Изменить стиль страницы

Alexander was staring at me with a look that I could not place.

“What is it?” I asked.

“Melissa’s not so off base,” He said softly, “I love you so much, Sil. I always have. You’re my brother’s wife. You were Oliver’s wife long before you married him, but I love you, too. It’s like this ache right here,” He rubbed his sternum, “Every now and again when I look at you or I think of you, it actually hurts. It’s been a bit disturbing the way I’ve felt sometimes,” He smiled, “Don‘t look sickened! The truth is that I’m jealous because Oliver has you through and through. I’ve never seen anybody love anybody the way you love him. I used to wonder if the hurt was because I was in love with you, too-like… like, really, really in love with you. Now I wonder if it’s not just jealousy because no one’s ever loved me like you love him. Or maybe I’m just a man who’s not used to being ignored and recognizes a woman that has always been out of his reach. Maybe deep down from time to time I’m tempted by the challenge? No matter. I’d never try. The thought of being romantic with you is just too weird,” He shuddered, “Plus I’d never do that to my brother and you’d just crush me anyway. But whatever it is, I know that I love you and it‘s obvious to Melissa as well. She takes it to a different place than we do, she makes it a bad thing. It's not a bad thing. You’re my sister, yeah? What she thinks is all wrong. Still, I’d be honoured to call you mother to my children.”

“It would be an honour to mother them, Alexander. And I love you, too.” I looked at him carefully for a second, digesting all he had said. We‘d been friends for so long that I had been aware of his affection without him telling me about it. Nothing he had said took me by any surprise. “Only it’s not confusing for me how I feel about you. It never has been.”

“I know!” He grinned, “And that’s a good thing, isn’t it? Could you imagine the mess we’d be in if it ever had been?”

It would turn out that this divorce was something that Melissa had been mulling over for nearly as long as Nigel had been alive. The plans to change the house, however, had been something Oliver had mentioned before the idea of having Alexander and the children move in had come up. Xander, however, thought it better that he and the children still keep their own home, which I thought was a bit silly.

It was only two days after Melissa gave Alexander the divorce proposal that she moved out. She left her son with his father and she rarely checked in. It was the hospital that called Alex on a Sunday afternoon five weeks later to tell him that he had a new baby daughter who was born the morning before.

Oliver and I raced to the hospital to see her. We peered at her through the nursery window. It wasn’t a good view, but there she was, our little niece, sleeping peacefully.

Oliver held a fussy Carolena. “Shush, Caro,” He tried to put the pacifier into her mouth and she spat it out, “She’s getting teeth, Love,” He told me as he peered into her mouth, “About three of them all at once from how it appears. Two on the bottom and one on top.”

“I know. She’s drooling and chewing on everything.” I wiped dirt off of Nigel’s nose, “Look at your new niece in there! Poor little baby all alone! She’s not even named!”

“Alexander won’t allow her to go anonymous for long,” Oliver peered through the glass, “Maybe she’s named and we just don’t know it.”

It was just then that Alexander rounded the corner, “Well, it’s done.”

“What’s done?” Ollie turned to his brother and asked.

“She’s signed the final papers. She’s going,” He looked down at Nigel, “And that’s that. My attorney’s faxing them over to the US tomorrow. I’ve filled out the birth certificate as well. Melissa’s agreed to leave the children with me. She didn’t really have a choice, not if she wanted to go home.” We watched a nurse enter the nursery and lift the baby into her arms. She walked out of the room with her. “And now I get to meet my daughter.”

“What name did you give her?” I lifted Nigel, who was reaching for Alex.

“I’m calling her Natalie,” Alexander looked older than his father as he stroked Nigel’s hair, “Hey, Buddy! You’ve got yourself a little sister! Natalie Christine! Want to meet her?”

He was about to say something else when the nurse came around with the baby. “Here you go, Dad!” She stopped in her step, “Doctor Dickinson!”

Alexander took a step forward and relieved her of her burden, “That’s Doctor Dickinson,” He motioned to Oliver with his head, “I’m his twin. The good looking one. Hello, Natalie, my love,” He pulled the blankets away from her chin and peered into her little face, “Hello, Muffin! It’s me, your dad! And this is Nigel! He’s your big brother! Oh, hello! You’re beautiful, aren’t you? You look just like your Mummy! So beautiful, aren’t you?” He kissed her gently and wandered off for a private moment, speaking to her in Welsh whispers.

The nurse laughed nervously, “Oh!” She said to Oliver, “I didn’t know you were a twin! Identical, too!”

“We prefer mono-zygotic, but close enough, Millie,” Oliver smiled and moved to look at the baby. “Silvia,” He called gently, “You have to see her! We have someone very special here!”

I rushed over and put my hand against Alexander's biceps. He turned and lowered her so I have a peek.

Oh, she was lovely. I’d never seen a full term baby so tiny. She was pale as snow, her pointed little head covered in thick honey coloured hair. “She’s truly beautiful,” I told Alexander, thinking she looked like one of the babies from the covers of magazines. “She’s amazing. Look at those fingers! Long and slender…she has your hands, Xander.”

“This,” Alexander whispered as tears began to stream down his cheeks. He took Natalie‘s little hand and she curled her tiny fingers around his thumb, “Is the most important woman I’m ever going to meet. This is the one who‘s going to teach me what love is all about.”

Oliver patted his brother on the back. None of us said another thing.

Even though he said he was not moving in, that night there were three babies and one Duncan sleeping in the nursery and Alexander sleeping on our sofa. It stayed that way until spring when a new top went on to the back of our little cabin. And then there were three babies and one Duncan in the nursery and Alexander sleeping in the smallest room upstairs.

I never heard another thing about Melissa until a year later when she rang us, weeping, “Silvia! It’s Melissa,” She sounded like she’s been at the pub all night, stuffed up and drunk, “Please don’t hang up on me! I know you know! How are Nigel and his sister?”

“Her name is Natalie. Didn’t you know that?”

“Yes, I knew that! It’s so pretty! Natalie. How are they?”

“They’re healthy and happy.” I wanted to hang up so badly my hand twitched, “Why don’t you speak to Alexander?”

I held the phone out at him. He was sitting in the middle of the floor playing a toy xylophone with Nattie. “It’s her, isn’t it?” He asked. I nodded. “Nigel’s out with Oliver?” I nodded again. “Jeez, it’s three in the morning stateside!” He stood up with a great sigh and took the phone. “Melissa?”

The rest of the conversation was held in hushed tones, “You want to see us? Well, I can help you with a ticket back to Wales. No. They’re babies, Mel. No. I’m not bringing them there, no way. Because I have a job. I can’t just go jumping the pond on a moment’s notice because you called. You’re working, yeah? You can come here then. Come on! Be reasonable! A toddler and a baby on a plane for twelve hours when you can come here?” There was a pause, “You did what? Well, that wasn’t very well thought out then, was it? I’m sorry. I don’t bring you up. He’s too young, he won’t get it.” He stopped speaking, obviously listening to her, “No!” He said suddenly and angrily, “Don’t you give me that shit, Melissa! They’re babies!” He sounded so sad I wanted to go over and comfort him, “Yours and mine! You left us!” Another pause, “It’s harder than you thought? Oh aye! For me as well! Don’t tell me that. It’s a lie. It’s a lie and you know it.” A half an hour later, Alexander had had enough, “This is going nowhere. I can’t do this with you. Because it hurts, that’s why. Go to a doctor, please. Please get on medication and get your life straight. Call again when you’re sober, right? Yes, I’ll answer. Yes. Goodbye, Melissa,” He hung up the phone with his head low.