‘Doctor!’ replied the voice of Professor Penelope Holroyde. ‘Is everything OK?’
‘Yes,’ said the Doctor. ‘Well, no. Well, sort of. Bit difficult to explain, really. Listen – I know you only left us a few minutes ago from your point of view, but have you managed to start that second engine yet?’
‘Just now,’ said Professor Holroyde. ‘We’re running on full power again.’
‘Good,’ said the Doctor. ‘Then I wonder if you’d mind turning round and coming back to give us a hand with something …’
A few moments later, the radio crackled into life once again as the SS Howard Carter came into view. ‘What in the name of sanity is that?’
‘It’s called the Shroud,’ said the Doctor, racing back up to the console and grabbing the radio handset. ‘And it’s been a very naughty … er, worm. Now, can you grab the free end with your front pincers and drag it down and over the planet below?’
‘I should think we could manage that,’ said Penny.
‘Excellent!’ beamed the Doctor. ‘I’m just going to put you on hold while I check in with my other team. Doctor out.’ He held a hand over the microphone and grinned. ‘I’ve got two teams!’
Clara wagged a finger. ‘Don’t get cocky.’
The Doctor pulled a serious face and raised the radio again. ‘Come in, Wobblebottom,’ he cried. ‘How are you all doing down there?’
There was a hiss, and then the sounds of an ongoing battle emerged from the TARDIS speakers. ‘We’re holding steady,’ Wobblebottom replied. ‘But it’s not easy. We’re fighting a lot of tentacles here.’
‘There are going to be a lot more of them very soon,’ the Doctor warned. ‘But you know what to do with them.’
‘We do indeed!’
‘Good man!’ exclaimed the Doctor. ‘Doctor out.’ He spun on the spot, then raced back to the doorway to look out. In the distance, he could just make out the SS Howard Carter being buffeted around at the far end of the Shroud. ‘Penny! Talk to me …’
‘We’ve locked on, Doctor,’ said Penny. ‘But it’s trying to shake us off!’
‘Don’t worry,’ said the Doctor, turning and running back up to the TARDIS controls. ‘I’ll be with you very soon.’ He tossed the radio to Warren, then adjusted a number of dials and switches. ‘Now then, sexy,’ he crooned to the time rotor. ‘How about a quick spin around that little planet down there?’
Then he slammed the flight lever down.
The Shroud screeched as the TARDIS fell fast, looping around the far side of the dwarf planet, but the noise was soon dulled as the body of the worm splashed down into the frothy green sea.
‘It’s going to be a bit of a stretch,’ cried the Doctor as the TARDIS swooped over the top of the waves. The chain was pulling taut, and their movement slowing as they neared the other end of the Shroud, held just above the water by Penny and her team.
‘Well, the Shroud could do with going on a diet,’ said Mae with a smile.
The Doctor grabbed the radio again. ‘OK, Wobblebottom – here come the rest of the tentacles …’ Then he closed his eyes and pushed the Shroud’s feelers from his mind.
Inside the Shroud, the Clowns watched as the two ends of the tunnel were dragged closer and closer together.
The openings suddenly erupted in a seething mass of new tentacles and, at the sight of these, Wobblebottom and his team dropped their weapons. Working quickly, each Clown grabbed two tentacles – one from each end of the wormhole – and began to twist them together, just like they did with modelling balloons in their therapy sessions back home.
‘I don’t want anything fancy,’ Wobblebottom ordered. ‘No poodles or giraffes – just good, solid lock twists! This thing has to hold together for a very long time.’
The Clowns’ white gloves were a blur. They twisted the tentacles together as quickly as they could, the rubbery flesh squeaking and protesting, just like genuine balloons.
‘Has anyone else noticed the sea?’ asked Orma, dumping one pair of tentacles and quickly grabbing another.
Wobblebottom looked down to find green, soapy water washing around his oversized shoes. ‘Don’t worry,’ he said. ‘The Doctor promised to get us out of here.’
Outside, there was a splash as the far end of the chain was released and dropped into the water. Wobblebottom turned to two burly Clowns on the other side of the car. ‘With me.’
The three of them leapt over the gap from one end of the wormhole to the other. Together they hauled the heavy chain out of the sea and hammered the free end deep into the inner skin of the Shroud. ‘Just in case some of the knots don’t hold in the tentacles,’ the Clown explained.
As they re-joined their red-nosed colleagues, the tunnel began to vibrate and echo with a wheezing rasp – like a circus elephant with a bad chest. Slowly, a blue box pulsed into view.
A door opened, and the figure silhouetted in the light shining from behind reached up to adjust its bow tie.
‘Anybody fancy a lift?’
The TARDIS materialised next to the stage in the underground theatre.
Wobblebottom opened the door and stepped out to be greeted by his friends. ‘He did it!’ he called back into the ship. ‘We’re back on Semtis!’
The other door was flung open and the clown car puttered out, just about making it through the gap. It parked up beside a colourful tepee and a long line of Clowns began to climb out.
The Doctor, Clara, Mae and Warren joined Wobblebottom outside the TARDIS.
‘I’m so sorry about Flip Flop,’ said the Doctor, shaking the Clown’s hand.
Wobblebottom smiled, tears running down his cheeks and smudging his make-up. ‘He was a brave man, and a good Clown,’ he said.
Music began to play. The group looked up as another Wanter was led onto the stage and a therapy session got under way.
‘Flip Flop was the one who insisted we try to help people who had been attacked by the Shroud,’ said Wobblebottom.
‘And he did it,’ said the Doctor. ‘He helped countless people here, and billions on Earth. You should never forget him.’
Wobblebottom smiled. ‘We won’t.’
Mae and Clara said their goodbyes to the Clowns, then the Doctor turned back to the TARDIS doors. ‘Come on, gang,’ he said, sniggering to himself at the word. ‘Gang!’
‘I think I’m going to stay,’ said Warren.
The Doctor raised an eyebrow. ‘Really?’
Warren pulled a coin from his pocket and made to toss it, then instead he simply handed it to the Doctor. ‘I’m certain,’ he said. ‘There’s a lot of work to be done here, and I think I can help.’
‘It’s your decision,’ said the Doctor. ‘Oh, and I think you’d really make good use of this …’ He reached inside the doorway of the TARDIS and grabbed the Once More With Feeling.
‘Thank you, Doctor,’ said Warren. He looked up as Orma came to stand beside him and take his hand in hers.
‘That works so much better when two humans do it,’ commented the Doctor. Then, with a final glance around, he led Mae and Clara back into the TARDIS and closed the doors.
Warren, Wobblebottom and the other Clowns watched as the blue box faded away, engines rasping.
‘We’ll need to think of a new name for you,’ said Wobblebottom. ‘Warren Skeet is OK, but it’s not going to raise any smiles when folk hear it.’
Warren shrugged. ‘The kids at school always called me Skeeter …’
Wobblebottom grinned. ‘Perfect!’
Chapter 16
General Harley B. West sat up with a gasp. He was out of uniform and in bed – but this wasn’t his own bed. He was in a hospital ward.
‘Nurse!’ he cried out. ‘Nurse!’
A figure moved in the chair next to the bed, waking up from a deep sleep. It was Captain Keating.
‘Keating!’ spat the General. ‘What’s the meaning of this?’
‘Don’t get up,’ cried Keating, helping the General to lie down again. ‘The doctor says you have to get as much rest as you can.’
The General frowned. ‘Really?’
‘Certainly,’ said Captain Keating. ‘Especially after all the hard work you did ridding the country of those faces.’