Why are matters of the heart always so damn complicated?

It appeared that both Rebecca and I had bad taste in men, and that we fell for the wrong guy.

“Ha ha. Believe it or not, I don’t have a lot of girlfriends. I’m always either studying or working or reading. I was never part of the in crowd at school or at university.”

“That’s funny, because if it weren’t for my two sisters, I'd also be stranded without friends. What about Cousin Lexi? I know we’ve never been close, but I’d love to see her, too. Can you invite her along?”

“Sure, I will. Lexi is always nagging me to go out. She’ll be so happy to take both of us to her hangouts. I’ll let her suggest where we should go. Is that OK with you?”

Rebecca laughed. “Of course. Why not? If she knows LA better than both of us, she can take us to a club where we can just have fun. God, I haven’t done that for so long. It will be awesome just to go a little wild.”

“Go wild, you say? Right.” I laughed. My idea of a fun night out was movies and popcorn, and back in bed by ten so I could read before going to sleep.

“Dammit, Jade, we’re young, and not too shabby looking. It’s time we have an evening out on the town. Get a super sexy outfit; we’re going to dress to kill, and have a night out that will make history!”

I sighed. Rebecca was beautiful, with her long auburn hair and stunning body. Most men couldn’t keep their eyes off her. No wonder she had her boss pining after her. As for the Frenchman—Alain was a damn fool . . .

Lexi. Well, she was . . . interesting. She had a banging tight body, and the same beautiful lily-white skin as Rebecca and I. But Lexi was different—she wasn’t afraid of her sexuality, or to show off her assets. She changed the color of her hair like other women changed lipsticks. But the weird thing was, regardless of whether she had dark or blond hair she was stunningly beautiful.

Once I’d finished taking to Rebecca, I rang Lexi and told her about our Australian cousin’s visit to LA. We hadn’t spoken since that night Ratbag had smuggled me out of the compound, and she’d stayed behind. I still wondered about her motives for staying. What man had she set her sights on? I hoped it was Razor or Ox, because Ryder was already taken.

And then I remembered. He’d left me, because he didn't love me.

But that didn’t stop me from thinking about him, yearning for him, missing him.

Or loving him. Damn.

Chapter 25 ~ Ryder

Two things brought me back to LA sooner than I’d wanted. The first was a call from Max, reminding me that his woman was coming to LA, and that I'd promised to look out for her. He expected me to do some low-profile stalking, ensuring her safety.

Was he also worried that there may be another man in Rebecca’s life? I’d heard about the French man she was seeing while she’d been in France, but as far as I knew it was over between them. Maybe Max was worried that he’d try to contact Rebecca on neutral ground? Whatever his reasons were, he was adamant that I had to follow her and be her unknown bodyguard at all times. Fuck, I really wasn’t in the mood to babysit anyone, but he was so persuasive that before I knew it, I’d promised to do everything he asked.

The second thing that brought me back prematurely was a call from a man who wanted to meet with me as soon as possible. It had something to do with Marianne. Fuck, I’d nearly fallen off my chair when he’d mentioned her name. He wouldn’t tell me anything more, so I agreed to meet him. I was curious as all hell. Why had this happened now, just when I’d finally stated making progress by thinking less of hating my mother?

If I was totally honest, the third thing that brought me home was my longing for Jade. Just being in the same city would be enough for me at this point. Fuck, I missed the shit out of her, even her snarky ways, her witty comebacks, the way she scrunched her nose when she was deep in thought. Yeah, I missed everything about her, so much it hurt. But I’d chosen this path, so I had to fucking suck it up.

However, I did plan on doing some stalking of my very own. I’d be her shadow, and even if she didn't know it, I’d watch over her. Protect her and keep her safe.

My discussions with the Northern Commando MC hadn’t gone as well as I’d hoped. I was pretty skilled in negotiating, yet we couldn’t reach a compromise that would benefit both parties. The motherfuckers were cagey, and wanted more reassurances than I was able to provide to get the deal back on track.

Cobra was raging mad when I called him and told him about their terms and conditions. He shouted down the phone at me, unhappy that I couldn’t smooth things over. But what shook me to the core was when he asked me if my heart had been in the negotiations. I couldn’t give him a straight answer, because I fucking knew it wasn’t. Fuck, I was letting the club and my pres down. That didn't sit well with me.

The Scorpio Stinger MC had always come first in my life; my brothers were my family. And now that had all changed. My thoughts were constantly turning around a beautiful golden-haired woman who’d cast a spell on me.

No amount of wind in my hair or distance on my bike could rid my mind of her. The faster and more reckless I became on the road, and the wider Ratbag’s eyes grew, the more I yearned for my Princess bitch. My cock fucking ached for her at night, dying to be buried inside her sweet pussy.

I could only laugh at myself now. How I‘d thought running away would help, I had no idea. But I’d tried. It was funny as fuck.

Ratbag thought I’d completely lost my mind when I started laughing uncontrollably for no apparent reason, because it finally dawned on me. No matter how much physical distance was between us, she was always right there with me, wherever I went, because she was in my fucking mind and in my fucking heart.

I could run, I could be in denial, but I couldn’t hide from my true feelings.

Chapter 26 ~ Ryder

The man standing in front of me was a mirror image of myself, just older. It was like traveling into the future and seeing what I would look like when I was about thirty years older.

“Ryder? Ryder Knox?” Fuck, even his deep baritone voice sounded like mine.

Scrunching my eyes up, I stared at him, trying my fucking best not to gape. Who the fuck is this man?

I kept my voice even, hiding my alarm. “Yeah?”

“Christ. You look just like me. It’s like looking in a fucking mirror thirty years ago.” We even thought the same. He shook his head, visibly rattled. His skin was ashen grey, his lips drawn into a thin line. Even the way he stood, fists clenched, legs slightly apart, was a mirror image of myself right at this very moment.

“So—who the fuck are you?” I growled. This shit was shaking me up, and I had no idea why this man was looking for me.

“Listen, Ryder. I need a drink. A stiff one. Can we go somewhere to talk?”

I nodded my head. Fuck, I needed more than a stiff drink. I needed to sit as well. For the first time in years, my legs were wobbly as hell. Whatever was going on here would affect my life profoundly.

“Yeah. There is a bar across the road. Let’s go there.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t introduce myself. I never thought I’d react like this. I was expecting this, but fuck me, it’s more bizarre than I thought.” He hesitated for a beat, scrubbing his face. A fine layer of perspiration covered his brow.

He extended his hand. “My name is Bill.”

I took his hand, looking him in the eyes as I shook it. “You have a last name, Bill?”

“Yeah. It’s Ryder. William Ryder.”

He could have kicked me in the nuts, and it would’ve had less of a punch to it. “Who the fuck are you?” I hissed. It was no fucking coincidence that we looked alike, and had the same name. And he’d said on the phone that he knew Marianne. That was the only reason I’d agreed to meet him in the first place.