SIR JOHN Yea, marry, let’s see Bullcalf. 170
⌈Enter Bullcalf⌉
BULLCALF Here, sir.
SIR JOHN Fore God, a likely fellow! Come, prick Bullcalf till he roar again.
BULLCALF O Lord, good my lord captain!
SIR JOHN What, dost thou roar before thou’rt pricked?
BULLCALF O Lord, sir, I am a diseased man.
SIR JOHN What disease hast thou?
BULLCALF A whoreson cold, sir; a cough, sir, which I caught with ringing in the King’s affairs upon his coronation day, sir. 180
SIR JOHN Come, thou shalt go to the wars in a gown. We will have away thy cold, and I will take such order that thy friends shall ring for thee.
⌈Bullcalf stands aside⌉
Is here all? 184
SHALLOW There is two more called than your number. You must have but four here, sir, and so I pray you go in with me to dinner.
SIR JOHN Come, I will go drink with you, but I cannot tarry dinner. I am glad to see you, by my troth, Master Shallow. 190
SHALLOW O, Sir John, do you remember since we lay all night in the Windmill in Saint George’s Field?
SIR JOHN No more of that, good Master Shallow, no more of that.
SHALLOW Ha, ’twas a merry night! And is Jane Nightwork alive? 196
SIR JOHN She lives, Master Shallow.
SHALLOW She never could away with me.
SIR JOHN Never, never. She would always say she could not abide Master Shallow.
SHALLOW By the mass, I could anger her to th’ heart. She was then a bona-roba. Doth she hold her own well?
SIR JOHN Old, old, Master Shallow.
SHALLOW Nay, she must be old; she cannot choose but be old; certain she’s old; and had Robin Nightwork by old Nightwork before I came to Clement’s Inn. 206
SILENCE That’s fifty-five year ago.
SHALLOW Ha, cousin Silence, that thou hadst seen that that this knight and I have seen! Ha, Sir John, said I well? 210
SIR JOHN We have heard the chimes at midnight, Master Shallow.
SHALLOW That we have, that we have; in faith, Sir John, we have. Our watchword was ‘Hem boys!’ Come, let’s to dinner; come, let’s to dinner. Jesus, the days that we have seen! Come, come. 216
Exeunt Shallow, Silence, and Sir John
BULLCALF ⌈coming forward⌉ Good Master Corporate Bardolph, stand my friend, and here’s four Harry ten shillings in French crowns for you. In very truth, sir, I had as lief be hanged, sir, as go. And yet for mine own part, sir, I do not care; but rather because I am unwilling, and, for mine own part, have a desire to stay with my friends. Else, sir, I did not care, for mine own part, so much.
BARDOLPH ⌈taking the money⌉ Go to; stand aside. 225
⌈Bullcalf stands aside⌉
MOULDY ⌈coming forward⌉ And, good Master Corporal Captain, for my old dame’s sake stand my friend. She has nobody to do anything about her when I am gone, and she is old and cannot help herself. You shall have forty, sir. 230
BARDOLPH Go to; stand aside.
⌈Mouldy stands aside⌉
FEEBLE By my troth, I care not. A man can die but once. We owe God a death. I’ll ne’er bear a base mind. An’t be my destiny, so; an’t be not, so. No man’s too good to serve’s prince. And let it go which way it will, he that dies this year is quit for the next.
BARDOLPH Well said; thou’rt a good fellow.
FEEBLE Faith, I’ll bear no base mind.
Enter Sir John Falstaff, Shallow, and Silence
SIR JOHN Come, sir, which men shall I have?
SHALLOW Four of which you please.
BARDOLPH (to Sir John) Sir, a word with you. (Aside to him)
I have three pound to free Mouldy and Bullcalf.
SIR JOHN Go to, well.
SHALLOW Come, Sir John, which four will you have?
SIR JOHN Do you choose for me.
SHALLOW Marry, then: Mouldy, Bullcalf, Feeble, and Shadow.
