“Penne pasta bake with Italian sausage and garlic bread. Your favorite.” She beams up at him.
I want to vomit. Well, I really want to stuff my face with every delicious morsel of the meal being set out on our table, but I want to do it alone. I want to enjoy my dinner without my mother’s stare.
Sitting down to eat, I prepare for the battle. The glare of my mother’s gaze grips me as I reach for the salad dressing to top my leafy greens. Her reaction is to sigh loudly in her first warning that I am indeed doing something wrong.
A girl my size should eat salad—sure—minus the dressing. I listen to every word she preaches to me time and time again. I have it engrained in my head. It doesn’t mean I have the willpower to resist. I doll up the salad with shredded cheese, chopped egg, croutons, and ranch dressing. Like a lady, I eat my salad first, all under her watch.
The scents of garlic, the look of the pasta bake, and my own craving for carbs have me still starving as I plate my main course.
“Candy, have you no self-control? You’re not getting any younger … or smaller. At fifteen, that’s not baby fat you’re carrying around. Are you sure you need to eat that much?”
So it begins yet again. Just one dinner is all I ask. Can I please have one dinner that I am not under her scrutiny? Breakfast, she doesn’t bother me. She needs her rest for the day ahead of her. Thank the dear queen of good things for that small reprieve. Not that she has such a hard day, being that she doesn’t work. I’m an only child, and our house stays spotless. Whatever she needs to stay out of my way works for me. Lunch, I eat at school. Dinner, though—night in and night out—we must eat as a family. Jones family requirement; everyone must be present at the dinner table. Night in and night out, I must endure my bad food choices. Night in and night out, I sit under her scrutiny while my dad says nothing. His silence is almost as cruel as her words. He must agree if he says not one word, right?
One day, I’ll be out of here. One day, they won’t have to fuss over my eating. One day, it’ll go away.
C HAPTER O NE
~Lance~
Zanne’s isn’t the same anymore. Heath is hanging at the gym tonight to support LoraLeigh, who is teaching her first class as a certified self-defense instructor. After everything she has been through, this is huge for her. I get it, really I do. It still doesn’t make me miss my wingman any less.
Tapper is home with a very pregnant Kenzy. This isn’t his scene anymore. I get that, too. It still doesn’t mean I don’t miss having my boys around.
I grip the long neck bottle a little tighter before bringing the beer to my lips. The cold alcohol runs down my throat as I take a long pull.
The place is slow tonight for Zanne’s. Stepping out from the usual table I share with the guys, I scan the dance floor. Finding a curvy blonde dancing in her group of friends, I make my way over.
With a raise of my bottle to my long time buddy, ‘DJ Drunken Monkey,’ the song changes to a soft R&B. The girls move apart just enough for me to slide in behind the object of my desire tonight. In rhythm with the music, I move in behind her luscious ass. Wrapping my right arm around her waist, I take the lead, pulling her against me. She gasps and looks up at me, and then I smile and continue to move.
When she relaxes against me, I take my left hand holding the beer and press the cold bottle against the curve of her neck. The condensation rolls down the bottle, landing on her exposed skin. Leaning down, I lick the water off the sweet spot of her neck, dragging my teeth as I pull the longneck away. She trembles as the chills run through her.
Pulling her closer, I growl in her ear. We sway, rock, and grind into each other as she melts into me and one song moves into another.
DJ Drunken Monkey gives me a nod before switching to a fast paced techno song; therefore, killing the mood I have worked so hard to build. It sucks, but it’s his business, so he can only keep it low and slow for so long.
Taking my companion by the hand, I lead us off the dance floor and to the bar then guide her to a stool in front of me. I raise my beer up to Juliette, the bartender, and she nods her understanding as she serves the woman in front of her before making her way over to me with another cold one.
“Whatcha havin’ to drink, darlin’?”
“Shirley temple,” she whispers as I take a long pull of my beer.
“No alcohol? Worried much?”
“I don’t plan to be a statistic, pal.”
I smile at her sass. “Pal, huh? In order to be pals, I should probably know your name, darlin’.”
“Well, my name’s not darlin’ or even Darlene.”
“Ouch.” I wink. “For someone so friendly on the dance floor, why the cold shoulder now?”
“Cut the crap. You have no real interest in me. What am I, some bet with your friends? Where are they?” She looks around us dramatically before sighing. “I see, the deal is they have to wait till you get me to agree to leave with you then all get together and laugh as you reject me?”
I raise my eyebrow in question at her.
“Ohhhh … not into humiliating the chunky girl. What? Is this a walk on the wild side for you tonight? Or should I say walk on the fat side? More cushion for the pushin’, ya know.”
Then it dawns on me. Insecurity. Unfortunately, I see this time and time again with women. The past rears its ugly head or the words of some punk ass puts a woman on the defense that a man couldn’t seriously want to seek out a curvy girl.
I reach out and cup her chin to bring her face up to look at me. “I don’t know who put all this negative in your head, but baby, all I see is beauty.” Setting my beer on the bar, I run my hand over her hair, lifting the long, blonde strands to my nose to inhale. “Soft, sweet beauty. From the depth in your blue eyes to the swell of your full breasts to the curve of your ass to the very tips of your toes is soft, sweet beauty.”
She watches me as if she is trying to gauge if I am real. She pulls her face out of my grip to look at her untouched drink like she’s unsure whether it’s spiked.
“Darlin’, you haven’t had a drop. I didn’t drug you. I’m here after a long day of work, alone. Honestly, as gorgeous as you are, I wanna take my time and savor every part of your body. Tonight, I wouldn’t be good enough to you, so baby, I’m not planning to take you home. I just wanna dance with you, get your number, and take you out sometime. No expectations.”
She laughs at me as if she still can’t believe me.
I have been known to have a one-night stand or two, but nothing like Maverick or Heath in the past. My tastes in women are selective. Not just any woman will do. I like my woman to be self-assured. I want her comfortable in her own skin. Soft, sweet beauty, that’s what I want.
Needing her to understand, I lean in and whisper in her ear. “Listen carefully. I like my women to be all woman. I want her curves to be my road map to search out every highway, lane, and back road to treasures hidden. I wanna trace every path to tempt every sweet spot to be found. I don’t need a twig that, as I spread her legs and slam into her, I split her in two. I need a woman who can push back as hard as I push in. I want a woman I can use as a canvas to finger paint a masterpiece in chocolate all over her naked body. I want a woman I can share a meal with and not feel like I’ve fucked up her diet for a month. Like I said, I want my woman to be all woman—soft, sweet beauty.”
She swallows hard as I pull back. “You’re serious.”
“Let’s start with my name is Lance. My friends call me Rush.”
“Rush, huh?” she questions with a smirk.
“Yeah, darlin’, Rush. Take a ride with me, and I’m sure to give you a rush.”