they want to be whole

They’d found Jerry. They would have me, too. I knew they would, before long.

Five minutes from Pat’s, I pounded on Heather’s front door, flashlight in hand. Her porch light was on, but the house lay in almost complete darkness—a light was on in the back and the TV flickered in the living room. I went to a window, squinted inside, and shined the flashlight. I saw no movement except for the shifting and sliding of shadows.

I panicked. I’m not proud or brave or particularly heroic. At that point, I could have still been very, very wrong. When I blinked, I saw Jerry’s face when I dropped him off at his place, his eyes wide and scared. He tried to tell me, then. He sent me a message before they found him. Before they killed him. They found him in Heather’s crawl space. He found them in the basement under his rented house here in the city. Under his childhood home. They found him. They were coming. Like I said, I panicked. I tried Heather’s door again. I lowered my shoulder and lunged. The wood groaned. I lunged a second time, and the wood cracked. I brushed sweat from my face. I used my foot on the third assault, kicking at deadbolt with the bottom of my shoe. It took two more poundings, but the jamb split and I tumbled inside.

A humid, dirty smell clung to everything. A basement smell. The air was hot. I flipped on the switch next to the door.

“Heather?”

No answer. She wasn’t in the living room, or either bedroom. The tiny light I’d seen from the front window came from in the back, from the little hallway behind her bathroom. From the hallway with the trapdoor to her crawl space. The TV was on, mumbling in the background. I chewed on my tongue. I saw images from newspaper clippings, odd hieroglyphs, hand-drawn layouts of ancient cities, buried monuments. Jerry’s hand-scrawled words, they’re down there if we dig deep enough, written in the margin of a magazine article. I clicked off the television as I walked through the room.

they want to be whole

A broken glass lay on the floor of Heather’s kitchen along with a sticky pool of orange juice. A few spatters of blood—dark and thick—marred the cabinets and bathroom door. I found more blood on the floor, soaked into black dots across the carpet. I followed the dots. I traced them to the closet, to the door in the floor. The house listened, too quiet. Waiting. I held my breath for the sound of something, anything. Whatever sound they might make. A tiny piece of cloth protruded from under the trap door in the back room, and the edge of the torn and jagged cloth was stained with blood.

A moment passed. Another, silent, heavy moment in which the house listened for my next breath. What did I do? What could I do? Go down there, under her house, where she never went? I imagined they had her, dead perhaps, mutilated like Jerry. Or something else? The police had found Jerry’s body on his bed. Heather was gone. How much of her would they take to be whole? In a cold moment surrounded by the sour air of my colleague’s house, they broke me. I broke. I’m not proud or brave or even the slightest fraction heroic. I left with Jerry’s scrapbooks, a duffle bag full of clothes, and emptied what I could from the bank ATM.

I’m anxious now, always on edge, especially in strange beds. Motels away from major highways. Spots on the map which seem isolated from the locations indicated in Jerry’s research. Sleep doesn’t come easy. Waking hours don’t come easy. Where on earth, can a man hide from the dead? Where can any of us hide when the unhappy legions stir from their moldering tombs?

Acknowledgements

“Cargo” was originally published in Blade Red: Dark Pages Volume 1, edited by Brenton Tomlinson

“Tesoro’s Magic Bullet” was originally published in Nossa Morte, edited by Michael De Kler

“The Way of Things in Fly Over Country” was originally published in Dead Worlds: Undead Stories, edited by Anthony Giangregorio

“Former Vocations” was originally published in Vicious Verses and Reanimated Rhymes, edited by A.P. Fuchs

“The Distillery” was originally published in Necrotic Tissue#10, edited by R. Scott McCoy

“In the Primal Library” was originally published in Three Crow Press/Morrigan e-zine

“Sea of Green, Sea of Gold” was originally published in Day Terrors, edited by Kfir Luzzatto and Dru Pagliassotti

“Bona Fide King of His Realm” originally appeared in Everyday Weirdness

“Down There” originally appeared in Crossed Genres, edited by Kelly Jennings and Kay T. Holt

“Familiar Faces” is original to this collection

As always, thank you for reading.