My heart is cracked and broken, but yours is frozen through.”

As the song ended, judgment was cast simultaneously in thousands of minds. Some applauded while others were just glad to be able to socialize again, but there was enough clapping that Allison rushed back to Ben’s side, took his hand and raised it. Tim was momentarily forgotten as they bowed together and made their exit.

Ben didn’t look back. He was through chasing someone who lived a lie. Off to the side of the stage, a group of teachers took notes, acting as judges. Ms. Hughes was one of them, and when her eyes met Ben’s, there was understanding there. Love isn’t meant to be hidden away. Life is too short for shame.

* * * * *

They took second place in the talent show. First place was stolen away by the cheerleaders. The male students made sure they got the audience vote, and most of the teachers bought into the school spirit. Both Ben and Allison were happy they had at least beaten the Super Fartio Brothers. They graciously accepted their $50 gift certificates to a local mall and used them that weekend to buy summer clothes.

Prom followed a week later. Allison went with Ronnie, and Ben wasn’t the least surprised when she told him that Tim was there with Krista Norman. He tried not to let it get to him. After all, he’d had his own date that night. While he didn’t go to the actual prom, he and Evan from work had gone out to dinner. It wasn’t until Evan dropped him off at home and clumsily kissed Ben that it officially became a date.

Ben had mixed feelings about this. Evan was attractive and fun to be around, even though he was a little on the feminine side. Had Ben met him a year ago, he probably would have pursued him with enthusiasm. Now he found his thoughts kept turning to Tim every time he and Evan were together. When they held hands at the movies on their second date, Ben couldn’t help but compare the feeling of Evan’s hand to Tim’s.

He questioned too the wisdom of his choice. Evan was still in the closet, at school and to his parents at least. The only difference was that he accepted who he was. This still wasn’t enough for Ben, but as the school year ended, the summer days seemed twice as empty without Tim and Ben found himself seeing Evan outside of work more often.

In the middle of June, they slept together for the first time, a stark contrast to what Ben had known with Tim. Evan was passive and inexperienced. This wasn’t too much of a problem, but the absence of emotion left Ben feeling he was only going through the motions. Sex still felt good, but without love it was little more than assisted masturbation. He broke up with Evan the next day. Evan took it well, saying that he knew he was just a rebound. Ben couldn’t have disagreed more. He hadn’t rebounded from anything. In fact, he now felt he would never get over Tim.

Ben quit his job at Zounders the next week and left without saying goodbye to Evan. A few weeks later he found a new job at a little frozen yogurt store in the same strip mall. The tediously simple work left him free to think, for better or worse. On the good days Allison came to keep him company. The worst days were when it rained and demand for a cool treat was minimal. On these days Ben would often leave work, closing up the shop hours earlier than he was supposed to.

On one such day the rain ceased just as he was locking the door. He decided to leave anyway and to walk home along the winding bike paths. He enjoyed catching glimpses into various backyards, imagining the lives that ran their courses inside the homes and creating different family histories in his mind. He was in the midst of one such daydream when he was rudely awakened by a familiar voice.

“Well, well. If it isn’t the village faggot!”

Ben looked up at the approaching figure of Bryce Hunter. He was flanked by two others. One was a spiky-haired guy Ben had never seen before. His heart sank when he saw the other was Tim.

“What are you doing out here?” Bryce taunted, blocking his way as Ben tried to pass. “Looking for some cock to suck?”

“You’ll have to pull your skanky girlfriend off of the football team if you want that,” Ben retorted. “I’m definitely not interested.”

Bryce grabbed Ben by the embarrassing green polo shirt that he was required to wear to work. “What did you say?” He yanked Ben closer with an audible tearing noise.

“Leave him alone,” Tim said, pushing past the other guy.

“He called my girlfriend a slut!” Bryce said, not taking his attention off his victim.

“Technically I said she was skanky,” Ben corrected, angry at being exposed to such an ignorant primate when he wasn’t in school. “She’s also a brain-dead snob, but I guess that’s your common bond, isn’t it?”

Bryce released Ben and cocked his arm back, the fat slab of his fist ready to make contact with Ben’s face. Before it could, Tim was between them, pushing Bryce away and restraining him.

“What the fuck?” Bryce demanded.

“Forget him,” Tim said. “Let’s just go.”

Tim was strong, but Bryce was built like an ox. He had no trouble in pushing Tim away, his fury at being denied making him twice as dangerous. His fist cracked across Ben’s face, sending him tumbling to the ground like a rag doll.

Lights flashed before Ben’s eyes as he reeled from the blow and tried to escape any that followed. He managed to prop himself up on his elbows before dizziness caused him to slump back down. He took a couple of deep breaths, surprised that he wasn’t being kicked while he was down, and managed to roll over and push up onto his knees.

The sound of a struggle erupted behind him. He glanced backward, and saw Tim and Bryce punching each other. Tim’s nose was dripping blood, but he was holding up well against the mammoth he was facing. He took a couple of punches to his right eye before felling Bryce with a swinging blow to the temple. As the giant groaned and hit the ground, Tim pounced on him like a tiger.

“Get off my cousin!” yelled the spiky-haired guy as he headed meaningfully for Tim. Tim wouldn’t see it coming though, not with his back to the oncoming aggressor.

Ben’s mind focused. He was on his feet within seconds and running toward Bryce’s cousin. Ben ploughed into his side, making the cousin trip, but he recovered and with surprising speed turned to elbow Ben in the face, knocking him down again.

Ben wasn’t as dazed this time. He looked up to find a crotch directly in front of him and punched it with his fist, managing to land two hits before the other guy stumbled backwards. Ben capitalized on his temporary advantage, punching, kicking, screaming, all in a wild violent blur until his adrenaline receded like the tide, and he found himself and Tim standing over two groaning, balled-up forms.

“Run,” Tim said when it became clear that Bryce intended to get up again.

They took off down the path, heading instinctively toward their homes. As they neared, Ben was surprised that Tim led them not to his own house, but to the Bentley’s. They stood in the driveway, panting to catch their breath between bursts of laughter. Both of them looked terrible, faces covered in blood with swollen red blotches that promised of bruises to come.

“Thanks,” Ben gasped when he could talk again.

“You and your big mouth,” Tim said with a grin, shaking his head.

For the briefest moment, everything was good again, as if nothing had ever gone wrong between them. “Do you want to come inside?” Ben asked.

Tim started to nod, his eyes smiling in acquiesce before something clicked. His face became somber, eyes distant. “Goodbye, Benjamin.”

As Ben watched him leave, he knew there was no longer any point in trying to stop him.

* * * * *

There remained one possibility, one iota of hope in the form of a key. The idea kept Ben awake at night, tormenting him with promises he knew were impossible, but still it whispered to him, urging him to try. Where words fail, only action can succeed.