"Surely the time has come, Papa. Once I leave, it won't be as easy for you to arrange passage. Shall we set the date?"

"I suppose we should," I said reluctantly.

"Unless you have some compelling reason to stay longer?" He frowned. I was keeping something from him, and he knew it.

"No. Let's set a date and stick to it."

"Good. There's a ship leaving for Rome the day after tomorrow."

I bit my lip and felt a dull pain in my chest. "Very well. I'll be on it."

The next day, which was to be my last full day in Alexandria, I went to the market alone. I arrived very early and stayed there all day. The vendors shook their heads; they were beginning to think I was mad. The old priestess and the other woman never appeared.

The next morning, Rupa and the boys were up early, ready to board the ship for Rome. My trunk was packed. All was ready.

Meto had promised to escort us to the pier. He arrived beaming with excitement. "Can you believe it, Papa? I'm going with you! Caesar's sending me back to Rome. He needs someone to deliver a dossier to Marc Antony, and he says there's no one better for the job. But the fact is, I think he's rewarding me with a trip home in return for… well, for a certain amount of unpleasantness that you and I had to endure. It's a good thing you postponed your trip so long, after all, because now I can go with you!"

"Yes, wonderful news," I said, trying to muster some enthusiasm. I could see that Meto was disappointed by my reaction. We proceeded to the harbor.

The sky was cloudless. A favorable wind blew from the south, carrying the dry, sandy smell of the desert. The boys ran onto the deck, despite Meto's caution that they would have to behave themselves aboard a military vessel. Rupa, assisted by one of the sailors, carried my trunk aboard. I lingered on the pier.

"It's time, Papa," said Meto. "The captain's called for everyone to step aboard."

I shook my head. "I'm not going."

"What? Papa, there's no reason for you to stay. I don't understand. Think of Diana! You must be eager to see the baby-"

"Rupa!"

Rupa sat on the trunk he had just carried aboard, catching his breath. He sprang up and came to me.

"Rupa, you have the key to the trunk, don't you?"

He nodded and reached into his tunic to show me the key, which hung from a chain around his neck.

"Good. Open the trunk. On the very top you'll see a leather bag with coins in it. Bring it to me; I'll need some money."

Meto shook his head. "You're actually going to stay, aren't you?"

"Yes."

"But why, Papa? If there's something you must do, let me stay and help you. Or at least keep one of the boys with you, or Rupa-"

"No! The thing I do, I must do alone."

Rupa opened the lid of the trunk. Mopsus and Androcles, with a look of alarm, came running, and a moment later I saw the reason: Peering over the edge of the trunk, his green eyes open wide and his silver collar gleaming in the sunlight, was Alexander the cat.

I raised an eyebrow. "Kidnapping a sacred feline from the royal palace! If Queen Cleopatra finds out, she's liable to throw a couple of slave boys into the harbor."

"Then I suppose the queen must never know," said Meto, smiling crookedly. "I'm sure the captain won't mind; a cat will kill any rats on the ship."

Rupa returned with the bag of coins and handed it to me. Mopsus and Androcles carefully shut the lid of the trunk and looked around the deck to make sure no one else had seen the stowaway.

I embraced Meto, then stepped back. "Look after the others on the journey home, Meto. And when you see Diana, and Eco…"

"Yes, Papa, what shall I tell them? They don't yet know about Bethesda. What shall I say about her? What shall I say about you?"

"Tell them the truth, as far as you can. Sometimes, Meto, the truth must suffice."

"Diana will be distraught when she finds out about her mother. And am I simply to say that you refused to leave Egypt?"

"Tell them I love them; they know that already. Tell them I shall come home as soon as I can… if the gods wish it to be so."

The captain of the ship gave a final call for all to board. Sailors hurried about the deck, preparing to cast off. Never taking his eyes from me, Meto stepped aboard. Rupa and the boys stood beside him. As the ship moved away from the dock, they stared at me in puzzlement.

The ship drew away. Their faces grew smaller and smaller until I could no longer read their expressions. I lifted my eyes to the great lighthouse that towered above the harbor, and thought of the first glimpse I had seen of its flame that night aboard the Andromeda, with Bethesda, before the storm struck and swept away all our expectations.

CHAPTER XXXI

I paid a call on Queen Cleopatra. To my surprise, I was admitted to her presence almost at once.

She reclined upon a purple couch strewn with gold cushions. Slaves fanned her with ostrich feathers. The gown she wore was loose and flowing, but did not conceal the fact that she was great with child.

"Gordianus-called-Finder! I thought you were leaving Alexandria for Rome today, along with that irksome son of yours."

"I was supposed to go, Your Majesty. I changed my mind."

She raised an eyebrow. "You've come to visit me instead?"

"Your Majesty once spoke to me of the special circumstances attendant upon a death in the Nile."

She peered at me and nodded slowly. "Those who perish in the Nile are blessed by Osiris. He embraces the ka even as the currents and eddies of the river embrace the hollow reed of the body."

I shook my head. "All this talk of the sacred Nile! I've seen the Nile. I wandered up to my neck in its muddy waters, searching for Bethesda's body. I felt the ooze of the bottom suck at my feet. I smelled the stench of rotting plants along the steaming bank. There's nothing beautiful about the Nile. It's fetid, smelly, dark, and dank! The Nile brings death."

"Yet it also brings life!" Cleopatra placed her hand upon her swollen belly. "Some men-squeamish, ignorant fools!-make the same complaints about the sacred delta between a woman's legs. And yet, from that place comes new life. Silly men, turning up your noses at the slippery fluids and strong odors of fertility! You'd rather play with your hard, shiny swords and spears, and watch the blood spurt from each other's wounds! Yes, the Nile is all you say it is-a vast, endless expanse of sluggish water and oozing mud. It spills across Egypt, bringing life and death wherever it goes. That's what gods do. They give life. They give death-and life after death."

"So you say; those who perish in the Nile are reborn. But are they ever resurrected?"

"What do you mean?"

"Do they ever walk again in this world?"

She looked at me darkly. "Are you thinking of my brother? It's true, his body was never located, but-"

"There was another whose body was never found."

She knitted her brow, then nodded. "Your wife?"

"Yes."

"Why do you ask such a question, Gordianus?"

"Let me ask another. You told me you know the old priestess at the temple outside Naucratis."

"I've visited the temple. I've met her."

"Is it possible that I might have seen her here in Alexandria, in one of the markets?"

"She's very old, but there's no reason she shouldn't travel to the city if she wishes. Even a priestess must gather provisions. But if you'd merely seen the priestess, you wouldn't be asking me these questions, would you? You saw someone else."

"I saw a woman with the priestess. So did Rupa. But we didn't see the same woman. He saw his sister, Cassandra, whose ashes he scattered in the Nile. I saw… Bethesda. That makes me think…"

"That neither of you saw a woman you truly recognized."