Her jaw tightened, and anyone in their right mind would’ve backed off with that wild look in her eyes, but I didn’t care anymore. I was as good as dead anyway, and when that happened, I couldn’t think of anything worse than Lila running away again and abandoning all of the people who counted on her.
“You’re no better than my mother,” she said, her eyes watering. “Not everyone’s prepared to die for the greater good, all right? We can’t all be heroes. I do my part down there, and no one has to know. I had no idea they were going to have someone Masked, and I’m sorry they put you through that, but that isn’t my fault. I thought if everyone believed I was dead, it would have made me a martyr. I thought it would fuel the rebellion. They know I’m alive now, though—the entire world does, and they also know their leader abandoned them and kidnapped Greyson. Some of them love him as much as they love me, you know. Do you really think they’re going to be happy about this?”
“Wait,” I cut in, my head spinning with everything she wasn’t saying. “Who do you mean by they?”
Lila rolled her eyes. “They had you giving speeches and everything, and they didn’t tell you?”
“Didn’t tell me what?” I said, looking at Knox over Lila’s shoulder. He focused on the carpet, not meeting my eye. “Knox?”
“Celia thought it best if we kept you in the dark as much as possible,” he said. “We didn’t know you, and this isn’t something you shout from the rooftops.”
Lila snorted and rubbed her cheeks with her sleeves. “What he’s trying to tell you is that my mother is the head of the Blackcoats, and he’s her first lieutenant.”
Silence filled the room, and I stood there dumbly, my mind racing. It made sense, didn’t it? With how much Celia hated her family, what they’d done to her, her attempt to kill Daxton—I didn’t know enough about the Blackcoats to decide if I’d been an idiot for missing it or not, but with the way Lila stared at me, I felt like one.
This went way beyond sibling rivalry between Celia and Daxton.
I took a deep breath, trying to make sense of the knot of words on the tip of my tongue. “So those bombings—all those people dying—”
“I didn’t mean it, okay?” said Lila, her eyes overflowing again. “My mother never goes into the bunkers, so Knox decided he could hide me in one close by. He told the other lieutenants to keep their mouths shut, and I didn’t know that this would happen.” She sniffed and looked at Knox. “Mother won’t be happy when she finds out you hid me, you know.”
He ran his fingers through his hair. “Do you really have to tell her, Lila? Everyone has enough to worry about already. I’d rather not have to worry about Celia killing me, as well.”
“You make sure I get to crawl back under my rock, and you won’t have to worry about it.”
“He already promised he’d help you,” I said. “You don’t need to blackmail him into it.”
She smiled ruefully. “Haven’t you heard? It’s our family’s way of saying ‘I love you.’”
“Lila,” said Knox sharply, and she gave him a withering look. He turned back to me. “Kitty, I’m sorry we didn’t tell you, but—”
“You lied to me,” I said. “You told me you had nothing to do with this before Lila died.”
“You did?” said Lila, eyebrow raised.
Knox opened and shut his mouth. “I—”
Without warning, the door burst open, and Augusta marched into the suite. I paled. Had she been listening?
If she had, her expression didn’t show it. Instead she clasped her hands together and looked down her nose at the three of us. “Good, you’re all up. Get dressed. We’ve received word from Celia, and we’re making the trade at dawn.”
Lila swore under her breath and stormed back into the bedroom. I stood motionless, and Augusta raised one perfectly arched eyebrow.
“You, too, Kitty.”
My insides clenched uncomfortably. “I thought you were trading Lila for Greyson,” I said, my throat like sandpaper.
“We are.”
“Then I’m not going,” I said. “You have Lila. You don’t need me.”
Augusta took a step toward me, and with monumental effort, I stood my ground. “I thought you might be difficult, which is why I have another deal for you. You can take it or leave it, but know that I do not bluff.”
“What, going to offer me my freedom if I do this one last thing for you? I know what freedom means, and I’m not interested in being sent Elsewhere.”
“What about your dear friend?” said Augusta. “Benjy, is it?”
My blood turned to ice. “You can’t.”
“I already have. Benjy has been taken to a secure location, and he will be released following the exchange. Whether he continues to work for Lennox or is sent Elsewhere all depends on your willingness to participate.”
Cold rage spilled through me, spreading from the tips of my fingers to my toes until I was numb with fury. I’d let them get away with destroying my life and stripping me of my identity, but if Augusta sent Benjy Elsewhere—
No. It wasn’t going to happen. Even if it meant stepping in front of whatever bullet was coming my way and smiling when it hit me, if it gave Benjy the life he deserved, I would do it.
“Do we have an accord?” said Augusta, and I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. “Very good. Now do as I say and meet us downstairs in five minutes. Knox, I trust you will see they make it on time.”
“Of course,” he said, and with that Augusta left. As soon as the door closed behind her, Knox touched my arm. “Whatever this is, Kitty, I won’t let anything happen to him.”
I shrugged his hand off and walked away. “You already have.”
Knox wasn’t allowed to come with us. The helicopter waiting behind the mansion only seated five passengers: Augusta, Lila, me, and two guards. As we lifted off the ground, I pressed my forehead against the window and watched Knox grow smaller as he raised his hand in a silent goodbye.
I didn’t return it. It wasn’t his fault that Benjy was in danger, but he was the one who’d come up with this stupid plan in the first place, and if anything happened to Benjy, I would never forgive him.
The helicopter soared over the city, and I stared down at the unfamiliar buildings. From the street I was sure I would have recognized them, but from the sky, they looked foreign. For a moment I closed my eyes and tried to imagine what my life would have been like if I’d gotten a IV. I wouldn’t have stolen that orange or had to leave the city and Benjy behind; I would never have followed Tabs to the brothel; and Daxton would never have gotten his slimy hands on me. If only I’d done better on the test, my life would have been unrecognizable, and Benjy would have been safe as a VI in a government building somewhere far away from Augusta.
I spent most of the trip trying to figure out what she was planning. Five passengers meant one of us wouldn’t be returning, and somehow I didn’t think it would be a guard. Maybe she intended to keep her bargain with Celia, and I would be the one sitting next to Greyson on the way back. Or maybe she was going to kill me and blame it on Celia so Lila would be on the flight home. I bit my lip and pictured a reporter talking about the heroic death of Lila’s body double, protecting her from harm. Maybe they would make up an elaborate story about how I’d jumped in front of Celia’s bullet. Maybe I would even get a funeral.
The helicopter touched down in a clearing surrounded by mountains. The sky was the kind of gray that announced the approaching dawn, and this high up, there was already a swirl of snow in the wind. I drew my coat tighter around my body, but it didn’t help keep out the biting cold.
“You’re sure this is it?” said Lila as we stood together beside the helicopter. It blocked out the wind from one side, but it was still freezing. I shivered and slipped my hands inside my sleeves, but when I glanced at Lila, the cold didn’t seem to bother her.