I held up a hand for silence. “All right, I get it. I just don’t know what we can do about any of it.”

“First off,” said Raphael, “you can bring those of us who aren’t quite in the know up to speed on everything that’s going on.”

I didn’t feel up to that, and I was insanely grateful to Adam for taking on the responsibility himself. I let my eyes glaze over as he talked. This morning’s numbness was seeping back into my system, shutting down my emotions—and a lot of my reasoning power.

Do you need me to take over for a while? Lugh asked.

For the briefest moment, the offer actually tempted me. I could let Lugh send me to some secluded place, where I didn’t have to interact with anyone, where I didn’t have to think, where I didn’t have to feel.

The fact that the offer tempted me was enough to shock me out of the creeping numbness. I was a fighter, damn it! I wasn’t going to crawl away and hide.

When I focused my mind on my surroundings once more, it was to find everyone staring at me expectantly.

Adam asked if you have any idea who the demon who’s after you could be, Lugh said.

Thanks for clueing me in, I responded. At least one of us had been paying attention.

“I’ve exorcized probably hundreds of demons. I don’t know why any one of them would hold more of a grudge than any other one.”

“Is there someone who was in a particularly sweet situation when you came around to kick him out?” Raphael asked.

I shook my head. “Keep in mind that by the time I’m called in, the demon is already toast. If I or another exorcist can’t cast him out, he’s either dead or imprisoned for the life of his host. I can’t see any reason why they’d hold me responsible.” I looked up at Saul. “Did you blame me when I exorcized you?”

He didn’t answer immediately.

“Let me rephrase that,” I said, strangely stung by his silence.

“No, don’t bother,” Saul said. “I did blame you in a way, but that’s just because I was angry at the world in general. If I were out for revenge, I’d be hunting down the God’s Wrath fanatics who beat me, not you.”

“The ones who are still alive, you mean,” Raphael needled. It was a low blow. Saul hadn’t meant to kill any of his attackers, had just been trying to escape.

Saul’s eyes blazed, his demon shining through. I was the only one who seemed to notice this, but then, I was the only one in our circle who could read auras. Usually I had to be in a trance to do it, but I’d seen this demon eye-shine more than once, and I knew it wasn’t my imagination. I tensed, afraid there was about to be a fight, one it would be beyond my power to stop.

To my shock, however, Raphael didn’t respond to the flare of aggression, instead lowering his gaze.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I shouldn’t have said that.”

Saul looked at him with all the trust he’d give an angry cobra. “You’re apologizing? You never apologize.”

“That’s because no one ever accepts my apologies.” Ah, now that was more like the usual Raphael— whiny self-pity.

Though considering my current state of mind, I wasn’t in a position to throw stones.

Tell my brother it’s because it’s hard to tell if his apologies are sincere.

Oh, yeah. This was so something I wanted to get in the middle of. Not!

“Let’s just move on, shall we?” I suggested.

Saul leaned back in his chair, looking stubborn and angry. But at least he refrained from stirring the hornets’ nest.

“I’m still sorry,” Raphael said softly, before he, too, sat back and subsided.

“The point was that it’s really weird for a demon to hold this kind of a grudge against an exorcist,” I said. “I don’t know how to begin guessing who it could be.”

“We’re pretty sure he’s currently residing in the intern who supposedly found the body, right?” Saul inquired.

“Yeah.” I got the feeling there was supposed to be a follow-up, but Saul grimaced and stared at his feet instead of continuing.

“Since everyone already thinks I’m the world’s worst bastard,” Raphael said, wearing a mocking smirk that I was beginning to think was a mask for some inner pain, “I’ll finish my son’s thought. The obvious solution is to send the son of a bitch back to the Demon Realm again.”

“I didn’t mean it the way you’re making it sound!” Saul protested. “I wasn’t ever going to suggest we kill anyone.”

Raphael raised an eyebrow. “Then why did you suddenly become so shy?”

The glow was back in Saul’s eyes. “I just started thinking about all the logistical issues with capturing a hostile demon and holding it still long enough for an illegal exorcism.”

Raphael nodded. “And following that thought to its logical conclusion—which is it would be a hell of a lot easier to just kill the host.”

“No!” Saul shouted. He leapt to his feet and lunged after Raphael, who remained seated.

Adam had apparently been on the lookout for such an eventuality, for he managed to grab hold of Saul before he reached Raphael. Saul then whirled on Adam with a snarl, which Adam didn’t seem to appreciate. They grabbed each other’s shirts, both sets of eyes blazing now. I flinched, sure one of them was about to hit the other and then all hell would break loose.

Moving slowly and carefully, Dominic sidled up to them and put one hand on each man’s shoulder. “Let’s take it down a notch, shall we?” he said, his voice low and gentle.

They both turned to look at him. If it had been me, I’d have let go and backpedaled. Saul and Adam were both scary-looking when they were mad. But Dom wasn’t intimidated by either of them, and he didn’t back down.

“It’s not each other you’re mad at,” Dom reminded them.

Raphael still hadn’t risen from his chair, and now he released a little breath of air that may have been a choked-off laugh. “Gee, thanks, Dominic. Sic them both on me.”

By now, I’d had enough. “Everyone sit down and shut up! I’m not in the mood to deal with all this macho chest-pounding bullshit.”

Dominic smiled at me. “Always the diplomat.”

I shrugged. “Your way wasn’t working.”

Adam and Saul let go of each other’s shirts and moved apart. Saul seemed to have regained his composure, but Adam bared his teeth at Dominic.

“Don’t ever get between two angry demons again!” he snapped.

Dom wasn’t any more intimidated now than he had been before. “I wasn’t between you,” he said mildly.

“Listen to Adam, bud,” Saul said as he returned to his seat. “We couldn’t have hurt each other if we’d tried. Not really. You, on the other hand …”

Dom dismissed that with a wave of his hand. “You wouldn’t have hurt me.”

“Not on purpose,” Saul agreed.

I suppose Dom got the point, because he didn’t argue anymore.

Saul grinned. “I’m sure Adam will ‘explain’ the error of your ways later,” he said with a waggle of his brows. Then he looked at Adam. “Give him a few lines of ‘explanation’ for me while you’re at it.”

Dominic blushed and returned to his seat.

Ick. Maybe it was better when they were fighting. I didn’t voice that opinion, and I breathed a sigh of relief when everyone was again peacefully seated.

“For the record,” I said, “we’re not killing anyone. Got it?” I let my eyes roam over all of them, though I skipped right over Brian. I saw various expressions of acquiescence or annoyance, but no one contradicted me. I let my gaze rest a little extra long on Raphael. He was the loose cannon among us, the one who might disregard orders. But he just shrugged.

“So,” Adam said, “the plan is to grab the intern and do an illegal exorcism, right?”

He was looking at me, so I nodded. Then I frowned. “But if we send him back to the Demon Realm, what’s to stop him from coming right back?”

It was Raphael who answered. “The only way to stop him for sure is to kill him.”

“No!” I said. “Killing the intern is already off the table as an option. And I sure as hell am not sitting by and letting you guys burn him alive.” Which was what it took to actually kill a demon on the Mortal Plain. I had more than one gruesome death on my conscience already. I refused to entertain the idea of adding another.