How he kept trying to say he wouldn’t have done it. Then, how he told me he loved me and would always love me.

“Holy hell, Heather. Josh told you he loved you?”

I nodded my head as I felt another tear roll down my face.

“Heather, did you ever think that maybe Josh is telling you the truth? I mean, I’ve heard Jeff and Gunner talk about how they’ve never seen Josh go this long without hooking up with a girl. I’m not trying to say he was right, thinking about sleeping with Lynda to forget about you, but…he is a man. Their thinking is pretty fucked-up to say the least.”

I let out a small laugh. My heart was screaming for me to go to Josh and beg him to be with me, but my head was telling me something all together different.

“Ells, do you honestly believe that a guy like Josh is really interested in a girl like me?”

“What the hell does that mean, Heather? A girl like you? You’re beautiful, funny, and smart as hell. Yes! I do believe a guy like Josh would be lucky as hell to have a girl like you.”

“My heart wants him so badly, but my head tells me that he’ll never be true to me. He’ll never be happy with just me.”

“I don’t believe that for one minute. Just because he was a player in college doesn’t mean that he can’t find a girl to love and be with just her. Deep down inside, Josh is a sweetheart. Did you know that he’s a Big Brother? He meets with his little brother at least once a week and pays for all of his sports at school because his single mom can’t afford it. He’s also helped build three Habitat for Humanity houses, and he’s helped his dad make all the pews for their church. He told Gunner and me that his dream is to make custom furniture and take over his dad’s business someday. He has as straight head on his shoulders, Heather. He just needs to find that right girl to round it all out.”

I sat there in a state of shock. I didn’t know any of that. Josh had never once mentioned any of those things. My heart was hurting even more.

“I just wish my mother and father were here. They would tell me what to do.”

Ellie looked at me, and then stood up and grabbed my hand pulling me into a hug.

“Oh god, Heather. I know how much you miss your parents, baby, but I promise you that they would’ve told you this has to be your decision. Only you know your heart, Heather. I know how much you depended on your dad and how much of a rock he was for you. But, baby, you need to know that you can do this on your own. You can’t be afraid to let someone else into your heart because you’re afraid of losing them.”

I pulled back and smiled at my best friend. Then, I thought about Ari.

“How’s Ari?”

“Come on, we’ll talk on the way to the bar…or as Gunner keeps calling it, the honky-tonk.”

Hooking our arms together, we started back toward the house.

Gunner was leaning up against his truck, talking on his cell phone. He didn’t look very happy.

This whole damn day just sucked.

As we got closer, Gunner hung up and looked at Ellie.

“What’s wrong?” Ellie asked Gunner.

He pushed his hands through his hair.

“That was Jeff. He just needed to talk to someone. I guess Ari’s been crying nonstop, and Jeff is doing nothing but blaming himself. I’d really like to go into Austin and give Rebecca a goddamn kick in the ass.”

“Maybe we shouldn’t go out. I mean, with Ari in the hospital and Jeff so upset…Gunner, maybe we should go back to the hospital.”

“I asked him if he wanted us to and he said no. He and Ari really need to be alone. Come on, let’s get going. I’ve got two beautiful women I need to take dancing tonight.”

Gunner held open the doors for Ellie and me to get into his truck. Leaning in, and helped Ellie buckle her seat belt, and then kissed her and told her he loved her.

My heart swelled at the love these two had for each other.

Will I ever find that kind of love?

A part of me knew I already found it…

And then let it go.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

GUNNER

On the way into town, Ellie filled Heather in on everything that had happened with Ari and Jeff. I still couldn’t believe how crazy Rebecca was. Thank God Jeff found out now before he got attached to the baby.

“I knew she was lying. I knew it! What the hell? Did she really think that Jeff wouldn’t ask for a paternity test?” Heather asked.

“I know, Heather. Believe me, I’ve been thinking about it ever since Jeff told me. A part of me wants to just drive to Austin and beat the shit out of her.”

I had to let out a laugh. I could picture Ellie walking right into the hospital room and knocking the shit out of Rebecca.

“So, let me see if I got this straight. Rebecca slept with Jason, while he was still dating Ari. Rebecca got pregnant, but she slept with Jeff one night when they ran into each other at Rebels. Then, Crysti overheard someone talking about the wedding, but she thought Jeff and Ari getting married.”

“Yep, she called Rebecca, and Rebecca panicked. Her last-ditch attempt to get Jeff back was to tell him the baby was his. I guess she told Jeff that she had thought she would just be able to have the baby and then call him afterward. Her little act of fake contractions today though did her in. She practically tried to have him removed from the hospital.”

“Wow…what a nutcase. I feel so sorry for that baby.”

By the time we got into town, heading into the bar, Heather had filled Ellie in on what happened with Josh. My head was spinning from how fast the two of them had talked. Snippets of what they had talked about were replaying in my head.

“Oh no, he didn’t text her that!”

“Oh my god! He told you that?”

I need a fucking beer. I just wanted to forget this day ever happened. My heart was aching for Jeff and Ari. I wanted to kick Josh’s ass for what he did to Heather. I was worried about my father. Shit.

I walked up to the bar and ordered three beers. By the time I walked back to the table and set them down, I knew something was very wrong. I looked at Ellie and Heather. They were both just staring out at the dance floor. Heather looked like she was about to start crying.

“Cookie Jar” by Gym Class Heroes was playing, and I was having a déjà vu moment. Do I want to turn around and look?

No…but I did. I immediately saw Josh and Lynda dancing. Oh fuck. They were all over each other while Josh was kissing her. I’m going to fucking kill him. He already had a beer in one hand, on his way to getting drunk. The way he was grinding into Lynda was enough to piss me off.

I turned back around and saw Ellie looking at me. She mouthed do something to me. What the hell am I supposed to do? Lynda was an adult, and Josh and Heather weren’t together. So, what does Ellie want me to do?

Heather was still staring at Josh and Lynda. Then, she looked over at Ellie and started laughing.

“What in the world could you possibly find funny about this, Heather?” Ellie asked.

Heather shook her head and shrugged her shoulders. “I was just thinking that this is the perfect song for that asshole. It’s pretty clear to me that he has moved on, so maybe I need to do the same thing.” Then, she picked up her beer and started to down it.

I looked at Ellie as I sat down.

“Aren’t they going to want to card Heather and me when they see us drinking these beers?”

“I’ve been coming here for years. They don’t even as for my ID anymore. Country-living, Ellie.”

“Huh, I’m gonna have to remember that when we have kids,” Ellie said as she took a sip of her beer.

I threw my head back and laughed. Then, I leaned over and gave her a kiss. I love this damn girl.

***

As the night went on, Heather and Josh were both trying to drink each other out of their minds. The two of them were getting wasted and not giving a shit about it. Heather was dancing with every guy who asked, and Josh and Lynda looked like they needed to get a fucking room.