SIR JOHN Mouldy and Bullcalf. For you, Mouldy, stay at home till you are past service; and for your part, Bullcalf, grow till you come unto it. I will none of you.
⌈Exeunt Bullcalf and Mouldy⌉
SHALLOW Sir John, Sir John, do not yourself wrong. They are your likeliest men, and I would have you served with the best.
SIR JOHN Will you tell me, Master Shallow, how to choose a man? Care I for the limb, the thews, the stature, bulk, and big assemblance of a man? Give me the spirit, Master Shallow. Here’s Wart; you see what a ragged appearance it is? A shall charge you and discharge you with the motion of a pewterer’s hammer, come off and on swifter than he that gibbets on the brewer’s bucket. And this same half-faced fellow Shadow; give me this man. He presents no mark to the enemy; the foeman may with as great aim level at the edge of a penknife. And for a retreat, how swiftly will this Feeble the woman’s tailor run off! O, give me the spare men, and spare me the great ones.—Put me a caliver into Wart’s hand, Bardolph.
BARDOLPH (giving Wart a caliver) Hold, Wart. Traverse—thas, thas, thas! 269
⌈Wart marches⌉
SIR JOHN (to Wart) Come, manage me your caliver. So; very well. Go to, very good, exceeding good. O, give me always a little, lean, old, chapped, bald shot! Well said, i‘faith, Wart; thou’rt a good scab. Hold; (giving a coin) there’s a tester for thee.
SHALLOW He is not his craft’s master; he doth not do it right. I remember at Mile-End Green, when I lay at Clement’s Inn—I was then Sir Dagonet in Arthur’s show—there was a little quiver fellow, and a would manage you his piece thus, and a would about and about, and come you in and come you in. ‘Ra-ta-ta!’ would a say; ‘Bounce!’ would a say; and away again would a go; and again would a come. I shall ne’er see such a fellow.
SIR JOHN These fellows will do well, Master Shallow. God keep you, Master Silence; I will not use many words with you. Fare you well, gentlemen both; I thank you. I must a dozen mile tonight.—Bardolph, give the soldiers coats.
SHALLOW Sir John, the Lord bless you; God prosper your affairs! God send us peace! As you return, visit my house; let our old acquaintance be renewed. Peradventure I will with ye to the court.
SIR JOHN Fore God, would you would!
SHALLOW Go to, I have spoke at a word. God keep you!
SIR JOHN Fare you well, gentle gentlemen. 295
Exeunt Shallow and Silence
On, Bardolph, lead the men away.
Exeunt Bardolph, Wart, Shadow, and Feeble
As I return, I will fetch off these justices. I do see the bottom of Justice Shallow. Lord, Lord, how subject we old men are to this vice of lying! This same starved justice hath done nothing but prate to me of the wildness of his youth and the feats he hath done about Turnbull Street; and every third word a lie, duer paid to the hearer than the Turk’s tribute. I do remember him at Clement’s Inn, like a man made after supper of a cheese paring. When a was naked, he was for all the world like a forked radish, with a head fantastically carved upon it with a knife. A was so forlorn that his dimensions, to any thick sight, were invisible. A was the very genius of famine. And now is this Vice’s dagger become a squire, and talks as familiarly of John o’ Gaunt as if he had been sworn brother to him, and I’ll be sworn a ne’er saw him but once, in the Tilt-yard, and then he burst his head for crowding among the marshal’s men. I saw it, and told John o’ Gaunt he beat his own name; for you might have trussed him and all his apparel into an eel-skin. The case of a treble hautboy was a mansion for him, a court. And now has he land and beeves. Well, I’ll be acquainted with him if I return; and’t shall go hard but I’ll make him a philosopher’s two stones to me. If the young dace be a bait for the old pike, I see no reason in the law of nature but I may snap at him. Let time shape, and there an end. Exit
4.1 Enter ⌈in arms⌉ the Archbishop of York, Thomas Mowbray, Lord Hastings, and ⌈Coleville⌉, within the Forest of Gaultres