She was still here.

A sound came from the back of my throat. “Don’t cry, baby. That’s not what I wanted.” I leaned in, catching the tear with my lips. “You have no idea how much you mean to me.”

Another tear snuck out and I caught that one with my thumb. “I didn’t sleep with her,” I blurted out like a total fucking idiot.

Syd blinked. “What?”

My cheeks heated. “I didn’t sleep with Mindy—the chick who was at my apartment. I didn’t sleep with her, Syd. I know that doesn’t change much of anything, but I didn’t.”

That only made her cry harder, and I didn’t really know what to do. I’d fucked up more than I’d realized and bigger than I’d feared. She tried to turn her head, but I held her face in a gentle yet firm grip. An ache formed in my chest.

The same ache I’d felt when she’d started dating Nate in high school.

So I did the only thing I could think of—the only thing I wanted.

I kissed her.

Chapter 14

Sydney

At first I didn’t know if he was kissing me to get me to stop crying or if there was another motive behind it. A really strange way to do it, but it worked. I stopped crying, because I just stopped thinking. He was kissing me. Years of wondering what this would be like and yearning for this moment had passed, and now his lips were on mine.

And it was such a soft, tender kiss that reached deep inside of me and stole my breath, and then my heart. But Kyler had always had my heart.

His lips brushed mine once, and then twice. I sucked in a sharp breath and my hands fell to his waist. A deep sound emanated from him, and it rumbled through every part of me, eliciting a series of shivers that skated over my skin. The pressure against my lips increased and his hands slid off my cheeks, delving deep into my hair. He slanted his mouth as he tipped my head back, his teeth tugging on my lower lip, coaxing my mouth to open.

My heart sped up so fast I thought it would come out of my chest. My fingers tightened around the soft material of his hoodie, and a small moan escaped me as his tongue flicked over mine. The kiss deepened, and I’d never been kissed like this before—like he was thirsting for the very taste of me. It left me spinning. An ache blossomed deep within me, starting in my heart and spreading like the sweetest fire possible.

Kyler pulled back as his hands slid down to the sides of my face again, cradling my cheeks. His lips brushed mine as he spoke. “Do you get it now?”

I could barely breathe as my eyes fluttered open. “Get what?”

He slanted his head, lining up our mouths once more. “You.”

“Me?” I shuddered as our lips brushed again.

“This is what you deserve.” He pressed a kiss against my lower lip, and I knew at that point I must’ve cracked my head on something and was dreaming, because this couldn’t be real. “And this,” he added, his hands drifting to my shoulders. He pulled me against him, until I was pressed so tightly I could feel every inch of him. “You don’t deserve what you wanted in that sunroom, baby.”

His tongue swept past my parted lips, and I kissed him back like I had dreamed of doing for years. He groaned as his hands snuck to my hips. When he lifted his head again, I was panting. “What else do I deserve?”

One side of his lips tipped up. “Everything, baby, you deserve everything.”

My heart swelled so much that I thought I’d float right up to the ceiling, but confusion trickled in, threatening the happy bubble building in me. “Kyler, I…I don’t understand.”

A dimple appeared in his right cheek as his smile spread, and my heart flopped over heavily. “Then you really don’t get it yet. I think I’m going to have to educate you.”

A thrill coursed through me. The old saying “never look a gift horse in the mouth” was screaming at me right now. Go with it, I told myself. Just go with it. Don’t freeze up. Don’t mess this up, whatever this was. I didn’t want to look back and regret that my mouth and endless questions got in the way. “Educate me?”

“Mmm-hmm,” he murmured, angling his body so our hips pressed together. “By the time I’m done, you will completely understand what I mean. And I think we’ll start with this sweater.”

“The sweater?”

Kyler nipped at my lower lip, and I gasped. “I like the sweater. The color is good on you. Perfect.” He picked up a strand of my hair that had fallen across my chest and draped it over my shoulder. “But you know what I like best about this sweater?”

“What?”

His lashes lifted and his stare pierced me. Tension stirred and coiled tightly within me. The heat in his intense gaze told me I was so, so out of my league with him. The dimple disappeared into a knowing smirk as he slid his fingers under the hem of my sweater. “Figure it out yet?”

I shook my head.

“Hmm…” That low grumble of his had me wanting to knock him flat on his back. His fingers spread across the bare skin of my stomach and my breath caught as they pressed into my ribs. His head cocked to the side and his brows lowered. “Syd, are you not wearing a bra?”

Before I could answer, his hands drifted up further, until the fingertips brushed the swells of my breasts. “You’re not. Very naughty, Syd.”

My lips twitched. “Not like I need—”

“Don’t say it.” His lips captured mine in a long, searing kiss. “Back to the sweater.”

“The sweater?” I repeated dumbly.

He nodded, and for a moment the only sounds in the room were my pounding heart and the crackling of the fire. “The best part about this sweater, other than the fact you look fucking hot as hell in it, is that it comes off.”

Oh, hot damn.

Kyler tugged the sweater off and dropped it on the floor. There was something much more intimate about this than earlier. Even in the shadowy room, I felt more exposed. His gaze traveled from my face and down my throat to my breasts. The tips hardened under his gaze.

He scooped up my hair, framing my chest with its long strands. “Now that we’re past the sweater, let’s talk about these.” His voice was gruff and thick. “These are absolutely perfect.”

With him staring at me like that, I’d never been more proud or happy about my breasts in my life. True story.

He bent his head and the edges of his hair tickled my chest. His lips were so close that I thought I’d die from the anticipation. He kissed one of the small cuts and another, then his lips closed over the tip. Pounding need took root. His hands splayed across the small of my back as he moved to the other breast and suckled deep.

“Perfect,” he said again, and his tongue flicked over the tightened nubs, teasing until I grasped his shoulders, my back arching. He straightened, staring down at me. “You know what’s next?”

My imagination had many answers for that, but I hooked my fingers under the hem of his hoodie. His wide smile, the kind that showed off the dimples in both cheeks, was my reward. He lifted his arms, and off went the hoodie and the shirt underneath.

His chest seemed more flawless now than I remembered. The hard planes of his chest and the dips of his stomach and all that golden skin beckoned me. I leaned into him, biting down on my lip as our skin touched. The cuts were a little sensitive, but it was nothing compared to the other sensations. A shudder rolled through me, and his head dipped to my shoulder. He placed a kiss there, and emotion clogged my throat.

“You’re learning fast. I’m not surprised.” He trailed kisses up my throat, stopping just below my ear. His hands moved between us, thumbs smoothing over the tips of my breasts. “You’ve always been so damn good at everything you do.”

“Not everything,” I admitted with a blush. “This…I’m not good at this.”

Kyler pulled back, one brow arched. “You are amazing at this.”