Tatum lets out a slow, heavy breath.  “It’s like, a desperation.  You know about what happened last year with my mom.  What I haven’t told you was that she’s been like that my entire life.  Our house had a revolving door of drugs and men, and ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always felt so helpless.  So out of control.  I didn’t have any friends.  I had no one to talk to, and I was all alone.  I think, well I know, hurting myself was my way of regaining that control.  I kept it a secret and that excited me.  It made me feel like I had something nobody else knew about, and it was mine.  It was something that couldn’t be taken away from me.”

We stare at one another, and my heart breaks for the pain this girl in front of me has been putting herself through, both physically and mentally.

“I don’t do it because I want to die,” she whispers.

“Do you think it’s less serious because of that?”

Tatum looks thoughtful, staring off over my shoulder while she contemplates her answer.  “Actually, no.  I think it’s just as serious.  Usually, I try to be so careful, but I’ve had a couple slip ups when I was just so damn angry, and I’d cut too deep.  It would scare the hell out of me, but I still couldn’t stop.  I think I’ve been secretly waiting for someone to notice all along.  I want to stop, Jacoby.  I really do.”

“You’re not going to hurt yourself anymore?  You give me your word?”

Her eyes dart away from mine and back over my shoulder.  She sighs.  “I know it’s not going to be easy.  Over the last two weeks I’ve still had the urge, but nothing ever came from it.  It’s a habit.  A bad one, like smoking or something.  I might slip up.  I can’t promise I won’t, but I’m trying.”

I roll onto my side and over the top of Tatum, bracing myself on my forearms as to not crush her.  Dropping my mouth to hers, I slant my lips and kiss her, slowly and deeply.

“That’s all I ask, Sweetheart.  We’re in this together.  Maybe we should set you up to talk to someone?”

She doesn’t break eye contact while she nods her head.  I cup her cheek affectionately.  My brave girl.  “I was thinking that, too.”

I kiss her once more before sitting up and pulling her with me.  “Oh, one more thing before we move on from this mess.  Can I ask what you were doing at the gym today?”

I hate sounding like a jealous boyfriend.  I trust Trey with my life, and I trust Tatum, too.  We may have had some problems to work out, but that doesn’t mean I don’t trust her.  But seeing her this morning has been nagging at me all day.  What was so important she had to talk to Trey but not me?”

Tatum scooches towards the edge of the bed, dropping one leg to the floor while sliding the other beneath her.  She bites her cuticle on her thumb.  Is she nervous?  My stomach plummets.

“Let me preface this by saying if I knew we’d end up here tonight, I would have waited to ask you.  But I thought we still weren’t talking, and I needed answers so I went to Trey.  I’m sorry if that’s weird.”

I reach out and pull her hand away from her delectable mouth.  She turns her palm upward, and I thread our fingers together.  “I understand.  What did you need answers about?”

“I went by your house this morning,” she begins.

“You did?”  I must have already been at the gym.

She nods slowly.  “And when I got there, this blonde was just leaving.”

My body stiffens, and my hand convulses around hers.  A blonde?  Melissa?  Oh, fuck.  “Sweetheart, I didn’t have anyone over this morning,” I answer truthfully.  Fuck, I just got her back.  Please don’t let her pull away.

“I know,” she replies, her hazel eyes moving back and forth between mine.  She must see what she’s looking for, because she blows out a breath before repeating, “I know.”

“Good.  But I’m not following.  Why did you go to Trey?”

“She left a note.  It wasn’t signed.  I didn’t have a clue who it was from, and she implied she was sleeping with you.  So I went to Trey to see if it was true.  I figured he’s your best friend so he would know.”

“She left a note.  Did Trey tell you who it was from?” I ask, because if he didn’t, I’m going to set this straight right the fuck now.  She has to know I wasn’t sleeping around on her.  For the first time in two years, it hadn’t even crossed my mind.

“It’s okay, Jacoby.  I, well, I believed Trey, which means I believe you.  You don’t have to explain what some crazy chick was doing leaving notes in your front door,” she laughs, which makes me chuckle too.

“So what did you do with the note?” I ask between laughs.  Tatum gives me the squinty eyes from hell, which causes me to laugh harder.  “I’m sorry.  I had to ask!”

“I threw it the fuck away.  Why, you want to read it?”  Her eyes are lit with fire, and I draw her to me and kiss the flames away.

“Hell no,” I whisper against her soft lips.

 “That’s settled then.  Let’s go make some phone calls before the clinic closes, and I’ll make us something to eat.”

A blinding smile graces her beautiful face, and my heart beats wildly in my chest.  I’ll never tire of putting that smile there.  That smile lights up the whole damn room.

“Sounds like a plan.”

Together, we walk hand in hand down the stairs, and the whole way down I can’t stop thinking that I’ve finally found my gift.

***

“Where are you taking me?”  Tatum asks from beside me as we drive along the highway, chasing the horizon.  We’re nearing dusk; as the sun floats below the end of the earth, the sky is painted in hues of yellow, gold, and periwinkle.  My eyes are protected from the waning rays with a pair of shades, and as I glance over at Tatum, her own eyes are hidden but an eager smile lights up her face.  She’s as breathtaking as the sunset before us.

“If I told you, it’d ruin the surprise.”

Today is Friday.  We’ve spent five magically perfect days basking in the newness of our relationship.  Monday night we laid our secrets to rest in the quiet privacy of my bedroom, and since then, our pathway has been paved with happiness.  Since Monday night Tatum has fallen asleep at night securely in my arms, and each morning after, I’ve made love to her before we get ready for school.

Her usual demeanor has been replaced with an ethereal happiness.  As much as I miss her sarcasm, the look of love in her eyes and the contentment of her smile is a hundred times better.  This Tatum doesn’t have to hide her feelings behind her sharp remarks.  Instead, she shares them with simple gestures.  A shy smile, a gentle brush of her hand when we pass in the hall, a secretive sexy text message.  Over the past week, she’s proven to me we’re in this together.  Now it’s my turn to repay the contentment she’s brought to my life.

The pieces are smoothly falling into place.  Even Wyatt has seemed to stop his ridiculous chase.  Tatum shared with me that he still texts her a few times a week, declaring to get her back, but we both know he has no chance.  She’s been staying at my place, and if I have my way, she’ll be staying with me permanently.

Somehow, I managed to convince her to leave her back alley gun at her apartment, so she doesn’t accidently shoot the fucker if he were to show up at my door.  Even though he’d deserve it, I don’t want to have to visit her in prison.  I was enraged when she bought the thing, but after spending two weeks without her, knowing he was still trying to get to her, I can’t deny I’m glad she was protected.  But I’m back, and I’d lay down my life to protect hers.  She doesn’t need it anymore.

“I hate surprises,” she grumbles.  The sound brings another smile to my face.

“Oh no.  You’ll love this one.  Trust me,” I respond while slowing the car to turn left towards the last leg of our journey.  We’ve been in the car nearly forty minutes, and I’m as antsy as she is to get there.  Maybe even more so.  “And if you hate it, we can spend all weekend in the hotel room.”