My hands wrap around his neck, my fingers play with the hair at the nape. I know how hard it will be for me to leave him tomorrow. My parents gave me a trip to Europe as a graduation present. They have never been the type to do something out of the kindness of their heart and I expect they gave me this trip to try to put a wedge between Brian and me. They have never liked me dating someone below my “class,” however I don’t care about any of that. I never have. I’m not like them.

My best friend, Lacey, is coming with me and I really am excited to travel. The only cloud hanging over me is leaving Brian. I guess that this will be the true test of our relationship. We have been together for four years now. I met him when I was a freshman and he was a senior on my first day of school. The connection between us was so strong that we have been almost inseparable ever since.

Our relationship has been anything but easy. We are so different and get into a ton of fights, but as much as we fight it doesn’t last for long. Most of the arguments stem from the fact that he is a crazed alpha idiot and I refuse to fall in line. I like our dynamic though, it’s exciting and passionate.

“Let’s go to bed, take a nap, and I’ll give you an encore.” His mouth kisses my neck and I am so tempted to give into his offer. I can’t blow Dan off though. We’ve been friends and neighbors since grade school and it wouldn’t be right for me to just leave without saying goodbye. I take a deep breath knowing that even after what just happened we will end up arguing when I tell Brian I’m leaving. He hates Dan, for what I’m not really too sure. They have been at each other’s throats for as long as Brian and I have been together. He is convinced that Dan is into me no matter how many times I tell him that’s not the case. We are just friends and have been for half of my life.

“You know I can’t go to bed right now. Even that amazing distraction isn’t going to accomplish your goal.” I wrap my arms around him trying to calm his emotions and just get him to see it’s not a big deal. “Come with me.”

Brian uses the table to push himself up off of me. He walks back toward the living room and when I follow him I see that he is getting dressed. I start to pick up my clothes and put them on.

“Why do you have to be so damn stubborn and pig headed? Nothing is going on between me and Dan, I just want to go say goodbye.” I‘m pleading with him to stop his craziness.

“Then go.” That’s all he says to me before making his way upstairs.

I let out a loud screech before calling after him. “You are such a damn child!” I open the door and slam it as I exit. I swear to God that man will be the damn death of me.

***

I pull up to Dan’s house still pissed off from the fight with Brian. I just don’t get why he acts like that. I have never given him any reason to doubt me. I know he has been through a lot but I just don’t understand why he can’t see that he can trust me. Dan opens the door as I’m walking up.

“Hey, Julia! You excited for tomorrow?”

I put on the same face I use with my parents when I don’t want them to see what’s really going on and reply, “Yea, just super tired already I have no idea how I’m going to do that flight.” I walk into the house and head into the living room plopping down onto the couch.

“I figured we would just watch a movie and hang out if that’s good with you.” I nod and he heads off into the kitchen. After a few minutes, I hear popping coming from what I’m assuming is the microwave. I stare at my phone wanting to text Brian. I hate when things are like this with us.

Dan comes walking back in and turns on some comedy that I can barely pay attention to. He can probably tell something is off but thankfully he doesn’t ask. I’m so tired and emotionally exhausted from Brian’s roller coaster that if I could I’d go home right now.

***

My alarm is going off and all I want to do is hit snooze and go back to bed. I open my eyes, sitting up in shock when I realize I am still on Dan’s couch. I must have fallen asleep during the movie last night.

“Hey, sleepy.” I turn around to see him walking into the living room drinking a cup of coffee. “You fell asleep about fifteen minutes into the movie last night and I figured I would just let you crash.”

“Thanks.” I reach for my phone, disappointment washing over me when I see that I don’t have any missed calls or texts. Brian is supposed to take me to the airport in about a half an hour so I text him.

I’ll be ready soon. <3

I stand up and walk over to Dan. “Sorry I was a bum and fell asleep. I have to run home to get ready to go.” I give him a hug and turn to leave.”

“Do you need a ride?”

I smile at him. “No, Brian is taking me. Thanks though, I’ll see you at the end of the summer.” I run out the door trying not to freak out about what little time I have to get ready. Thankfully, Dan just lives next door. I head into my house and jump right in the shower. When I get out I check my phone and there is no answer from Brian.

Hey, I know we fought, but you’re still coming right?

He probably just overslept, I think. I get dressed in yoga pants and a comfy t-shirt. The flight is long and I’m not trying to impress anyone on it. When I still don’t have a response from Brian, I call him—once, twice, three times. Each call goes straight to voicemail. Is he really that mad? Is he really going to stand me up? I only have about five minutes before I need to leave so I text Dan that I will take him up on that ride. I send Brian one more text, not understanding what is going on.

I can’t believe you’re not even going to say goodbye to me. I know we fought but it was over something so stupid. If you want to let that ruin us that’s your choice. I guess I’ll see you in a couple months.

A tear falls from my eye as the fact that he isn’t coming sets in. When the doorbell rings, I jump up and put on some sunglasses to hide my bloodshot eyes. I make my way down the steps with my bags to see my mom and dad waiting at the bottom. “Julia,” my mom says, her voice as perfect as her outfit, “have fun dear. We will see you at the end of the summer.” She gives me a careful hug so she doesn’t mess up her head to toe perfection.

“Call us when you land,” my father says, his emotionless voice business as usual.

“Okay Dad.” We exchange a rare hug, which feels so awkward.

I open the door to see Dan. He greets my parents before carrying my bags to the car. Once we are on our way he turns to me and asks, “What happened to Brian?”

I shake my head. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

Dan nods but doesn’t say anything more. When we get to the airport I see Lacey waiting for us, but my eyes are scanning the crowd for someone else. A part of me was hoping that maybe Brian would meet me here, tell me how sorry he is, how much he loves me. No such luck.

Dan unloads my bags before giving me a hug that lasts a little too long. “Be safe, Julia.” He gives me a kiss on the forehead.

“Bye, Dan, I’ll see you in a couple of months.”

I turn and walk toward Lacey trying to hold in my emotions until we are alone.

As I walk through the doors of the airport not only am I leaving the country for the summer.

I am leaving the man I love.

Chapter One

Brian

As I drive into town my body tenses. I know where she is and what she has been doing with her life and to say it doesn’t piss me the fuck off is an understatement. Jules was my girl, until she decided I wasn’t good enough for her and her high class life. I thought I knew her. I thought she was better than that, that she was the type of person who looked beyond the material shit. Basically, I thought she was nothing like her parents.

Jules was the love of my life. The one that got away, or should I say flew away. She screwed me over for some damn clown, left for the summer, and then I hear she ended up with him. Eight years of my life have passed since the day I lost her and the emotions are still as fresh as they were that night. The feeling of knowing that I wasn’t good enough for yet another person in my life, especially someone I loved as much as her, cut me to the core.