And now, Otis was going to pay.

She inhaled deeply, bringing her fingers to her temples.

No, Miles wouldn’t go that far. Would he?

Maybe not now, but it would eat away at him as long as he believed Otis was guilty, and one day he might-

She shook her head, not wanting to think about that.

Still, she didn’t know what to do.

Nor had any answers come to her a few minutes later, when Miles showed up at her door.

“Hi,” Miles said simply.

Sarah stared at him as if in shock, unable to move her hand from the doorknob.

She felt herself tense, her thoughts veering in opposite directions.

Tell him now, just get it over with…

Wait until you’ve figured out what to say first…

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“Oh… yeah… um…,” she stammered. “Come in.” She stepped back, and Miles closed the door behind him. He hesitated for a moment before heading toward the window, where he pulled the curtains and scanned the road; then he made a circuit of the living room, obviously distracted. Stopping at the mantel, he absently adjusted a picture of Sarah and her family, angling it so it faced the living room. Sarah stood in the center of the room without moving. The whole thing felt surreal. All she could think as she watched him was that she knew who’d killed his wife. “Charlie came by this morning,” he said suddenly, and the sound of his voice brought her back. “He took the file I had on Missy.”

“I’m sorry.”

It sounded ridiculous, but it was the first and only thing that came to mind.

Miles didn’t seem to notice.

“He also told me that he’d have me arrested if I so much as look at Otis Timson.”

This time, Sarah didn’t respond. He’d come to vent; the defensive posture he held made that clear. Miles turned toward her.

“Can you believe that? All I did was arrest the guy who killed my wife and this is what happens.”

It took all the control she could summon to keep her composure.

“I’m sorry,” she said for the second time.

“So am I.” He shook his head. “I can’t look for Sims, I can’t look for evidence, I can’t do anything. I’m supposed to sit at home and wait for Charlie to handle everything.”

She cleared her throat, struggling for a way out. “Well… don’t you think that might be a good idea? For a little while, I mean?” she offered. “No, not really. Christ, I’m the only one who kept looking after the initial investigation dried up. I know more about this case than anyone.” No, Miles, you don’t.

“So what are you going to do?”

“I don’t know.”

“You’ll listen to Charlie, though, won’t you?”

Miles looked away, refusing to answer, and Sarah felt something drop in her stomach.

“Listen, Miles,” she said, “I know you don’t want to hear this, but I think Charlie’s right. Let other people handle Otis.”

“Why? So they can screw it up a second time?”

“They didn’t screw it up.”

His eyes flashed. “No? Then why is Otis still walking around? Why was it up to me to find the people who fingered him? Why didn’t they look harder for any evidence back then?”

“Maybe there wasn’t any,” she answered quietly.

“Why do you keep playing devil’s advocate about this?” he demanded. “You did the same damn thing yesterday.”

“No, I didn’t.”

“Yeah, you did. You didn’t listen to anything I said.”

“I didn’t want you to do anything-”

He held up his hands. “Yeah-I know. You and Charlie both. Neither one of you seems to realize what the hell is going on here.”

“Of course I do,” she said, trying to hide the tension in her voice. “You think Otis did it and you want revenge. But what happens if you find out later that Sims and Earl were wrong somehow?”

“Wrong?”

“With what they heard, I mean…”

“You think they’re lying about this? Both of them?”

“No. I’m just saying that maybe they heard it wrong. Maybe Otis said it, but he didn’t mean it. Maybe he didn’t do it.”

For a moment, Miles was too thunderstruck to speak. Sarah pressed on, talking over the lump in her throat.

“I mean, what if you find out that Otis is innocent? I know you two don’t get along-” “Don’t get along?” he said, cutting her off. He stared hard at her before taking a step toward her. “What the hell are you talking about? He killed my wife, Sarah.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Yes, I do,” he said. He moved even closer to her. “What I don’t know is why you’re so convinced that he’s innocent.”

She swallowed. “I’m not saying that he is. I’m just saying that you should let Charlie handle this so that you don’t do anything…”

“Like what? Kill him?”

Sarah didn’t answer and Miles stood before her. His voice was strangely calm.

“Like he killed my wife, you mean?”

She paled. “Don’t start talking like that. You’ve got Jonah to think about.”

“Don’t bring him into this.”

“It’s true, though. You’re all he’s got.”

“Don’t you think I know that? What do you think kept me from pulling the trigger in the first place? I had the chance but I didn’t do it, remember?” Miles exhaled sharply as he turned from her, almost as if he were disappointed that he hadn’t. “Yeah, I wanted to kill him. I think he deserves it for what he did-an eye for an eye, right?” He shook his head and looked up at her. “I just want him to pay. And he will. One way or another.”

With that, Miles abruptly walked to the door, slamming it as he left.

Chapter 32

Sarah couldn’t sleep that night.

She was going to lose her brother.

And she was going to lose Miles Ryan.

As she lay in bed, she was reminded of the evening she and Miles had first made love in this room. She remembered it all-the way he’d listened when she told him she couldn’t have children, his expression when he’d told her that he loved her, how they’d whispered together for hours afterward, and the peace she’d felt in his arms.

It had seemed so right, so perfect.

The hours after Miles had left produced no answers. If anything, she was more confused than she had been earlier; now that the shock had passed and she was able to think more clearly, she knew that no matter what decision she made, nothing would ever be the same again.

It was over.

If she didn’t tell Miles, how could she face him in the future? She couldn’t imagine Miles and Jonah in her home, sitting around the Christmas tree and opening gifts, she and Brian smiling, pretending that nothing had ever happened. She couldn’t imagine looking at Missy’s pictures in his house, or sitting with Jonah, knowing that Brian had killed his mother. Nor, of course, would it be the right thing to do. Not with Miles hell-bent on making sure that Otis paid for the crime. She had to tell him the truth, if for no other reason than to make sure that Otis Timson wasn’t punished for something he didn’t do. More than that, Miles had the right to know what really happened to his wife. He deserved that.

But if she did tell him, then what? Would Miles simply believe Brian’s story and let it go? No, not likely. Brian had broken the law, and once she told him, Brian would be arrested, her parents would be devastated, Miles would never speak to her again, and she would lose the man she loved. Sarah closed her eyes. She could live with never having met Miles.

But to fall in love with him and then lose him?

And what was going to happen to Brian?

She felt sick to her stomach.

She got out of bed, slid into a pair of slippers, and went to the living room, wanting desperately to find something, anything, to think about instead. But even there, she was reminded of all that had happened, and she knew with sudden certainty what she had to do. As painful as it was going to be, there was no other way around it.