His fingers were gentle, delicate, as they brushed over the place where my throat was sore, where Frankie had choked me. Then he trailed them over the rest of my body. There was nothing sexual about it, despite the fact that his cock was straining toward me. He washed me, cleansed me of not only the dirt and grime that had accumulated on my body, but the emotional weight that I’d carried with me as well.
When the soap was rinsed from both of us, Riley turned off the shower and reached out to grab a towel for me. He tried as best he could to dry me off with one arm, trying so hard to take care of me, even though he was the one with the bullet wound. Once I was able to wrest it from him, he grabbed one for himself, quickly and efficiently drying off.
“Shit, I can’t even wrap a goddamn towel around myself.”
I knew he was frustrated, knew how hard it must be for him not to be able to do everything for himself when he’d done so for so long. But even knowing that, I couldn’t help but chuckle as I stared at his naked backside.
He looked at me over his shoulder, his eyes darting down to take in the towel I’d covered up with. “You find that funny, do you?”
Trying to suppress a smile, I shrugged. “A little.”
Before I could stop him, he reached out and snatched the towel from around my chest, letting it pool at my feet. He mimicked my shrug, then said, “Fair’s fair.”
I didn’t protest, standing in front of him naked as I tended to his wound, getting a clean bandage on him. Once he had a fresh dressing on the wound and he’d slipped one of his shirts over my head, he pulled me into his bed, tucking me into his good side. We lay together, much like we had right before we’d gotten the call from Gage. The call that had set everything in motion. And even though it hadn’t gone ideally, hadn’t gone how any of us had initially planned, I couldn’t regret it. Because Max was dead and Riley was safe and I was in his arms.
We were quiet for a while as Riley ran his hand up and down my arm, his fingers slowing down until eventually they stopped and I knew sleep would come for him any second. Instead of succumbing to it, he asked, “What now?” His voice was heavy, just a whispered breath between us.
Running my hand over his stomach, I said, “Now you need to get some sleep. It’s not every day you get shot.”
He squeezed my hip, turning his head toward mine, his nose nestled in my damp hair as he inhaled deeply. “I don’t mean tonight. I mean tomorrow and the day after and the day after that.” His once-relaxed body was now tight under my caressing hand. “You can do whatever you want. You don’t have to be hidden away as Genevieve anymore.”
I could do anything. Go anywhere. Be anyone. I could move to Phoenix or Portland or stay right here in Chicago. I could utilize the degree I’d gotten and actually do something I liked with my life … I could go into investigative journalism like I’d always wanted.
I could be with Riley.
“Just sleep. Don’t worry about it right now. We can talk about it more tomorrow.”
But as Riley’s breathing evened out, his body going lax, I knew I wouldn’t need till tomorrow to make a decision. Because there wasn’t one to make. There’d never been one to make.
I only wanted to be one place with one person, and while I was there, I wanted to be the version of myself he brought out in me. The version he reminded me I could be.
Thinking about my life in Minneapolis, the one waiting for me, the one I’d set up so perfectly, only filled me with a sense of dread. Because it wasn’t there I wanted to be. It wasn’t Eric’s arm I wanted to be attached to for the rest of my life. My home wasn’t a fancy house, living there while attending fund-raisers and brushing elbows with some of the wealthiest people around.
It was wherever Riley was.
* * *
After Riley’s breaths had evened out enough that I was certain he was asleep, I slipped out from under his arm and crept into the living room, looking for his phone. I found it on the counter by his keys and picked it up. I stared at the small rectangle, thinking about what I was about to do. What making this call would mean. There was no going back after this. No do-overs. If I did this, it was final.
I brushed my thumb up and down the screen, then powered it up. After navigating to the call screen, I took a deep breath as I dialed the number I’d memorized.
Three rings later, a deep voice answered. “Hello?”
I paused, closing my eyes. Then I said, “It’s me.”
“Gen?” Eric asked immediately. “Are you all right? What’s happened?”
I blew out a huff of laughter and shook my head. What hadn’t happened? Since I’d last spoken to Eric, I’d been on a roller coaster, my entire world flipping and spinning and dropping into a free fall. Instead of saying any of that, I settled simply on, “It’s done. We’re not in danger anymore. Riley made sure I was okay.”
“And you’re still not going to tell me what’s going on?”
“I can’t, Eric. I don’t want you involved any more than you absolutely have to be. I never wanted you to get caught up in the crossfire, and it’s safer if you don’t know any details, even if I don’t have any reason to believe it’d ever come back to haunt either of us. I just want to keep you as safe as I can.”
He hummed in acknowledgment, then was quiet for a moment before he asked, “Is this good-bye then?”
“Eric…”
“No, Gen, don’t. Don’t feel guilty. Is this what you want? Is Riley the life you want?”
Without hesitation, I answered, “Yes.”
“Then that’s all I need to know—that this is what you want. That he’s what you want. I’d never want to keep you from that. I just want you to be happy.”
“I want you to be happy, too.” My voice was wobbly when I said it, but this was breaking my heart. Eric had been my only friend for so long. And he had been a friend. My best friend, one who may not have known the true person I was, but who accepted the bits I’d shown him.
He sighed heavily, and I could picture him in his fancy hotel suite in London, pacing the floor with his hand in the pocket of his suit pants. Looking like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. “Me, too. And I’m working on it. Figured if you can be brave, maybe I can, too.”
I smiled at that, his words warming my heart. Then I thought about everything that was paid for and in place: the wedding dress that I’d already purchased, the vendors who’d already been paid, the reception hall that had already been reserved. And he was going to have to deal with it entirely on his own. “What’ll you tell your parents?”
“Don’t worry about that. I’ll figure it out. You just focus on yourself, okay?”
I swallowed the lump that was suddenly filling my throat. I tried to stop my voice from quavering, but didn’t quite manage. “Will I talk to you again?”
“If you want to.”
“I do.”
“Then we will. Whenever you want. You know how to reach me, Gen.”
I was quiet for a moment, then I said good-bye once and for all to the manufactured me. The one who hid from her troubles instead of facing them. “It’s actually Evie.”
He hummed, and I could hear the smile in his voice. “Suits you.”
I smiled at that, feeling lighter than I had in longer than I could remember. “I’ll talk to you soon, Eric.”
“Good-bye, Evie.”
I hung up and placed Riley’s phone back on the counter, then walked down the hall and into his bedroom. He was still sound asleep on his back, his head turned to where I’d been lying before I’d slipped out. I crawled onto the bed and slid under the covers, tucking myself up against his side. As soon as I was close enough, his arm settled around me, holding me tightly to him. He dipped his head until his lips rested against my forehead. I felt his mouth move against my skin as he breathed, “Stay with me.”
I ran my hands over his smooth skin, tracing the parts of him I’d memorized so long ago. He was my past, the tiny flicker of light in a sea of darkness. He was my present, when everything was jumbled and uncertain, but where I’d be able to figure it out if I was with him. And I knew, with utter certainty, he was my future.