12

Charles and Susan were parked near us, so they walked us to our car. This meant I didn’t get a chance really to say anything to Peter until I was belted into the passenger seat, but once there the first item on my agenda was to call Luisa and tell her to grab Ben and meet us at the Martin Luther King memorial.

“We’re in the middle of dinner. We haven’t even had dessert. Why do we need to come meet you?” she demanded. “Are you in the mood for a soft pretzel? Do they sell soft pretzels at all American monuments? Do you expect me to rush through dinner and traipse all over town just because you need a soft pretzel? And then do you expect me to clean up after you when you spill mustard everywhere?” Judging by her tone, she was rapidly sinking into her own pit of withdrawal-triggered despair, and her pit sounded even deeper and darker than my pit.

“Martin Luther King, Jr., gave his ‘I Have a Dream’ speech at the Lincoln Memorial during a Civil Rights march in the sixties. So it’s possible the keychain of the Lincoln Memorial was meant to lead us to his own memorial,” I explained patiently. My withdrawal symptoms had only intensified during the course of the day, but I’d had more time than Luisa to adjust to feeling lousy. I also had a little thing like finding out about Peter’s fifteen-year relationship with his perfect match to distract me from any physical discomfort.

“What does that have to do with Hilary?” she asked.

“I don’t know. Probably nothing. But we might as well check it out.”

“I guess we don’t have anything better to do,” she agreed after extensive coaxing on my part. “And we can catch you up on what we’ve learned once we see you.”

I hung up the phone and looked over at Peter, who was doing his best not to run over any jaywalking pedestrians.

“They’re going to meet us there?” he asked.

“Yes, although Luisa sounded a bit grumpy about it.”

“Withdrawal?”

“I hope so. Otherwise she’s in the worst mood of her life for no good reason.”

He laughed, seemingly unaware that we were about to have a very serious discussion.

“Is there something you forgot to tell me?” I asked sweetly, opting for the passive-aggressive approach.

“What?” he said, swerving to avoid a group of tourists in matching orange visors. “Oh, right-my call from Alex. He says he wasn’t at the Four Seasons, and he’s pretty sure he doesn’t have any identical twins from which he was separated at birth. We also talked about a game of doubles tomorrow, around lunchtime.”

“Doubles?”

“Caro left a message earlier suggesting the same thing-they both thought it would be fun for us all to get together.”

“Doubles as in tennis doubles? At lunch?” People were supposed to eat during lunch, not dress up in silly outfits to whack at things with glorified butterfly nets.

“Caro can lend you a racket and something to wear. I told them I’d get back to them. I wanted to make sure you were up for it and that we had the entire Hilary thing resolved. By the way, did you like how I covered with my parents? I figured you’d rather they thought we were sightseeing tomorrow than doing what we’ll probably be doing.”

“That was good,” I acknowledged, but mostly I was amazed at the easy way he bandied Caro’s name about, as if their relationship was something we’d discussed thoroughly and laid to rest long ago, and as if there was nothing I’d rather do than borrow her clothes to play a sport I’d been officially declared incapable of learning by more than one professional instructor. A mental image of Caro in tennis whites, blond, tan and radiating athletic prowess, next to me in tennis whites, not blond, not tan and radiating athletic incompetence, flashed before my eyes, and my half of the picture wasn’t pretty.

Since passive-aggressive hadn’t worked, I discarded the passive part and switched over to just plain aggressive. “When I asked if you’d forgotten to tell me something, I was referring to how you’d forgotten to tell me you and Caro dated.”

“I didn’t tell you that?” The surprise in his voice sounded genuine, at least.

“No, you didn’t.”

“Oh. I thought I had.”

“It must have slipped your mind. It also must have slipped your mind to tell me that this dating lasted for a decade and a half.”

“A decade and a half? It couldn’t have been that long,” said Peter, braking for a red light. Then he thought about it for a moment. “Actually, maybe that is right. We met when I was eighteen, and we broke up when I was thirty-three. So it was a decade and a half, off and on. Wow-it sounds like a really long time when you put it like that, doesn’t it?”

“Especially when you’re hearing about it for the first time.”

“The first time? But I told you I’d dated people before. Wouldn’t it have been sort of weird if I hadn’t?”

“You told me you dated people. Not one person. And not for fifteen years.”

“You never seemed to have wanted details. In fact, you usually changed the subject when anything came up about people either of us have dated.”

“Well, now I want details,” I said, steeling myself. “I want the list.”

“The list?”

“Of women you’ve dated.” Perhaps there was more off than on in the “off and on” of his relationship with Caro. That would go a long way toward making me feel better. Many meaningless ex-girlfriends were infinitely preferable to a single meaningful one.

“It’s a pretty short list. There was my high-school girlfriend, Ashley, from the cross-country team. I wonder what ever happened to her?”

“I don’t think high school counts.”

“No high school? Okay, then scratch Ashley. After high school, there was Caro. And there were a few women I went out with once or twice when Caro and I were taking breaks. Do a couple of dates count?” His tone was distracted, and he was scanning the streets for a parking space as he spoke. “Mostly it was just Caro.”

“You told me you hadn’t dated anyone seriously.”

“I hadn’t,” he said. “I didn’t.”

“Fifteen years’ worth of not serious?” I asked, incredulous. “How can fifteen years not be serious?”

“It wasn’t like that.”

“Then how was it?”

“We just fell into it. You know how it is. We got along really well, and we liked to do a lot of the same things. It was almost the path of least resistance. I don’t think either of us ever intended for it to last as long as it did. It just sort of happened. Aha,” he said, pulling the Prius into a space on Fourth Street. “Perfect.”

“Fifteen years?” I repeated.

He shifted the car into Park and turned to face me. The sun had only recently set, but his chocolate-colored eyes looked black in the dusk. “Rachel. I promise you. It wasn’t serious. I would have told you if it was. You’re the only person I’ve ever been serious about.”

“Who broke up with who?” I asked. “Or whom?”

“Is that really important?”

“I’d like to know.”

He looked away, pushing the ignition button to turn off the car and unbuckling his seat belt. “Technically, I guess she broke up with me.”

This was most definitely not the answer I’d been hoping to hear.

It was past nine, and there were a few people scattered across the grass of the Esplanade, listening to a lone musician playing a saxophone, but otherwise the park was empty, and Luisa and Ben hadn’t yet arrived. We found the memorial easily, a waterfall of Sierra granite facing onto the Esplanade and lit by floodlights. Water gushed over its fifty-foot wall of rock to splash into a pool below, from which a cloud of mist rose into the cool night air. The waterfall was pretty, but we couldn’t see how it was particularly relevant, so we followed the walkway that led behind it to a series of glass panels displaying photographs of the assassinated civil-rights leader and excerpts from his writings and speeches.