“I got you,” he murmured. “It’s ok.”

It wasn’t ok. Nothing was ok. Andrew was divorced or at least said he was. I didn’t know what know that meant or if it meant anything at all. His dark eyes captured mine. The feeling of being back in his arms again turned my brain off and my hormones on. I knew it wasn’t the correct response, but my body huddled closer into his embrace. The warmth from underneath his shirt burned my skin, sending a trail fire between my legs.

Andrew’s gaze flickered with residual affection. “My sweet Haven,” he murmured. “I have missed you.”

I pushed him off, my head reeling. I’d played and replayed the moment Andrew and I would meet again over and over in my mind until it merged into my dreams. It got to the point where I looked forward to falling asleep. Only then my restless soul was at peace. However, divorce didn’t cure our broken relationship. Andrew had withheld the truth from me when he made me believe he was an open book. I didn’t know whom the real Andrew was and that twisted the knife to the bone.

“Is that another one of your lies?” I sneered. “Because if so, I don’t want to hear it.”

He winced as if my barb literally struck him in the heart. “Fuck, Haven. This is not who you are. You are not this mean, bitter person and the idea that I’m the one who turned you into this shadow of your former self….” He shook his head, unable to complete the sentence.

“Don’t give yourself too much credit.”

The lid flew off Andrew’s anger. I took a step backwards as his face contorted into a mask of anger. “Do you want to know what a lie is? This!” He gestured to me. “This cold, heartless bitch act is a lie, because our love was real as the grass underneath our feet and the clouds floating above.” He smacked my hand against his chest where his heart resided. “It still is,” Andrew whispered. “I love you, Haven, always and forever. I will not give up on us until you are mine again.”

Tears pricked underneath my eyelids. “You already gave up because you never fought for me in the first place. That day I left you kneeling in the snow, you know what you did? You went back to your wife and played house. Those once a week phone calls were a half-baked attempt and we both know that.”

“As soon as you left, I went upstairs and pulled out the divorce papers that had been sitting in my drawer for months. It was a long night. Tears were shed, past regrets were thrown, but in the end, Camilla signed on the dotted line. She realized the man she fell in love with wasn’t the same man standing before her.” Andrew unveiled a thin manila envelope from his jacket pocket and handed it to me. “Open it.”

With shaking hands, I ripped opened the seal. Inside was a two-page document. On the last page scrawled their signatures, stating their marriage was no longer binding, dated three and a half months ago.

My resolve was weakening, however, on the outside I remained strong. “If you guys are divorced, then why did I hear her in the background of one your voice mails?”

Andrew’s eyebrows scrunched together. “When?”

“January fifth, a week ago.”

Awareness dawned in his gaze. “That wasn’t Camilla. That was my sister. She was staying with me during Christmas break. By the way, my family still asks about you. How you’re doing, what you’re up to, and most importantly, what an idiot I am to have lost you. ”

A hint of a smile tugged at my lips at the idea they had my side, not their own flesh and blood. My head and heart at odds, confusion churned in my stomach. “Fine! You are divorced, but that doesn’t change the fact you withheld information from me.”

He held out his hand. I glanced at his calloused fingers, remembering how when interlocked with mine, it felt as if anything was possible. That together we could conquer whatever was chucked into our paths. Reluctantly, my hand grasped his palm. An electric current traveled down my arm to my toes.

Andrew chuckled softy. “It’s good to know our chemistry is still in tact.”

“There has to be more to this relationship than chemistry, like trust for instance.”

“Haven, I fucked up and ruined the best thing that has ever happened to me. What do you want me to do? Fall to my knees and beg?”

About to do exactly that, I quickly grabbed his elbow and hauled him to his feet. “No, I don’t want you to beg.” Scrubbing my hands over my face, frustration trickled into my veins. “You show up here, looking all handsome with divorce papers and lines straight out of a Jane Austin novel. Lines I have heard from you before. Why now?”

“Because it wouldn’t have been fair to you otherwise. For six months, I’d buried myself under my work, trying to escape the pain of losing my wife and unborn child. Then you entered my life like a freight train. Those three weeks I spent with you filled a gap inside my heart and I fell for you—hard.

“However when you left, that hole ripped open again and I returned to the broken man I once was. Haven….” He cupped my cheek in his hand. “I wanted to give my whole self to you like you did with me. Since you left, I’ve spent my time going through the grieving process I’d denied myself. Once the light at the end of the tunnel appeared, the person I wanted to be waiting for me was you.”

“You hurt me Andrew,” I whispered, my eyes flooded with the pain and suffering he caused. “I don’t know if I can give you my trust again. It’s as if the person I thought you were doesn’t exist.”

“You’re right, that person doesn’t exist anymore and neither does the woman I met nearly four months ago at The Roasted Bean. We both changed but I’m hoping you will allow me a do-over because the people we are now have the chance at an everlasting love story.” Andrew wiped away the tears that sprung free from my eyes. “What do you say?”

Throughout life, you are presented with moments that take you down a million different paths, but choosing one over the other will not deny you a rainy day. When it pours though, you want somebody to stand by your side and provide the umbrella. Andrew was that somebody. I loved him and denying our second chance at being together would be one of my biggest regrets.

The broken pieces of my heart were sewn back together as a smile spilt open my cheeks. “I say yes, a million and one times, yes.”

Andrew showered my face with kisses that had me laughing with joy. He swung me off my feet and whooped. “I’ll move to Los Angeles, I’ll move to Timbuktu if that makes you happy!”

“Nah, I think its time I go back home—to Detroit and to you.”

It would take a million years to properly thank everybody who has had made this dream of mine possible but here we go!

To my boyfriend and overall rock star, Matt, my life wouldn’t be the same without you. You have encouraged me to reach heights I didn’t know were possible.

My mom and dad who planted the seed of becoming an author when I was ten years old. Your love of the craft spurred an everlasting love of the written word.

To my editor, Deb, for catching over-used phrases and grammatical errors that most 1st grader’s wouldn’t make.. haha! You are awesome.

And last, but certainly not least, my out of this world fans.

THANK YOU!

You make each stress-inducing deadline, late night coffee fueled writing session and frustrating mid-novel slump worth it. If I didn’t have you, my laptop would be shattered in a million pieces in a dumpster somewhere.

Copyright © 2014 by Nicole Simone

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

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