«That can’t be helped.»
«Well, yes, of course you’re right about that. And we also have your other two goals to consider.» Win lowered the visor and checked his hair in the mirror. Not a blond hair out of place. He still patted about, frowning. When he finished, he snapped the visor back into place. «Let’s start with finding Anita Slaughter, shall we?»
Myron nodded, but he knew that he was not going to like where this was going.
«That is the core of the matter, is it not? Finding Brenda’s mother?»
«Right,» Myron said.
«So – and again let me make sure I comprehend completely – you are taking on police officers, the most powerful family in the state, and known mobsters to find a woman who ran off twenty years ago?»
«Yes.»
«And the reason for this search?»
«Brenda. She wants to know where her mother is. She has the right-»
«Bah,» Win interrupted.
«Bah?»
«What are you, the ACLU? What right? Brenda has no right here. Do you believe Anita Slaughter is being held against her will?»
«No.»
«Then what, pray tell, are you trying to accomplish here? If Anita Slaughter craved a reconciliation with her daughter, she would seek it. Clearly she has opted not to do that. We know that she ran away twenty years ago. We know that she has worked hard to stay hidden. What we don’t know, of course, is why. And instead of respecting her decision, you choose to ignore it.»
Myron said nothing.
«Under normal circumstances,» Win continued, «this search would be a close call. But when you add in the mitigating factors – the obvious danger upsetting these particular adversaries – the call is an easy one. Simply put, we are taking a tremendous risk for very little reason.»
Myron shook his head, but he saw the logic. Had he not wondered about these same issues himself? He was doing his tightrope act again, this time over a raging inferno, and he was dragging others, including Francine Neagly, with him. And for what? Win was right. He was pissing off powerful people. He might even be inadvertently helping those who wished Anita Slaughter great harm, flushing her out into the open where they could set their sights with greater ease. He knew that he had to step carefully here. One false move and ka-pow.
«There’s more to it,» Myron tried. «A crime may have been covered up.»
«Are you speaking now of Elizabeth Bradford?»
«Yes.»
Win frowned. «So is that what you’re after, Myron? You’re risking lives in order to give her justice after twenty years? Elizabeth Bradford is calling out to you from the grave or some such thing?»
«There’s also Horace to think about.»
«What about him?»
«He was my friend.»
«And you believe that finding his killer will ease your guilt over not talking to him in ten years?»
Myron swallowed at that one. «Low blow, Win.»
«No, my friend, I am merely trying to pull you back from the abyss. I am not saying that there is no value in what you are doing here. We have worked for questionable profit before. But you have to calculate some sort of cost-benefit analysis. You are trying to find a woman who does not want to be found. You are pushing against forces more powerful than you and me combined.»
«You almost sound afraid, Win.»
Win looked at him. «You know better.»
Myron looked at the blue eyes with the flecks of silver. He nodded. He did know better.
«I’m talking about pragmatism,» Win continued, «not fear. Pushing is fine. Forcing confrontation is fine. We’ve done that plenty of times before. We both know that I rarely back away from such instances, that I perhaps enjoy them too much. But there was always a goal. We were looking for Kathy to help clear a client. We were looking for Valerie’s killer for the same reason. We searched for Greg because you were well compensated monetarily. The same could be said about the Coldren boy. But the goal here is too hazy.»
The volume switch ori the car radio was set low, but Myron could still hear Seal «compare» his love to «a kiss from the rose on the grave». Romance.
«I have to stick with this,» Myron said. «For a little while longer anyway.»
Win said nothing.
«And I’d like your help.»
Still nothing.
«There were scholarships set up to help Brenda,» Myron said. «I think her mother may have been funneling money to her through them. Anonymously. I want you to try to track the money trail.»
Win reached forward and turned off the radio. Traffic was almost nonexistent. The air conditioner hummed, but otherwise the silence was heavy. After a couple of minutes, Win broke it.
«You’re in love with her, aren’t you?»
The question hit him by surprise. Myron opened his mouth, closed it. Win had never asked a question like this before; he did, in fact, all he could do to avoid the subject. Explaining love relationships to Win had always seemed akin to explaining jazz music to a lawn chair.
«I think I might be,» Myron said.
«It’s affecting your judgment,» Win said. «Emotion may be ruling over pragmatism.»
«I won’t let it.»
«Pretend you are not in love with her. Would you still pursue this?»
«Does it matter?»
Win nodded. He understood better than most. Hypo-theticals had nothing to do with reality. «Fine then,» he said. «Give me the information on the scholarships. I’ll see what I can find.»
They both settled into silence. Win as always looked perfectly relaxed and in a state of total readiness.
«There is a very fine line between relentless and stupid,» Win said. «Try to stay on the right side of it.»
24
The Sunday afternoon traffic remained light. The Lincoln Tunnel was a breeze. Win fiddled with the buttons on Myron’s new CD player, settling on a recently purchased compilation CD of AM seventies classics. They listened to the «The Night Chicago Died». Then «The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia». Nights, Myron surmised, were a dangerous time in the seventies. Then the theme song to the movie Billy Jack blasted its peace on earth message. Remember the Billy Jack movies? Win did. A little too well, in fact.
The final song was a classic seventies tearjerker called «Shannon». Shannon dies pretty early in the song. In a very high pitch, we are told that Shannon is gone, that she drifted out to sea. Sad. The song always moved Myron. Mother is heartbroken at the loss. Dad always seems tired now. Nothing is the same without Shannon.
«Did you know,» Win said, «that Shannon was a dog?»
«You’re kidding.»
Win shook his head. «If you listen closely to the chorus, you can tell.»
«I can only make out the part about Shannon being gone and drifting out to sea.»
«That is followed by the hopes that Shannon will find an island with a shady tree.»
«A shady tree?»
Win sang, «Just like the one in our backyard.»
«That doesn’t mean it’s a dog, Win. Maybe Shannon liked sitting under a tree. Maybe they had a hammock.»
«Perhaps,» Win said. «But there is one other subtle giveaway.»
«What’s that?»
«The CD liner notes say the song is about a dog.»
Win.
«Do you want me to drop you off at home?» Myron asked.
Win shook his head. «I have paperwork,» he said. «And I think it best if I stay close.»
Myron did not argue.
«You have the weapon?» Win asked.
«Yes.»
«Do you want another?»
«No.»
They parked at the Kinney lot and took the elevator up together. The high-rise was silent today, the ants all away from the hill. The effect was sort of eerie, like one of those end-of-the-earth apocalypse movies where everything is abandoned and ghostlike. The dinging of the elevator echoed in the still air like a thunderclap.
Myron got off at the twelfth floor. Despite its being Sunday, Big Cyndi was at her desk. As always, everything around Big Cyndi looked tiny, like that episode of The Twilight Zone where the house starts shrinking or like someone had jammed a large stuffed animal into Barbie’s pink Corvette. Big Cyndi was wearing a wig today that looked like something stolen from Carol Channing’s closet. Bad hair day, Myron supposed. She stood and smiled at him. Myron kept his eyes open and was surprised when he didn’t turn to stone.