"No, I didn't talk to her. But I know her, because I know myself."

"Huh?"

"Lauren, I'm a drunk. I've been sober for two years now, but I know what I am and the pain I've caused. I put my parents and bandmates through hell, I drove away Shelby over it, and I earned myself a helluva reputation to boot. But none of that stopped my compulsion to drink. Savory saved my life when he dragged me to a meeting and sponsored me in AA. So yeah, I think I have a pretty fair idea of Grace's struggle."

I'm stunned into silence for a moment as I click through freeze-frames in my memory. I guessed that Savory didn't drink but Drax...

"You're not sober! I saw you drinking at the bar with that sparkly pink nightmare, and that night in Vegas when we...y'know.... We were both trashed!"

His silence is unnerving. I pull back to look at him. "Drax?"

He gives me a wolfish grin and shrugs. "You saw me drinking lemonade at that bar. And sorry to disappoint you, darlin', but I was sober as a judge when I married you."

What is with this day?! First, I discover that my dead mom is alive, and now I find out that my 'drunken groom' doesn't even drink! I've barely processed his words when it dawns on me what his words actually mean.

"So...you married me because you...wanted to?"

He's still got that shit-eating grin on his face and I'm not sure if I'd rather smack it off or kiss it off. Maybe both.

"Don't you remember what I wrote on my headshot the day we met?"

Of course I remembered. Like I would ever forget. Marry me. My heart starts thumping in my chest.

"Did you think I was fucking around? Lola, you stole my heart the minute you chewed me out on the sidewalk in front of your dads' store. I knew you were the one and I thought it was only fair to let you know."

He laughs but I can barely breathe. I'm glad he continues because I couldn't speak if my life depended on it.

"I spent enough of my life screwing it up, I sure as hell wasn't gonna let you get away from me without a fight. So when you suggested we get married in Vegas, you didn't have to ask twice. Lauren, haven't you figured it out by now? I love you."

"I...I love you, too, Drax." I can barely squeak it out, mostly because I never truly thought I'd get to say the words. Even after we patched things up, I never imagined he felt the same way.

Drax whoops and gathers me into his arms. Our lips search each other out, seeking confirmation of our love. But we're both so elated we can barely focus. He grabs my face and rains down kisses over every inch, making me giggle. Finally, he pulls me into him and we just hold each other for a few minutes, rocking gently with the motion of the boat.

"Now I'm a little bummed about the annulment," I mumble into his neck. He smells so good I could just eat him with a spoon -- or without -- but I try to control myself, at least for the moment. A pang of absence shoots through me when he pulls away. Grinning, naturally.

"Good news on that front, too, darlin'! I never filed the papers."

I blink in absolute confusion. "What?"

"Yep. Never even called the lawyer. Figured I'd wait so see if we could make this thing work, and look. We did! So...here."

He tugs something from a tiny pocket in his jeans and holds it out. It's the ring. My ring. My wedding ring. I watch as he slips it back on my finger, numb and speechless.

"Been carrying it around every day since Vegas."

The giant rock sparkles and glints like crazy because of the tremors. My hand is shaking so badly I can barely focus on the ring. What I can focus on is the anger boiling inside me and how truly screwed up this day has been.

"You lied to me?"

His grin falters. "Uh, well, not exactly. I was just holding off till you made your decision about us. But it's all okay now."

"You're kidding, right? You can't possibly be that stupid, can you?"

He bristles at the name-calling, and normally I wouldn't be so mean, but I'm flabbergasted at what he's done.

"Hey, now--"

"No! Don't you dare try to pretend this isn't a big deal just because we figured things out. You promised you'd take care of the annulment. What else are you lying to me about?"

"Nothing, I swear!"

"Just what a liar would say." I jump up to leave. I can't stay here one more minute. How can I trust him now?

"Lauren, don't leave. Agreed, it wasn't my finest moment, but I only did it because I'm so fucking in love with you. I couldn't let you go, not without trying first. Don't you see?"

"Is that supposed to be an apology?!" I balk.

A cold, hard glint sparkles in his eyes. "No, it's not. Because I'm not sorry. I want to be married to you. You want it, too. You just said so."

He's got me there. I did just say something to that effect, but still...

"I don't know what I want now. You lied to me, Drax. I need to think."

Before he can speak, I scrabble up the steps, jump to the dock and flee.

I have no idea where I'm going, I just know I need to walk. Maybe I'll go see Pepper. Then again, maybe not. Everyone else in my life has shocked or disappointed me today; I couldn't bear it if she had some big secret, too.

No, better to just walk and think. The waterfront is the perfect place for that. Seagulls swoop and tumble on the brisk wind that sweeps through the Golden Gate. White caps tumble on the bay, giving a group of small sailboats a bouncy ride toward Alcatraz. I'd sit and watch but I have too much nervous energy built up inside.

The breeze helps to cool me off, whisking away some of my anxiety, but not even close to all of it. My emotions feel like a piece of flotsam being tossed around in the bay's choppy waters. I barely crest one wave of emotion before another crashes down on top of me.

First things first, I think. My dads have been there for me all my life so I'll start with them. It's also the easiest to deal with because I know in my heart I'll forgive them. Drax was right that I hadn't left them much choice because anytime Grace was brought up, I shot them down. How can I say they're wrong when they only did as I asked?

Grace, on the other hand, was never there for me. She made her choice when I was born that she loved the booze and pills more than me. The old bitterness wells up but I let it roll over me and then it's gone.

Once again, I think back to Drax's words. As much as I'd like to cling to my childish anger, I can't deny that what he said rings true. Dad dragged me to enough support groups for the loved ones of alcoholics as a kid to know that addicts' brains seem to work differently.

As I stroll through a lovely, hilly park, gratitude washes over me. Grace had a lot of options when she found out she was pregnant after a one-night stand. She could have ended the pregnancy, but she chose not to. She could have never bothered to track down Dad. She could have insisted on full custody, or even partial custody, but instead she signed away all her parental rights immediately so Dad would know he'd never lose me. And maybe to take away any temptation she might have later.

Grace didn't give me up because she didn't love me. Just the opposite. She gave me up because she loved me more than anything and wanted only the best for me.

I smile through my tears. Not gonna lie, there's still a lot of pain, but for the first time ever, I see a real glimmer of hope. It's going to be a slow process, but I know she'll be patient. She's waited this long, after all.

The hill heading down toward Fisherman's Wharf is steep, and I can barely keep up with my own feet as I trot down. It's sort of how I've felt during my whirlwind 'whatever' with Drax.