They drifted to the nearby magazine section. Shad finished getting the RAT kicked off and made a quick job of looking over lodging options in St. Louis before he closed down the computer. Shad strode over to his parents and shrugged before opening his arms.
“Sorry about that. I do usually try not to be such a knot head.”
Mam took that opportunity to finally hug him. Shad wrapped his own arms tightly around her. It had been a long time since he’d hugged her like this – probably not since his wedding day. Then Mam shared news about Dulsie as they headed back out to the car to return home.
Dulsie was determined to dodge the pain medication. Any time the staff showed up in her room, Dulsie would put on a cheerful face and persuade them she really wasn’t in that bad a shape, acetaminophen would be fine, thank you. Whenever Dulsie thought no one was looking, though, Mam could tell that her daughter-in-law was becoming more aware of the pain. Both she and Jill tried to tell Dulsie there were stronger medications available that would still be safe for the baby, but Dulsie was determined to not take any chances.
That was Dulsie: brave, selfless, bull-headed. Shad found himself contemplating that if he could only give Dulsie back peace in her life, he’d take on even more agony to give that to her. Let God do with him what He willed, just spare Dulsie.
After supper, Shad went to his room and finished packing the clothes he’d washed earlier that day plus a couple more outfits from Pap. He had formulated a plan, and he had to be packed. Now he also had to share just a little more information with his parents.
When Shad went back downstairs, he found Mam and Pap exactly where he expected to. They were out on the front porch, sitting in the wooden lounge chairs Karl had built several years ago. Both were in a semi-reclined position, and Pap was just starting to light his pipe. Pap smoked an average of only two or three times a week because there were plenty of evenings he didn’t have time to indulge in that notoriety. Mam was reading a book, the pages of which were pinned down with her thumbs to keep the breeze that was blowing across the porch from flipping them untimely.
Shad half sat, half leaned on the railing, just to one side of them. He took a moment to appreciate the spicy, fruity aroma from the smoke before speaking.
“I’m leaving tomorrow morning.”
Pap looked up from his pipe in surprise and Mam closed her book.
“Now what are you up to?” Pap frowned.
“I have some unfinished business to attend to.”
“As in continuing what you started at the bookstore?”
Shad leveled his gaze at Pap and met his eyes for a few seconds. “There’s little else I can tell you.”
Pap and Mam looked at each other, and then returned their attentions to Shad.
“Why are you so secretive?” Mam asked.
“Complicity.”
“More hacking?” Pap narrowed his eyes. “When are you finally going to turn this over to the authorities?”
Shad took a deep breath. He’d rehearsed many times in his head what he had to say, so now seemed the time to say it.
“You two have done more for me than you’ll ever really know. Thank you. Now I get to return some of that favor.” He glanced toward Pap. “Most likely the sheriff will show up tomorrow with a warrant to seize my computer and give it a high tech combing through. You’ll be able to honestly tell them you don’t know where I went, and they’ll have to take time to look for me.”
Mam frowned. “Shad?”
“Don’t worry, I do want to talk to them as soon as I finish this business. I’ve got this planned out. I’ve got a backup plan. I’ll be back within a couple of days.”
“What about your excursion to the book store?” Pap’s eyes were narrowed.
“You can tell them about that. Believe me, the more they want my computer, the better for Dulsie.” Shad smiled gently. “I just wanted to give you the benefit of knowing I’m gonna leave before dawn. Don’t worry about me.”
“Oh sure.” Pap threw his hands into the air. “We won’t worry about you one bit.”
“Are you absolutely sure this is what you have to do?” Mam asked.
“I’m gonna use the law against itself. Hey, I gotta do something to keep up the Delaney notoriety.”
“Oh great,” Mam muttered to Pap. “Now he’s starting to sound like you.”
Chapter Twenty
There is always a right and a wrong way, and the wrong way always seems the more reasonable.
--George Edward Moore
Shad had to kill a little time around Jefferson City before he boarded the train, which included withdrawing a few hundred dollars at an ATM. If he was going to leave a trail for law enforcement to follow, it would be both convincing and convenient to pique their interest and make it a challenge. They would figure out that he went to St. Louis, but St. Louis was a mighty big place.
After he arrived at that destination, Shad had plenty of time to walk with his overnight satchel and laptop over twenty blocks to the hotel. During his online time at the bookstore Shad selected this establishment as his base of operation.
Since this was Thursday afternoon he had no trouble acquiring a room and paid for it with some of the cash. Despite his leisurely walk, July’s heat and the concrete conspired to make him sweat through the tan shorts and olive button-down shirt Shad wore, so he took a shower. After pulling on denim shorts and a teal tee shirt, he figured it was time to carry out the next part of his plan.
Shad took a nap.
Luckily his early morning and the afternoon heat combined into enough of a force to overcome Shad’s anxiety if the RAT had been activated, allowing him to fall asleep. When he awoke early in the evening, Shad took a stroll to a nearby burger joint to get a meal to take back to his room and eat. One of the reasons he didn’t dine at the restaurant was the storm blowing in. Large drops of rain began pelting the window in his room soon after Shad started eating, and he spent a while after his meal standing at that window and watching the wind create undulating curtains of water while lightning intermittently brightened the sky with outstretched bony fingers.
It seemed a bit odd that things like crowds caused him emotional discomfort, but Shad was actually fascinated by storms. Loud noises always gave him an adrenaline jolt, but Shad learned long ago to suppress any reaction more active than a slight wince. He had made use of an unseasonable storm that wasn’t predicted to propose to Dulsie.
Early in November, on a beautiful, bright day, they went hiking at a state park. They saw the storm blowing in and tried to retreat to the trailhead, but it was fast and overtook them just as they reached a small pavilion that was still a few hundred yards from the parking lot. The wind blasted rain and twigs into the shelter that provided little more than a roof, so Shad immediately turned his back to the gale and clasped Dulsie to his torso. It lasted only a few minutes, and Dulsie got wet, but he got drenched. After the isolated thunderstorm blew over, Dulsie laughed while she plucked off leaves and sticks that were plastered to his shirt. Shad told her that he wanted to always be there for Dulsie and share the rest of his life with her. Dulsie’s laughter faded into one of the sweetest smiles he’d ever seen.
It was the same smile she beamed at him on their wedding day as they stood at the front of the worship house, and before a room full of witnesses solemnized their commitment to each other. Shad unequivocally rated it as the best day of his life, but he knew it should lead to other “best days,” such as when they had children.
Shad stared into the storm and contemplated how much he had been ignoring the fact he and Dulsie really did have a child on the way. It was a reality almost difficult to wrap his mind around, yet in another sense it was a reality so stark he knew his life was forever changed. With an all too familiar twinge of guilt Shad remembered that for a split second, after he learned Dulsie had been shot, the thought surfaced in his mind things would be better for them if Dulsie lost the baby. Some father he was turning out to be.