A very sexy, handsome babysitter. Still…

“Hey, I was thinking…” I start to pull away from him, and his arm instinctively tightens around my shoulders, then drops to his side.

“What’s wrong?” He has to shout to be heard over the music and general hubbub.

“Nothing’s wrong.” I smile at him, study his beautiful face in the flickering light of the torches. “I thought I’d just go say hi to the girls and find you later. Give you a breather.”

“I don’t need a breather from you, Embers.”

A knot forms in my throat. He keeps saying such sweet things, keeps catching me off guard.

“Just for a while. Need to do this.”

He seems about to say something, then thinks better of it and nods instead. A faint smile touches his lips, my favorite one that lights up his eyes.

Before I go, though, he leans in and drops a soft, sweet kiss on my mouth. “Come back whenever you like,” he whispers, and my heart does a wild little flip of joy.

“I will.”

Wandering away from him is harder than I thought, but I force myself not to look back. Just an hour, Amber, come on.

I push my way through a group of giggling girls, searching for my friends, and for one fleeting, horrible second I think I see Nick from the corner of my eye.

My breath freezes in my lungs. I stop in my tracks, trying to locate him again, but he’s gone. Or I imagined him. Oh God, I probably did. Wouldn’t be the first time. I used to see him everywhere for a while, back then.

What would he be doing here anyway?

And where are my friends? So many people. It’s as if they sprouted from the tiled floor. I swear the wedding was a much smaller affair. Which makes sense, I guess, but it’s only sinking in now, as I wander, lost, bumping into people, fast working myself into a panic.

I rub at the leather band on my wrist and suck in a deep breath.

The crowd parts a little toward the end of the pool, and I see familiar faces at last. Zane’s blue Mohawk is like a flashing road sign, and not far from him, I spot Micah and Ev. I open my mouth to call her name, but they seem to be having a serious conversation, judging from their frowning faces.

Uh-oh. Not a good time.

I backpedal before they notice me. Kayla is nowhere to be seen, and Zane and Dakota are heading off, toward the buffet, together with Dylan and his little brothers.

Maybe eating something isn’t a bad idea. I should ask Jesse if he’d like to join me. I retrace my steps, hurrying back along the pool to its other end, pushing against the flow.

Yeah, so I didn’t even make it for fifteen minutes on my own. But truth is, I am hungry. Starving. Couldn’t eat all day from the nerves, and the smells coming from the back of the garden are mouthwatering. My stomach is growling like a beast from hell.

Hey, he did say I could go back to him whenever I wanted, right? And although I’ve only been away from him only a moment, I find a spring in my step and a lightness in my heart as I walk back toward him.

You got it bad, girl.

But I can’t keep from smiling as I wade through a cluster of laughing guys who are waving beer bottles and smoking what I only hope is tobacco—in search of JJ.

And I find him.

Only, something’s wrong with the picture. My mind refuses to process what my eyes are seeing, and I stop so abruptly the momentum carries me forward one more step.

Jesse is kissing a girl. Her hands are on his shoulders and her mouth on his, and I can’t… can’t breathe. Can’t speak.

Can’t frigging think.

My hands are shaking. The tremor spreads to my arms.

I should have expected this. Why didn’t I expect this? Everyone warned me, everyone. People don’t change just like that, from one woman to the next. A manwhore won’t change his ways for me.

I was only gone fifteen minutes…

Turning away blindly, I make for the garden gate. I can’t get out of here fast enough. My heart hurts. It’s cracking, shattering.

Stupid, Amber. That was so stupid of you, to fall for him.

I think I hear him calling my name, and I start to run, my sandals clacking on the paved floor. I duck under arms, squeeze between people in my rush to get out of there. Disoriented, I slow down and glance around.

There. The gate.

A moment later I’m out on the street, calling a cab. I’m lucky, there’s one in the vicinity. I walk further down the road while waiting, and as I hear a commotion at the gate, and my name being called once more, I climb into the cab and speed away.

If only fixing my heart could be so simple.

PART III

My name’s Jesse Lee, not Jesse James, but the famous outlaw and I seem to have lots in common. I’m not a train robber by any stretch, but I know what it’s like to be poor. I’m not a gang leader, but I’ve lived on the dirty streets for years. I’m no murderer, but by the looks some people give me, I might as well be. I’m always on the run, always on the move, never sprouting roots, always drifting, like my namesake.

He’s dead, and I’m alive, but I might as well be dead and buried in his grave. I might as well be him—because if I said I wanted to stop running, that I want a home and a girl to love and hold, nobody would believe me.

Wanna bet?

~ Jesse

Chapter Eighteen

Jesse

Holy shit. I try to push Cassie off me without hurting her, but she’s holding on to me like she’s drowning and I’m a lifesaver. What the fuck’s up with this girl? I don’t want to kiss her. I don’t like her, she tastes wrong, and besides…

Don’t want to kiss any girl but Amber.

I growl, finally shaking her hold off me and wiping my mouth with the back of my hand. “What the hell’s wrong with you, huh?”

“Don’t pretend you didn’t want it, Jesse Lee.” She has her hands on her hips, blue eyes flashing, and hell, she’d be sexy, she’d be hot if…

If I was interested. Which I’m not. “Stay away from me. I’m not…”

Was that Amber? I thought I saw her, eyes wide and dark, face white, mouth open. I thought I saw her turn on her heels and run.

“Amber?” I turn to go after her.

Cassie grabs my hand. “Jesse, wait. Do you really want to do this?”

I still. Cold fury spreads in my chest, in my face, until it feels numb. “Let. Go.” I look pointedly at her hand on mine. “Now.”

Her brows shoot up and some color leaves her face. “Okay.” She draws her hand back, curls it into a fist. “But you must see it. She’s not like you. She’s taking this seriously. I’m doing you a favor, Jesse.”

“Fuck you.” If she was a guy, I’d have punched her, but she’s a chick, dammit. “Stay out of my life, and don’t you ever fucking touch me again, got it?”

I run after Amber. I’ll explain this to her. She’ll understand. She has to know I wouldn’t do this to her. That I wouldn’t do this at all, not since her.

Why did she run? Fuck, she doesn’t believe I initiated the kiss, did she? Not after I told her I never kissed anyone before her. That I want to be with her.

But the cold feeling in my gut tells me she does believe it’s my fault.

Shocker, I know. With my history, why would she trust me? But it smarts.

I shove people aside, their curses following me as I look for her frantically. Where did she go?

Amber. I thought she saw me, that she had faith in me. More faith than I have in myself. And now I can’t see her anywhere. She hasn’t left the reception, right?

Right?

Oh fuck.

I start running flat out as soon as the crowd thins a little, heading out. I pound out onto the street and glance right and left. Where are you, Embers?

A glitter to my left has me running that way before I even get a good look. It’s her all right, her silver dress catching the light of a street lamp. But a cab overtakes me and stops in front of her. She opens the door and climbs inside.