"Let someone else do it for a while." He pulled her with him to sit on the edge of the bed, his strength fading. He slipped his arm around her shoulder, drawing her close to him, and she did not shrug away "You've carried your share. Stop running for a while."

"What makes you think I'm running?"

"We have that in common," Vahanian replied.

"We're not that much alike."

"No? Let me see. Stubborn, willful, driven, self-sufficient, arrogant, and damn good at what we do." His lip twisted wryly. "You're right. Nothing in common."

"Was that supposed to make me feel better?"

Vahanian shook his head, wincing at the effort. "No. That takes time. But as you're so fond of telling me, you have to let the healer close enough to heal."

"Sakwi isn't up to any more than he's done already."

"I wasn't thinking of Sakwi," Vahanian murmured, close enough now that she could feel his breath. "There was something I promised myself in the Nargi camp, if I lived through it."

"What was that?" Carina murmured.

"This," he said, lowering his mouth to hers. For an instant she hesitated. Then she leaned into him, surprised at herself even as she returned the kiss with gentle fervor. A moment later he drew back, and she thought he looked both pleased and a little astonished.

"I love you, Carina," Vahanian said, tilting her chin up to look her in the eyes. "Last night, in the camp, I didn't want to go to the Lady, leaving it unsaid."

Carina felt tears start down her cheeks, but she did not look away. "I love you, too," she whispered, her voice choked. "I've wasted so much time, being afraid—"

He kissed her again, cutting off her words, reluctant to draw away until he began to sway as his strength failed.

"I really ought to be going back downstairs," she stammered, completely at a loss.

Vahanian made no attempt to hold her back, but his eyes searched hers. Carina had the uncomfortable feeling that he could see right past her defenses. She helped him lay back down.

"Come back soon. Don't be afraid," he murmured, looking as if he were about to pass out. "Your virtue is quite safe."

Carina blushed. "Considering where we are, that's saying something. Now get some sleep, before I have to re do what I did last night. When I come back up, I'll see what I can do about the damage that's left."

Vahanian took her hand and pressed the back of it against his lips. "As you wish, m'lady," he said, his eyes closed. She sat with him until he fell asleep again, and while her heart was still thudding, she found that the sense of relief at the confession seemed to push her fears far away, at least for today.

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

Everyone but Vahanian and Carina gathered in the back room late that afternoon to bid the Goddess's blessing to Sakwi. Outfitted for a long ride, the thin mage accepted their well-wishing graciously, politely disagreeing with Tris about resting longer before striking out on the dangerous trek to Eastmark.

Tris watched the mage with mixed emotions. He was grateful for the possibility that Sakwi might be able to persuade the Eastmark king to ally against Jared. Yet he knew with Sakwi's departure, the burden of the success of the journey fell even more heavily on his own shoulders. I'm not ready. There's so much left to learn.

Sakwi stepped to the edge of the brush along the river. In the dimming sun, Tris saw a large stag among the bushes, a powerful animal with antlers that spoke of a long and cunning life. Sakwi murmured something that Tris did not quite hear and the stag moved closer, awaiting the mage's needs. With a wave of farewell, Sakwi hoisted himself onto the stag's back. Making the sign of the Goddess, he leaned forward and clung tightly to the beast as it bounded off.

"You know," Kiara said to Tris, "every time I think I've seen it all, I get another surprise. There's never a dull moment."

"Stick around. The fun's just starting." He looked around them. "Has anyone seen Carina?"

"Jolie brought a note down from Carina asking that someone sit with Jonmarc tonight." Kiara shrugged. "I imagine Carina's finally getting some sleep. Goddess bless, she deserves it."

"It'll be a few more days until Jonmarc can even think about sitting a horse. I guess we might as well make ourselves comfortable."

Kiara's expression made it clear that she did not consider the delay unacceptable. "We could all use the rest. Especially you. Although I know what you're thinking. Every day that goes by makes it closer to the Hawthorn Moon."

They followed the others back into Jolie's place. The back room had become a place for Tris and his companions to make their plans and preparations in private, avoiding the curiosity of the gamers and guests in the front rooms. That they had not already been carried away in chains bound for Shekerishet gave Tris confidence in Jolie's repeated reassurance of her discretion. He still found it impossible to relax.

Nyall, too, seemed uneasy with the delay. Tris imagined that the river pilot's anxiousness lay in his wish for his part in the adventure to be at an end. Nyall spent his days testing and improving the new boat Jolie had helped him secure, building a corral for the horses and checking the boat's maneuverability in the swift river. He went to bed early, looking for any excuse to flee from the back room after dark. Now that the river ghosts' early reticence was gone, they sought Tris's intercession on a nightly basis. Even Jolie seemed taken aback at the spirits that came to Tris for his help in resolving old business or making the passage to the Lady.

Although the Sisterhood had assured Tris that his mediation would not draw Arontala's attention and would help to ease the imbalance in the currents of magic, Tris still felt vulnerable. He woke each morning surprised and grateful to find no Margolan troops waiting outside their door.

"If Sakwi isn't here, I guess we're on our own to pick a safe path across Margolan," Kiara nibbled on some fruit and bread.

. "Looks that way," Tris agreed. He rested a boot on the bench across from her and leaned forward to take a wedge of cheese from the bowl Jolie kept well-filled. "Here's hoping Ban can recruit some deserters, and that Harrtuck can bring a little pressure on the northern border. I'll feel better thinking that Jared's attention is on something other than me."

Kiara chewed thoughtfully. "Do you think Jared expects you to challenge him?"

"He went to a lot of trouble hiring assassins. Having me dead would give him one less reason to watch his back."

"You've certainly got Arontala's attention."

"That's more than enough to worry me. Now the question is—can we drop out of sight long enough for them to get careless?"

"It's a risky thing to count on."

Tris grimaced. "It's all risky."

A day later, Vahanian made his way down the stairs to join them. It was more bravado, Tris thought, than an indication that the fighter was truly ready for action. Two days later, against Carina's strident protests, Vahanian proclaimed himself ready to ride if not to fight. He would hear no more of going back to bed to recuperate.

Although Tris chafed at the delay, he had to admit that the rest had made a visible difference in Carroway, who looked to be himself again. Something had also changed between Carina and Vahanian in the wake of Vahanian's close call. The two were now clearly a couple. Tris was glad for them. While the road afforded no real privacy and few enough opportunities for conversation, he knew how much it meant to him to have Kiara.

By the Dark Lady, Tris thought tiredly, I guess the journey is getting to all of us. Only a complete fool would be unafraid.