“This is exactly what I want. You’re what I want. Anna, what is it that you want?” James asked nervously, standing up and stalking towards Anna.

“Well…” Anna shrugged. She grabbed his collar and pulled him towards her. She stopped just centimetres away from his mouth. “You.” She smiled, then kissed him deeply. As their tongues danced, Anna felt completely at peace. Nothing could ever ruin this moment for her. Pulling back, Anna sucked in several deep breaths before planting a lingering kiss on his lips as she pushed him out the door.

On the floor he had left a pair of his tracksuit pants and a matching jumper. As Anna searched for her wet underwear that she wasn’t looking forward to putting back on, she realised they were missing. James, you sly little bugger, Anna thought. Then she lifted up the clothes he had left for her. Underneath was a gift bag. All that was written on the tag was:

To the love of my life,

James.

As she read it not only did it make her giggle but it also made her heart lurch. Anna had never imagined that she would be a fiancée, let alone James Thompson’s fiancée. She opened up the bag curiously. In the bottom was some brand new, very sexy, and very expensive lingerie: a black bra made from the most delicate lace she had ever seen and matching panties.

When she emerged from the bathroom, she found James lying on his bed playing PlayStation games as usual. If he isn’t in the pool then he’s perched on the lounge playing those damn games, Anna thought.

She walked in and flopped down beside him on the bed. “Hey gorgeous.” He smiled, kissing her lightly on the back of her hand. Whenever she and James were totally alone he remained the same perfect gentleman that he appeared to be in public. It really wasn’t an act. That was just who he was.

“Don’t ‘hey gorgeous’ me. Nice choice with the lingerie.” Anna giggled, slightly embarrassed.

“Well, surely I get a sneak peek! Don’t I?” James chuckled with a wicked twinkle in his eye.

Anna was reluctant to show him—was it too much? Was it tempting fate? But after only a second’s hesitation she agreed nervously. James knew and respected Anna’s ‘no sex before marriage’ policy. They often slept together, but that was all that ever happened. They slept. They had seen each other naked and had no issues. They were both waiting patiently until that magical night, the night of their wedding. Although James had to admit the waiting was definitely getting harder.

Those days seemed to be a lifetime ago now, Anna told herself. Now she was sitting in a wheelchair, and starting to drift asleep at the table.

“You tired, Princess?” James asked her. She had used up all of her energy and now could barely summon the strength to nod. He excused himself as he lifted her weak and weary body from her wheelchair and carried her into the bedroom. Within moments of her head touching the pillow, Anna was sleeping soundly.

***

James

James wandered back into the dining room, where his parents and Anna’s parents had gathered. They were getting along like they had always known each other. The thought it’s scary crossed James’s mind. He had always assumed that mothers and fathers were not supposed to get along with the in-laws, but there they were, chatting away easily.

“How’s our girl doing?” Michael asked, as James pulled out a seat.

“She’s tired. As soon as I put her into bed, she was asleep.” James looked worried, but tried to sound optimistic.

“Well, she has had a big couple of days. She’ll be better tomorrow,” Brandon said. “I don’t mean to be rude, James, but what actually happened? How did she crash?”

Gulping down the lump that had mysteriously formed in his throat, James attempted to fill in the blanks. “Nobody knows for sure, that’s the thing. We were at Justin’s having dinner and then Anna just up and left. When I got back to the hotel, she had already packed all of her things and vanished. Her nurse rang me, and I went straight to the hospital. She hasn’t told me what made her leave or what happened yet. And I didn’t want to push her until she was strong enough.” James’s face was straight and expressionless. Renee could see the distress in her brother’s eyes and reached out and took his hand.

“It will all work out. For what it’s worth I think you did the right thing, not trying to rush her. She loves you and I know she’ll tell you when she’s ready. Just give her time. I just know she will.” Renee smiled. James kept telling himself Renee was right. After all, she had known Anna longer than he had.

“I hope so,” he said, deflated.

Not long after Anna had gone to bed, her family headed back to her apartment. They would stay there tonight, visit Anna tomorrow, and if she didn’t need them they would head back home. Once they left, James slipped into the spare room to check that Anna didn’t need anything. She hadn’t moved since he had helped her into bed a few hours earlier. He had already planned his day tomorrow. He would go to training early and with any luck he would be home before Anna woke up or needed him. He would spend the day with her before heading back to training late in the afternoon. By then Michael would be home to look out for her if she needed him. As he was staring down at the bed he noticed how peaceful she looked. It was almost as though nothing was bothering her. She had no fears, no doubt, and no troubles…which James knew was not exactly the case. Reluctant to leave, he bent down, kissed her gently, and then disappeared upstairs and crawled into his own bed.

The next morning James arrived home from training and just tossed his bag on the floor as he raced through the living room. His hair was still dripping wet and the chlorine clung to his skin. He hadn’t even bothered to shower or change. Every thought led him home to Anna. He raced through the house, desperate to see her. When he opened the bedroom door he was startled to see the bed was empty. Anna wasn’t there. He ran through to the kitchen but still there was no sign of her. James ran through the house calling out for her to no avail. James ran back to the spare bedroom. Then he spotted a small hand sticking out the side of the bed. Anna was lying on the floor next to the bed. James wanted to kick himself for not seeing her the instant he got home but now was not the time. He bent down and scooped her up. She had done more damage to her already battered body.

Chapter 5

Anna

Once he’d settled Anna back in her bed on a nest of pillows, James went and made them some coffee. He returned moments later carrying a tray with her breakfast. Anna sat up and began to eat. “You have to be careful, a girl could get used to this.” Anna smirked, trying to lighten the mood.

“Well, that’s the plan. I think it comes with the whole marriage arrangement. I get to take care of you and you don’t get to complain about it.” James laughed. Then, almost as if his body could no longer contain the words, James’s serious side emerged. He was now lying across the end of her bed, and all signs of light and laughter had vanished. “Princess, I know you probably don’t want to talk about it and I don’t want to push you, but I need to know, what happened in Canberra? Why did you want to leave? Please, Anna. Talk to me ’cause my imagination is running away from me,” he begged her.

Taking a deep breath, Anna attempted to explain the best she could. “I don’t know. I don’t know how to explain it.”

“Just try,” James encouraged.

“I guess the truth is the more I thought about it, the more I realised that you deserved better. Better than all this. I have absolutely nothing to offer you. And I know that. I guess I always knew it but while we were in Canberra it was like the blinders came off and I saw just how big that gap was and how much I’m holding you back. And I was forced to accept that. I didn’t want to but it was hard not to. It was so obvious. Not just to me, but to everyone. I love you so much but you deserve to be happy. And you should have the best of everything. And that’s not me.” Anna didn’t cry. She didn’t smile. She just sat there straight-faced, staring blankly into the bottom of her coffee cup.