“It belongs to an acquaintance of my brother.”
Huh. I reached for my seatbelt as Mace’s hand closed over mine. I glanced up at him in surprise.
“Thanks. For this. For not going straight to the cops.”
I nodded. Why did my heart race every time he touched me? Why did I feel like I’d done something wrong by him every time he looked at me with those sad eyes? Why was I the one feeling bad?
The fact that I couldn’t hate him made me want to hate him even more.
I got out of the car, my heart pounding. Mace slipped his hand into mine and squeezed it. I smiled up at him, confused by what I was feeling. Apart from feeling like I was about to vomit, I felt dizzy and more scared than I’d ever felt in my life. I kept thinking about Anna—how scared she must have been.
Taking a deep breath, I took a step toward the house. Mace fell in line beside me.
“I’m right here with you, Leet. As scary as this gets, don’t ever forget that, okay?”
I nodded, swallowing hard.
I followed him inside. The smell of rotting wood hit my senses. I looked up. The roof was caving in in places, and the remnants of last night's rain lay in puddles on the scuffed vinyl floor.
We walked down the hallway in complete silence, only the creaking of the floorboards below us making a sound.
“In here,” Mace said.
I stepped into the room, my breath catching in my throat. I’d watched those videos so many times, it felt like I'd been there before. I suppose in a sense I had.
The room was so sterile, so cold. Shivering, I rubbed my arms as I stared at the table in front of me, feeling sick. That was where it had happened. Right there was where Mace had betrayed me.
I swallowed a laugh. What kind of person was I that the first thing that had entered my mind was myself? Forget about all the pain and terror his sister, and probably countless other women had gone through; this whole thing was all about me, and my stupid little problems.
“Are you okay?”
I glanced up at him as he squeezed my hand. No, I’m far from okay. But I had to push that aside. I had to work through it.
“I'm fine. I’m just a little . . .” My voice trailed off. I didn't even know how to finish that sentence.
“I'm right here. I promise I won't hurt you, Leet.” His voice broke as he leaned forward and kissed my forehead.
But you already have hurt me.
I slowly undressed while Mace was on the phone, giving last-minute instructions to Tim. I undid my shirt, one button at a time, as if my mind was trying to drag out the inevitable. I slipped the shirt over my shoulders and down my arms, letting it fall into a heap on the floor. I left my bra on. I didn't know how this worked, but judging by the videos there was some joy received from watching some clothing being removed.
Dipping my fingers into the waistband of my cargoes, I slipped them down over my hips, aware that Mace was now staring at me. I heard him breathe in sharply.
A flutter filled my stomach. I couldn't deny that I liked that he still found me attractive. I dropped the cargoes on the floor with my shirt, and stood there facing Mace, waiting for him to tell me what to do next.
“You’ve got goosebumps,” he whispered, walking over to me. He ran his hand down my arm, sending shivers racing down my spine.
“Yes, well, it is kind of cold in here,” I muttered, covering my chest with my arms.
“God, you're so beautiful,” he said, cupping my face with his hand.
I closed my eyes, my body weakening it at his touch. He swept a strand of hair away from my face as his eyes gazed deeply into my mine.
What was he thinking?
I couldn't tell. All I knew was no matter how much I wanted to push him away, my heart refused to. In spite of everything, I still loved him. I may not have forgiven him yet, but in that moment I knew I would.
I sat down on the chair as Mace fastened the ropes to my wrists.
“Let me know if it's too tight,” he said.
“Why so concerned?” I asked dryly. “It's not like you haven't tied me up before.”
He narrowed his eyes at me, shaking his head, the edges of his mouth twitching up.
Hey, look at that. I've managed a joke.
He stepped back and surveyed his work.
“Okay, I think we're ready. How you feeling?”
“How do you think I'm feeling?” Right away, I felt bad for snapping. I knew this was hard for him too. “I’ll be better once this is over with,” I said, my voice softer.
“I have to do this now,” he said apologetically.
I nodded, swallowing hard. Well, it wouldn't be a party without a blindfolded and a gag.
I opened my mouth, letting him slip the ball of the gag inside. I bit down gently as he fastened it behind my head. Blindfold in hand, he leaned over and kissed my forehead.
“I love you, Leet.”
Hearing those words made my heart swell. I was thankful for the gag, so I didn't have to respond. I wasn't ready for that.
Darkness surrounded me as he lowered the blindfold over my eyes.
This is terrifying.
With my sight compromised, my other senses kicked in. The feel of the fan blowing against my skin, the sound of my beating heart in my chest . . . the metallic taste in my mouth as I bit down on my lip.
I listened, trying to place Mace's movements around the room.
Click, click, click. Then nothing. Just me locked in my own silence.
My breathing shallowed as I waited for what felt like forever for something to happen. Anything.
“Mm, oh yes. Would you look at that body?”
I stiffened: a voice. Was it the same as the videos? I couldn't be sure. I didn't trust anything that I was thinking. My head was a freaking mess.
“Can you stand her up so I can get a better look at her?”
I could feel Mace behind me, untying the ropes. I swallowed, my throat so dry. He yanked me to my feet. His aggression surprised me. Scared me, even.
This isn’t Mace, and you are not Leeta.
“Yeah, I like that a lot. Get her up on the table so I can see her better.”
All of a sudden the floor gave way below me. My heart pounded as I realized I was in his arms.
He's got you. He won't hurt you.
I gasped as the freezing surface of the metal table hit my back. Holy shit, it was cold. I blinked rapidly, as my muscles clenched.
I could hear him chuckle. I felt sick. I felt dirty.
“Is that a scalpel I see there?” A scalpel?
“Yes. Shall I get it?”
Mace. I sighed. It was such a relief to hear his voice. I'd been afraid this guy would see through my act. But this was no act. This fear—the absolute terror that I felt right through to my core—was real.
“Yes. Cut her bra, in the centre.”
A single slice through the delicate lace material of my purple bra, and my breasts were exposed. I could feel my nipples harden.
“God, she's beautiful. Perfect. Leave the blindfold on.”
God no, please.
Not being able to see Mace . . . I couldn't do this. But I had no choice. I had to do this. And even if I wanted to, I couldn't stop. I was blindfolded and gagged, for fuck’s sake.
“Run the scalpel over her skin. I want to see it trail down to her panties.”
I swallowed as the blade touched the skin between my breasts. He slowly moved it downward. It was sharp, stinging as it broke through the top layer of my skin. My breath caught in my throat as he reached the lace edge, trailing the blade over the soft fabric of my panties. I breathed in sharply, not expecting the arousal that shot through me. It scared me. I shouldn’t be enjoying this. I wasn’t enjoying it. My body was betraying me with its natural response to being sexually stimulated.
Had Mace felt like this? With those other women, had he enjoyed it? He’d obviously gotten himself hard enough to penetrate them…that had to mean something, right?