FORD Well, I promised you a dinner. Come, come, walk in the park. I pray you pardon me. I will hereafter make known to you why I have done this.—Come, wife; come, Mistress Page. I pray you pardon me. Pray heartily pardon me.

PAGE (to Caius and Evans) Let’s go in, gentlemen. (Aside to them) But trust me, we’ll mock him. (To Ford, Caius, and Evans) I do invite you tomorrow morning to my house to breakfast. After, we’ll a-birding together. I have a fine hawk for the bush. Shall it be so?

FORD Anything.

EVANS If there is one, I shall make two in the company.

CAIUS If there be one or two, I shall make-a the turd.

FORD Pray you go, Master Page.

Exeunt fall but Evans and Caius⌉

EVANS I pray you now, remembrance tomorrow on the lousy knave mine Host.

CAIUS Dat is good, by Gar; with all my heart.

EVANS A lousy knave, to have his gibes and his mockeries.

Exeunt

3.4 Enter Master Fenton and Anne Page

FENTON

I see I cannot get thy father’s love;

Therefore no more turn me to him, sweet Nan.

ANNE

Alas, how then?

FENTON Why, thou must be thyself.

He doth object I am too great of birth,

And that, my state being galled with my expense,

I seek to heal it only by his wealth.

Besides these, other bars he lays before me—

My riots past, my wild societies;

And tells me ’tis a thing impossible

I should love thee but as a property.

ANNE Maybe he tells you true.

⌈FENTON⌉

No, heaven so speed me in my time to come!

Albeit I will confess thy father’s wealth

Was the first motive that I wooed thee, Anne,

Yet, wooing thee, I found thee of more value

Than stamps in gold or sums in sealèd bags;

And ’tis the very riches of thyself

That now I aim at.

ANNE Gentle Master Fenton,

Yet seek my father’s love, still seek it, sir.

If opportunity and humblest suit

Cannot attain it, why then—

Enter Justice Shallow, Master Slender ⌈richly dressedl, and Mistress Quickly

Hark you hither.

They talk apart

SHALLOW Break their talk, Mistress Quickly. My kinsman shall speak for himself.

SLENDER I’ll make a shaft or a bolt on’t. ’Slid, ’tis but venturing.

SHALLOW

Be not dismayed.

SLENDER No, she shall not dismay me.

I care not for that, but that I am afeard.

MISTRESS QUICKLY (to Anne) Hark ye, Master Slender would speak a word with you.

ANNE

I come to him. (To Fenton) This is my father’s choice.

O, what a world of vile ill-favoured faults

Looks handsome in three hundred pounds a year I

MISTRESS QUICKLY And how does good Master Fenton?

Pray you, a word with you.

She draws Fenton aside

SHALLOW She’s coming. To her, coz! O boy, thou hadst a father!

SLENDER I had a father, Mistress Anne; my uncle can tell you good jests of him.—Pray you, uncle, tell Mistress Anne the jest how my father stole two geese out of a pen, good uncle.

SHALLOW Mistress Anne, my cousin loves you.

SLENDER Ay, that I do, as well as I love any woman in Gloucestershire.

SHALLOW He will maintain you like a gentlewoman.

SLENDER Ay, by God, that I will, come cut and long-tail, under the degree of a squire.

SHALLOW He will make you a hundred and fifty pounds jointure.

ANNE Good Master Shallow, let him woo for himself.

SHALLOW Marry, I thank you for it, I thank you for that good comfort.—She calls you, coz. I’ll leave you.

He stands aside

ANNE Now, Master Slender.

SLENDER Now, good Mistress Anne.

ANNE What is your will?

SLENDER My will? ‘Od’s heartlings, that’s a pretty jest indeed! I ne’er made my will yet, I thank God; I am not such a sickly creature, I give God praise.

ANNE I mean, Master Slender, what would you with me?

SLENDER Truly, for mine own part, I would little or nothing with you. Your father and my uncle hath made motions. If it be my luck, so. If not, happy man be his dole. They can tell you how things go better than I can.

Enter Master Page and Mistress Page

You may ask your father: here he comes.

PAGE

Now, Master Stender.—Love him, daughter Anne.—

Why, how now? What does Master Fenton here?

You wrong me, sir, thus still to haunt my house.

I told you, sir, my daughter is disposed of.

FENTON

Nay, Master Page, be not impatient.

MISTRESS PAGE

Good Master Fenton, come not to my child.

PAGE She is no match for you.

FENTON Sir, will you hear me?

PAGE No, good Master Penton.—

Come, Master Shallow; come, son Slender, in.—

Knowing my mind, you wrong me, Master Fenton.

Exeunt Page, Shallow, and Slender

MISTRESS QUICKLY (to Fenton) Speak to Mistress Page.

FENTON

Good Mistress Page, for that I love your daughter

In such a righteous fashion as I do,

Perforce against all checks, rebukes, and manners

I must advance the colours of my love,

And not retire. Let me have your good will.

ANNE Good mother, do not marry me to yon fool.

MISTRESS PAGE I mean it not; I seek you a better husband.

MISTRESS QUICKLY ⌈aside to Anne⌉ That’s my master, Master Doctor.

ANNE

Alas, I had rather be set quick i’th’ earth

And bowled to death with turnips.

MISTRESS PAGE

Come, trouble not yourself, good Master Fenton.

I will not be your friend nor enemy.

My daughter will I question how she loves you,

And as I find her, so am I affected.

Till then, farewell, sir. She must needs go in.

Her father will be angry.

FENTON

Farewell, gentle mistress.—Farewell, Nan.

Exeunt Mistress Page and Anne

MISTRESS QUICKLY This is my doing now. ‘Nay’, said I, ‘will you cast away your child on a fool and a physician? Look on Master Fenton.’ This is my doing.

FENTON

I thank thee, (giving her a ring) and I pray thee, once

tonight

Give my sweet Nan this ring. (Giving money) There’s

for thy pains.

MISTRESS QUICKLY Now heaven send thee good fortune!

Exit Fenton

A kind heart he hath. A woman would run through fire and water for such a kind heart. But yet I would my master had Mistress Anne; or I would Master Slender had her; or, in sooth, I would Master Fenton had her. I will do what I can for them all three, for so I have promised, and I’ll be as good as my word—but speciously for Master Fenton. Well, I must of another errand to Sir John Falstaff from my two mistresses. What a beast am I to slack it! Exit