«I'm glad to hear you say so,» said Alan.
«I look at it like this,» said the old man. «Please a customer with one article, and he will come back when he needs another. Even if it is more costly. He will save up for it, if necessary.»
«So,» said Alan, «you really do sell love potions?»
«If I did not sell love potions,» said the old man, reaching for another bottle, «I should not have mentioned the other matter to you. It is only when one is in a position to oblige that one can afford to be so confidential.»
«And these potions,» said Alan. «They are not just — just — er —»
«Oh, no,» said the old man. «Their effects are permanent, and extend far beyond the mere casual impulse. But they include it. Oh, yes, they include it. Bountifully. Insistently. Everlastingly.»
«Dear me!» said Alan, attempting a look of scientific detachment. «How very interesting!»
«But consider the spiritual side,» said the old man.
«I do, indeed,» said Alan.
«For indifference,» said the old man, «they substitute devotion. For scorn, adoration. Give one tiny measure of this to the young lady — its flavour is imperceptible in orange juice, soup, or cocktails — and however gay and giddy she is, she will change altogether. She'll want nothing but solitude, and you.»
«I can hardly believe it,» said Alan. «She is so fond of parties.»
«She will not like them any more,» said the old man. «She'll be afraid of the pretty girls you may meet.»
«She'll actually be jealous?» cried Alan in a rapture. «Of me?»
«Yes, she will want to be everything to you.»
«She is, already. Only she doesn't care about it.»
«She will, when she has taken this. She will care intensely. You'll be her sole interest in life.»
«Wonderful!» cried Alan.
«She'll want to know all you do,» said the old man. «All that has happened to you during the day. Every word of it. She'll want to know what you are thinking about, why you smile suddenly, why you are looking sad.»
«That is love!» cried Alan.
«Yes,» said the old man. «How carefully she'll look after you! She'll never allow you to be tired, to sit in a draught, to neglect your food. If you are an hour late, she'll be terrified. She'll think you are killed, or that some siren has caught you.»
«I can hardly imagine Diana like that!» cried Alan.
«You will not have to use your imagination,» said the old man. «And by the way, since there are always sirens, if by any chance you should, later on, slip a little, you need not worry. She will forgive you, in the end. She'll be terribly hurt, of course, but she'll forgive you — in the end.»
«That will not happen,» said Alan fervently.
«Of course not,» said the old man. «But, if it does, you need not worry. She'll never divorce you. Oh, no! And, of course, she herself will never give you the least grounds for — not divorce, of course — but even uneasiness.»
«And how much,» said Alan, «how much is this wonderful mixture?»
«It is not so dear,» said the old man, «as the spot remover, as I think we agreed to call it. No. That is five thousand dollars; never a penny less. One has to be older than you are, to indulge in that sort of thing. One has to save up for it.»
«But the love potion?» said Alan.
«Oh, that,» said the old man, opening the drawer in the kitchen table, and taking out a tiny, rather dirty-looking phial. «That is just a dollar.»
«I can't tell you how grateful I am,» said Alan, watching him fill it.
«I like to oblige,» said the old man. «Then customers come back, later in life, when they are rather better off, and want more expensive things. Here you are. You will find it very effective.»
«Thank you again,» said Alan. «Goodbye.»
«Au revoir,» said the old man.
Finis