Mini-Cooper in this voluminous gown doesn’t sit well. Plus, I’m so anxious I’ll probably get into an accident. Or pee.

“No worries. Where’s your car?” asks Jeffrey. “I’m an event planner by day. I’m a whiz at these things.”

I tell him it’s in the driveway, and on my next inhale, the duo escorts me outside. Wagging his tail, Gooch trails behind us. Jeffrey waves his magic wand over the miniscule white car, and before my stunned eyes, it magically transforms into a majestic Rolls Royce. It’s fit for Hollywood royalty.

“Oh my God,” I mutter under my breath. “It’s outrageous, but there’s no way I can drive that to the ball. I’ll crash it for sure.”

“No worries.” Grinning, Jeffrey recites another incantation over panting Gooch, shrouding him in a pouf of fairy dust. My eyes grow wide again as the little dog magically transforms into an adorable shaggy, white-haired livery.

“Meet your new driver.” Jeffrey beams.

“Shall we, Madame?” says Gooch, gallantly opening the passenger door for me with a sweep of his arm.

Pinch me. This can’t be real. I slip into the car as gracefully as I can while Gooch gets into the driver’s seat.

“Get ready to par-tay,” chants Chaz.

“Enjoy the ball,” chimes in Jeffrey. “But there’s one caveat. At the last stroke of midnight, our spell will be broken. The Rolls will turn back into a Mini, the driver back into a mutt, and you back to a simple servant girl.”

A shiver skitters up my spine, but I’m still grateful for the incredible opportunity they’ve given me. “Fairy Godmothers! How can I ever thank you?”

“Give us hugs and be off. Have fun!” replies Jeffrey with a smile.

“Oh, and give the Prince a kiss from us,” adds in Chaz.