We stare at each other, my chest heaving with an embarrassing amount of movement.  Jacoby brings his hand to the back of his neck, before he shakes his head and turns, disappearing in the room full of people.  I’m left alone in the dim hallway reeling about what the hell just happened.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Jacoby

What in the hell did I just do?

I walk straight through the room full of people and out the front door seeking a breath of fresh air.  I just came on to my student.  Not only did I come on to her, I kissed her!  Again!  Although, this time I can’t feign ignorance.

And if that wasn’t bad enough, I really liked kissing her.  So much so, I’d kiss her again if I could.  Fuck.  I’ve messed everything up.

I sat at that bar watching her dance with Trey, song after song, and I couldn’t help myself from watching her body move.  I was mesmerized by the way she seemed to lose herself in the music.  And I was turned on that she seemed so oblivious to how sexy she looked doing it.  I even caught Trey checking her out a few times, and the thought made me so angry I felt as if I needed to claim her as my own.

She’s not mine!

I’m an idiot.  I took this vulnerable girl, who not two days ago was sexually assaulted, and I forced myself on her.  I’m her teacher.  She should be able to trust me.  She’s staying in my house, and I jumped on her like a horny teenager.  Am I really lacking that much in self-control?

And now, now she has nowhere to go because she’s afraid to go home, and she’s not going to want to stay with me anymore.  I took the one place she was feeling safe enough to stay, and I’ve made it awkward and uncomfortable.  So now she has to choose between risking her apartment and that Wyatt douche, or taking her chance with me kissing her again.  I seriously messed up.

I just have to make sure she knows that was a mistake.  If I convince her I had a little too much to drink and it was bad judgment, maybe then she’ll still stay with me.  Christ, that doesn’t make me look like a responsible adult.  I’ll just tell her that I’m attracted to her, but it was wrong of me to kiss her.  Fuck, she’ll never believe that.  I kick a heap of trash on the ground, watching it fly bounce off the sidewalk and roll across the lot.

I’ll just be honest with her.

As I turn around to head back inside, I’m stopped in my tracks.  Tatum is waiting for me just outside the door, watching me carefully as I pace back and forth like a lunatic.  This just keeps getting better and better.

I approach her carefully, but this time I hold my hands up in a gesture of surrender.  This is going to be fucking embarrassing.

“Tatum—I’m really sorry,” I begin, but she cuts me off.

“Why’d you do it?”

“I shouldn’t have.”

“But why did you?”

The closer I get, I can see the redness in her cheeks.  Her eyes are bright, and she’s breathing heavily.  I can’t help it, she’s turning me on.  “I did it because I wanted to.  I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have acted so impulsively.”

“Kiss me again.”

I freeze.  Certainly I misheard her.

“Excuse me?”

She takes a step towards me, and I’m torn between thoughts of rushing her or running away.  What did I get myself into?

“I said, kiss me again,” she states slowly when she’s standing mere inches from me.

My mind is racing, and I’m caught between doing what is right or what I want to do.  What kind of signals did I send her by kissing her and what kind of rejection am I going to send by turning her down?  “Tatum, I—“

She takes one step closer.  “Please.  I’m begging you to kiss me.”

I don’t know if it’s the innocence in her eyes, or the fact she’s begging me, but she crumbles my resolve.  Before I can think through my actions, I wrap my arms around her and pull her to me, crushing my mouth against hers.

She doesn’t hesitate.  Tatum pulls me into her as if she can’t get close enough, gripping the front of my coat and anchoring my body to hers.  When she lets out a small whimper, I feel as if I’m going to detonate right there, my dick getting rock hard in my jeans.  She sucks my bottom lip into her mouth, giving it a small nip with her teeth, and I shudder.  And not from the cold.  I slip my tongue into her mouth, imploring her to let me.  I become bolder, tangling it with hers, tasting her.  She tastes fucking amazing, like sweetness and a hint of vodka.

My hand begins to glide towards her ass when I remember.  I have to stop this.  This is my student.  Good God, she feels incredible, but we can’t do this.  Tatum is dangerous.  I’m like fire, and she’s the gasoline.  Just her proximity is enough for my sparks to catch.  Once that happens, it’s all over.  Together, we’re a raging inferno.

It takes all my will power but I wrench my mouth away from hers, gasping at the loss of contact.  My stomach twists when I watch her bring a shaky hand to her lips, touching them as if to gauge if this was all a dream.  It’s real, sweetheart, I want to tell her.  Fuck, that was definitely real.

“We can’t do this.  You’re my student, and it’s just wrong.  Do you understand?”

“Is it wrong?  It’s not the first time.”

“Yes, of course it’s wrong!” I shout back, feeling myself becoming angry.  Angry at myself.  Angry at her for begging me.  Angry because I want to give her everything she could ever ask for.

“Why?” she whispers, pushing me closer and closer to the edge.

“You know why,” I hiss.

“It didn’t feel wrong.”

My mouth opens and closes, but there’s nothing I can say.  I can’t admit how good it felt.  Someone has to be the voice of reason here, and clearly, she’s not up to the task.

She looks away when I don’t answer, embarrassed, but when she turns her face back to me, her resolve is set.  My stomach twists, fearful of what she’s about to say.

“I’ll find somewhere else to stay, Mr. Ryan.  Bring me to get my things, and I’ll be out of your way.”  Her tone is hard, yet void of emotion.  I know she has to be pissed, but she doesn’t sound pissed.  She just sounds…hollow.

“Tatum, no, wait.  I don’t mean that.”

“It’s exactly what you mean.  I don’t need you to tell me you felt something there.  I know you did, because I felt it too.  And if you think it’s wrong then I need to stay somewhere else, because it felt so right to me.  Nothing in my entire life has felt so right.  So please, I’m going to find somewhere else to stay.”  Before I can respond, she marches back inside.

I wait a few minutes before I follow, and I find her at the bar with Trey, tossing down another drink.  Damn him and his bad influence.  I’ll be filling him in on her situation later.  Right now, I need to get her out of here and talk her out of wanting to stay somewhere else.  I have a feeling if she had had somewhere else to go, she would have been there already instead of sticking it out with me.  I’m not sending her back to that apartment of hers so she can be afraid every night.  I’ve seriously messed everything up.

As I approach the bar, Tatum pretends to not notice me, but I see the flush rapidly creep across her neck.  It’s not until I’m perched back on my stool do I see that Trey has his hand resting casually on her thigh.  What the hell is she playing at?  I order myself another drink and sit morosely while they talk, Tatum sharing stories about her work, and Trey flirting with her incessantly in a typical Trey fashion.  I should have known better than to bring her with tonight.  This has been a disaster.

After slamming my drink, I stand up, ready to get out of this place.  Tatum and I need to talk, and we aren’t doing any of that with Trey around.  “Ready to go?” I ask her, trying to hide the frustration in my voice.

“I’m doing just fine right here.  You can go, I’ll call a cab.”

“You don’t need to call a cab.  I can give you a ride,” Trey adds.