We arranged that he should do this.

I told Matilda that he was coming. She seemed rather pleased. She said it would do me good to see him.

She was very friendly when he arrived. Gordon happened to be there and they were introduced; and after a short time I went back with him to Black Rock Hotel.

It was a pleasant place with a lounge overlooking the sea. The black rock, from which the hotel took its name, was very much in evidence and Richard and I sat in the lounge looking out on it.

“You will be coming home soon,” Richard was saying.

“I don’t know what is going to happen. We’re just drifting along at the moment.”

“I know. It was such a terrible shock.”

“Then there is the baby.”

“I understand that he has an excellent nanny.”

“Yes, but it is not the same, is it?”

“Isn’t it?”

“Oh, no. He has lost his mother…and he looks to me, I know.”

“Oh, I am sure he is too young to miss her.”

“In a way. But somehow…I think he needs me.”

Richard looked faintly disbelieving.

“Perhaps it is difficult for you to understand,” I began.

“Oh, no…no,” he said. “I understand perfectly how you feel. All this was so sudden, so absolutely shattering. You can’t really sort things out at first. I have been talking to your mother.”

“What did you say to her?”

“It was she who thought you should leave Cornwall and come home. She thought they might see reason down here and let the baby come with you. She said that would be by far the best for everybody, and she reckons that is what it will come to eventually.”

“I don’t know.”

“It would be the best surely. If you made up your mind…about us…well, it would only be natural that your mother should take the child.”

“He belongs down here, you see. One day he will inherit everything. His grandfather wants him to be brought up here.”

“Your mother tells me that the grandfather is rather an odd character, and she wonders if he is resisting in order to be perverse. She says she is sure that at heart he is quite indifferent about the whole matter.”

“There is, of course, Tristan’s father to be considered.”

“He’s rather a weak person, according to your mother. He goes where he’s put.”

“That’s not entirely true. But at the moment he is suffering deeply from a terrible shock.”

“Of course. But that’s enough of these people. What about you? Tell me…have you thought any more…about us?”

“I haven’t been able to think about anything but all this.”

“You’ll get over it…and then…”

“Dorabella had been with me all my life until she married. And now she’s gone, I can’t believe it. I can’t think about anything else.”

He looked crestfallen, and I fancied just a little impatient.

“I’m sorry, Richard,” I said. “It’s just impossible for me to see very far ahead.”

“I understand,” he said soothingly. “Let me tell you what is happening in London. My mother was hoping you’d come up and stay for a while. There are a lot of things she wants to show you about the house.”

“Oh,” I said faintly.

“As for Mary Grace, she is already very fond of you.”

“Did she do that portrait?”

“Yes, and it was much admired. There are two more people clamoring for her work. You see what you have already done for the family. Oh, Violetta, it can be so good, I know it can. Please, please, do think about it. I am so sure it is the right thing.”

But I was not. It was reasonable, of course, for him to think that my mother should care for the baby, but he simply did not understand. I was glad to see him, of course. But somehow it was not quite as it had seemed in London.

He told me he could stay for only two more days. He just had to be back in London by Monday and would have to leave on Sunday. It was a pity it was such a long journey.

“I’ll come down again soon,” he said. “Give me a ring when you have made up your mind. I shall be waiting for it.”

I felt that he was taking too much for granted. He could not understand my uncertainty. He seemed so sure that I was going to marry him.

I wished that I could want to. He did not seem to realize that what had happened had made me unable to make any plans. My mind was still with Dorabella. If she had died naturally, would it have been different? But I could not rid myself of the strange feeling that she was not dead, because I had not seen that she was.

It was an unsatisfactory evening and I was not sorry when the time came to drive back to Tregarland’s.

The next morning early, Nanny Crabtree came to me in some anxiety.

“I want the doctor to come and look at Tristan,” she said. “I don’t like that cold of his.”

“Why, Nanny, is he worse?”

“He’s wheezing. He’s past the sniffle stage. And now it seems to be getting onto his chest. I’d just like the doctor to see him.”

“We’ll send for him right away. I’ll give him a ring.”

She nodded. “Well, it will set our minds at rest.”

I went to see Tristan. He looked pale and lay in his cot with his eyes closed. He was certainly not his usual self, and I wanted to be there when the doctor came.

I telephoned Richard, for I had arranged for him to pick me up at ten o’clock. I was going to take him for a tour of the countryside, lunch out, and return about four, when he would drop me at Tregarland’s and collect me to take me back to the hotel for dinner.

I said that after the doctor had been here, I would call him and we would meet later.

The doctor did not arrive until eleven o’clock. He apologized for being so long. One of his patients was about to give birth and he had been delayed with her.

He examined Tristan.

“Rather a nasty chill,” he said. “Just keep him away from draughts. He should be all right in a day or so.”

Matilda, who was present, said: “Nanny Crabtree will look after him, I know.”

“That I will,” declared Nanny Crabtree.

“You know how it is with children,” said the doctor. “They are up and down. We want to make sure that it doesn’t settle on his chest. Wrap him up warm…coddle him a bit. He’ll be fine in a day or two.”

“Well, that’s a relief,” said Nanny Crabtree.

When the doctor had gone, Matilda said to me: “What about your friend?”

“I postponed our time of meeting. I will ring him now.”

“It is nearly lunchtime. Why don’t you ask him to have it with us?”

I telephoned Richard and gave him Matilda’s invitation. He accepted, but I sensed he was not very pleased. I was learning something about Richard. He hated his plans to be disrupted.

He came. It was quite a pleasant lunch. Dermot was not present. He could not face meeting people. Gordon was there and he and Richard got on well together.

By the time lunch was over, it was nearly half past two and there would not be much time for us to drive far, so we decided to sit in the gardens.

It was very pleasant there with the house behind us and the sea facing us. Paths wound down to the private beach. I could never look at that beach without imagining Dorabella down there…taking off her robe and putting it with her shoes at the top of the rock which protruded from the water so that they would not be carried out to sea.

It was not really a very satisfactory day. Richard was certainly a little put out because of the disruption to our plans, which I sensed he felt had not been necessary. The child had a cold and for that reason his brief stay here had been spoiled. He was very charming though and talked of what was going on in London. We spoke of Edward and Gretchen and the plays he had recently seen. I think he was trying to make me see what a rewarding life I should have with him. He spoke of his work and the case he was now working on. His client was accused of fraud and he was beginning to doubt his innocence.

“What happens when you are trying to convince the jury of something you don’t altogether believe in yourself?” I asked.