I wrap my arms around myself, turn from the window I had been blindly looking out of, and move to the bed. I’ve spent the last hour or so locked away with my thoughts. Kole had kept silent during our drive, but he let me know in no uncertain terms that he would not allow me to go to a hotel. He’s given me my space since arriving at his house, but I’m not sure how long that will last. Kole, like his brother, has too great of a protective instinct.
I knew Kane had been keeping something from me. Heck, he admitted it. But I let it go because I understood he planned to tell me and I assumed that he would once we arrived. I might not understand why he couldn’t have just called Mia and taken care of this before we came, but I figured it had a lot to do with him worrying that I wouldn’t be able to handle their secret.
That I would run.
And I basically proved him right.
No. You can’t think like that, Willow. You left because you had to. You left because he wouldn’t tell you even when faced with losing you. You left because you’re stronger.
But am I?
Did leaving mean that I was strong or does that make me weak because I didn’t want to face what was being thrown right in front of me. Or an even better question, if I’m able to forgive Kane and move forward, will I be strong enough to deal with what I can only guess will get worse before it gets better when it comes to the public perception of me—us—everything.
I knew that when our relationship was officially thrust into the spotlight, there would be many eyes on me. The fear of what they would think, the things they would say, and worst of all—the scorn that would come just by being with him … it had been at the forefront of my mind daily.
But I believed that together we would be able to get through it. I had no illusions that it wouldn’t be without struggles, but I still believed. But I’m not just facing public scorn for being with Kane, taking him off the market, and what many will feel is with someone not worthy of him. Now, I fear it will all be so much worse because I haven’t just stolen Kane’s heart—according to his brother, I also stole him from Mia and their child.
God, just the thought of Mia and her baby—Kane’s baby—makes my stomach churn.
Was Kyle right? Kane didn’t deny it, but his actions went a long way in confirming. Can I stay with him knowing that just months ago, he was with Mia? Sure, maybe he was telling the truth when he told me that they didn’t have a relationship, but what if they did at one point?
I had thought, until today, the hardest part of overcoming my old self would have been eradicating the ghosts that had haunted me. Pushing past the fear that ruled me. Letting go of the pain I had felt over losing my mom, accepting that what ‘family’ I had left would never be a true family, forgiving the ones that had played the part in dragging me to rock bottom, and most importantly, learning to love every part of me. That last one being the hardest, but with Kane’s help, not only did I see myself in a new light, but also the constant anxiety I had been carrying around worrying about the judgment of others had disappeared completely.
But now I know that the hardest part of overcoming is going to be in believing in the strength I had just found. Now, forced to test the boundaries of that strength and faith in myself, I’m afraid I’m not going to win this time.
Because, like it or not, the key to unhooking the final chains that held me captive for so long is right in front of my face. I felt that key turn when I was able to leave Kane, recognizing that I deserved better than secrets.
“No time like the present, Willow,” I mumble to myself and grab my phone. I feel those imaginary chains dig in and tighten around my chest, the fear getting thicker as I type Kane’s name into my search browser.
When the screen fills with links, my stomach pitches and almost shoots out my mouth.
“Oh, God.”
Kane leaves Mia alone, pregnant, and scared.
What’s next for Mia and Kane?
Mia in danger of losing Kane’s child.
Who is this mystery woman?
Mystery woman revealed!
The first few headlines don’t cause me nearly as much anxiety as the last. I can confidently move past those because I know there is no way that they will hold anything other than speculation meant to sell papers. Kane wouldn’t have kept the paternity of Mia’s baby a secret from me and just verified them to the media. There’s no way. It gives me a little peace that regardless of what those say, it’s all just lies until I hear it from him.
I feel a little lighter with that realization, but just looking at that last link—the least damning of all of them—makes me feel seconds away from a panic attack.
I’ve been afraid of this. What the public thinks about me. And whether I’m strong enough to handle it.
Because I know that regardless of how big Kane’s secret is and what it means for our relationship, if I’m not able to hack it emotionally when everyone is judging me freely—then there is no point in even continuing.
If I can’t be strong enough to handle their words, then I might as well be the Willow who Kane met two months ago. I have to prove to myself that it isn’t him I’m hiding behind to avoid being strong for myself. In a way, I should be thanking Kyle for slapping me in the face with the truth. It’s forced me to realize I have to be strong alone, with no one holding me up.
Hovering my thumb over the link to the widely popular tabloid blog, I hold my breath as the page loads.
The world was abuzz today when news hit that confirmed bachelor, Kane Masters, 35, was officially off the market. Of course, no one had been able to confirm that rumor until today. It was to everyone’s shock that the award-winning actor is stepping out with someone other than his on-again, off-again love, Mia Post, 34.
Masters has recently been dodging the rumors that he and Post are about to be parents. Neither one of their reps would offer comments on the matter, but the pictures of them both seen leaving the woman’s clinic to the stars, and the fact that Mia herself is very pregnant, I would imagine that official word wouldn’t be far away for the pair.
Good God, the picture that follows shows Mia during a recent talk show appearance. She looked stunning, but it wasn’t her flawlessness that held my attention; it was the very round, pregnant belly that even the baggy dress couldn’t hide. The date under the picture puts it as just two weeks prior.
She looks to be five or six months pregnant, and if that’s the case, then Kane wouldn’t have been lying if he told me that they weren’t together when we met, but that doesn’t mean that they weren’t together months before Kane and I met.
I sigh and continue the article. My anxiety is through the roof, and instead of holding my breath, it comes out in a whoosh when I read the next part.
However, all of those rumors seemed to vanish in one second when a source close to the Masters camp came forward and confirmed that he is most definitely in a relationship, just not with Mia Post.
Masters has been on location in Georgia for his film, Impenetrable. This will be his first time in the director’s seat and already there has been rumors that the film, due out this coming summer, will be the frontrunner for many Oscar noms. It’s said that during his time down South, he met and began a relationship with Willow Tate, 29, of New York City.
It’s unclear what this means for Mia and her baby, but the insider close to the couple said that Masters and Tate couldn’t keep their hands off each other during their recent trip to visit her stepfather, owner of the Logan Agency, one of the top modeling agencies in New York. The couple was pictured leaving New York from a private airstrip close to the city, headed to California to finish filming.