“Let’s go back inside.”

“Yeah, go back inside, Tegan. You don’t want to mess with me. I’m a friend of your girlfriend’s.” Then he looks at me and I want to puke. “Lookin’ pretty good,

Conway. Not quite there yet, but lookin’ good. I never would have thought—”

Before I can stop him, Tegan is in front of Billy. “Walk away. Don’t say another word to her, and walk away.” There’s a fierceness in Tegan’s voice I’ve never

heard before.

“Tegan. Come on, he’s not worth it.” I hope, pray he’ll walk away. He locks eyes with me and takes a step away from Billy and toward me. That’s when Billy

swings, hitting Tegan in the jaw while he’s not looking.

I scream when Tegan charges at him. His arms go around Billy’s middle and they fall to the ground. Billy swings. I hear his fist connect with Tegan’s jaw again.

Tegan falls off of him, but recovers quickly, punching Billy in the stomach when he comes back at him.

My body is on adrenaline overload. Fear and worry colliding and crashing inside me. “Stop! Both of you stop! Do something,” I yell at Patrick.

“What do you want me to do? I don’t wanna get hit!”

Pain shoots through me when Tegan takes a punch to the gut. He counters it with a swing to Billy, hitting him in the nose, blood gushes everywhere.

“You prick! You made me bleed.”

“Leave her alone, you hear me? Stay the hell away from her.” There’s pain in his voice and it doesn’t sound physical. There’s more going on here. This isn’t just about Billy. Tegan turns to walk away again.

“Fuck you.” Billy charges Tegan. They hit the ground again, Tegan kicking Billy off of him. It’s then that the owner of Let’s Get Physical, Jim comes out.

“What the hell is going on out here?” The man is huge. Probably two Tegan’s and a Billy put together. I’ve seen him before, but not often. “Tegan! Are you

fighting outside my gym?” Easily, he steps between them. “Are you on the clock?”

“No.” Tegan spits and blood comes out of his mouth. Tears overflow my eyes.

“He works here? He’s crazy. He attacked me. I’m going to sue the hell out of him and anyone else I can. You better believe I’m pressing charges.” Despite being

bloody, Billy looks so proud of himself, I have to fight down the bile that’s built in my stomach.

“That’s not true!” I yell, running over to them. “Tegan tried to walk away, but Billy attacked him!”

“That’s not the way I remember it.”

“Yeah, me either.” Patrick agrees with Billy.

“Get the hell off my property,” Jim seethes. “You too, Tegan. You have some nerve bringing this shit to my place.”

“I work in an hour.”

“No, you don’t.”

Tegan’s eyes pop up, meeting Jim’s head on. I see his chest rise and fall he’s breathing so heavily. “Fine.”

In the background, I see Patrick, pulling a laughing Billy away.

“We’ll talk later.” Without a glance at me, Tegan turns and stalks off. I start to run after him.

“Tegan! Wait.”

He turns and looks at me and shakes his head. “I can’t right now. I’m sorry. I just…I just need to be alone.”

And then he’s gone, a trail of blood splattering on the sidewalk behind him, like breadcrumbs. Alone. I’ve never felt so alone in my whole life.

Chapter Twenty-Two

ALONE

I’ve always known news travels fast in Hillcrest, but I didn’t realize how fast until Mom comes home livid, the same night of Tegan and Billy’s fight. I haven’t let go of my cell phone all day, hoping, praying for a text or call from Tegan. I hope he isn’t hurt badly. I can’t stop wondering what I did wrong and if I somehow made him stop loving me.

“Annabel! We need to talk. Now!”

I push my empty bowl of ice cream aside, yep, ice cream. It’s always been my comfort, until Tegan was. Today, I need a little comfort. “Why? We’ve never

talked before so what’s the point now?”

She gasps and I’m a little proud of myself. “I’m going to ignore that. Can you imagine my embarrassment when three of my friends called me today to let me

know your hoodlum boyfriend attacked Betty’s son?”

There’s no point in trying to set her straight so I don’t. “No, but I’m sure you’ll tell me.” I pick up my bowl and head back to the kitchen. Of course, Mom

follows.

“I’m not sure when you decided it’s okay to talk to me like this, but I can assure you, it’s not. And I won’t have you dating someone who’s violent, Annabel. If he attacked a nice boy like Billy, he could turn that violence on you.”

I sputter, dropping the bowl to the floor, ignoring the shatter of glass. “Tegan would never hurt me. He’s not violent. Did you ever think for one minute to ask my side of the story? That maybe he was protecting me? That maybe Billy hasn’t always been so nice to me? Ninety percent of teenage boys have probably been in a

fight, Mom. It doesn’t make them violent, women-abusing jerks.”

“Your relationship with him is over and what on Earth would Billy do to you?”

I notice how she brings it up second. Her most important issue being Tegan, not the possibility Billy has ever done anything wrong to me. “Well, thank you for

your opinion, but no. I love him and I’m not breaking up with him.”

Mom’s face pales. “Oh, Annabel. You don’t love that boy.”

Heat engulfs me. “Oh, really? I wasn’t aware you know or care anything about how I feel.”

It shocks me when she steps forward. “I’m only saying this because I don’t want you to get hurt and he will hurt you, Annabel. You might think you love him, but

it’s just because he’s the first boy to ever show you attention. You’re breaking up with him. Hate me all you want, but I’m doing it to protect you.”

Ugh. I’m so tired of crying. Tired of tears and pain. Open your mouth, I tell myself. Tell her you’re tired of her assuming no one will want because you’re not

perfect. That you’re tired of not being good enough for her. But I can’t. I still can’t and it makes me hate myself even more. “I’m used to being hurt by now, Mom. I’ll take my chances.” With that, I run up the stairs and into my room. Alone again.

***

The next morning, I pull up at our spot for my jog with Tegan. He’s already there waiting for me, his arms crossed as he leans against his car. One look at him, the way his eyes are looking at the ground and not me, the way his shoulders are slumped over and I know. There’s a huge part of me that wants to put the car in reverse and pull away. If I don’t give him the chance to say it, it won’t be true, right?

But I can’t. I try and gather up any courage I can, the stuff that made me shove Pammie, the strength that helped me fall in love with him and use it to push myself out of the car. “Hi.” We usually say hey, why did I say hi?

“Hi. Sorry about yesterday.” There are too many apologies between us lately. It’s not what we’re about.

“It’s okay.” But it’s not.

“No, it’s not.”

“You’re right. I need to work on that, I guess.” It’s something else for me to add to the list. “My mom already found out. She freaked out. She wants me to break up with you.” Did I really just say that?

Tegan’s eyes close and he lets out a heavy breath. His hands are shoved deep into his pockets. Jean shorts. He’s wearing jean shorts and not basketball shorts. He always runs in basketball shorts.

I fight to keep my feet firmly planted to the ground. “Just say it, Tegan.”

He looks at me, something in his eyes I can’t decipher. Looks like pain, but if it is, why is he doing this? “Maybe she’s right…”

I knew it was coming, maybe even before the past couple days. This is what I expected, right? I never thought it would last. But still, pain pierces through my

chest with such strength I want to fall over. It spreads over me, slowly taking over my body until it’s all I feel. All I know.

“I mean, it’s not you. Not us. I still love you, but…”