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Too Robot To Marry

by George H Smith

Father Charles looked up in surprise as the two robots came up the walk to the parish house and rang the doorbell.

Robots were common enough these days even in little Bridgeton but he still hadn't recovered from the shock of seeing them approach the rectory when they were shown into his study by the housekeeper.

"Father, these," the woman indicated them with one hand, "are L53 and L W 456. They want to speak to you."

"Ah, yes. Come in my… Come in and sit down," Father Charles had never been quite this close to one of the eight foot giants who did much of mankind's menial work. They were rather awe inspiring. "Do you sit down?"

The larger of the two, the one who had the white letters L 53 on its chest, spoke in a queer rasping voice. "Thank you, Father, but we are not equipped for sitting. That is one reason why you don't see us at mass on Sundays."

"Mass? you? I mean… are you Catholic?"

"Our former owner, Father, was Reverend Piere Henri, S. J. We were raised in the faith."

Father Charles was shocked. "Do you mean that Father Henri allowed you to partake of the sacraments? But… you're…"

"While we were with Father Henri, we made our first communion and were confirmed. We have tried to live in the faith since his death."

"You have?" Father Charles ran his hand through his hair. "Well… what do you want here now?"

"Lia and I would like for you to marry us, Father."

"Marry you? Marry you? Do you know what you're saying?" the priest exploded. "You're machines! You have no souls!"

"We wish to be married. We love each other."

"You are asking me to commit sacrilege. You were created by man and man cannot create souls."

"Father Henri thought that in our case the soul may have come with the dawning of sentience," L 53 said.

"Father Henri had some pretty heretical ideas for a Jesuit," Father Charles said angrily. "Go on back to your owners and forget this ridiculous idea."

"But Father, let me explain. We feel that we really must get married." There was pleading in the mechanical voice and an almost woman-like sadness in the eyes of the other robot.

"I'm sorry but I won't discuss it any further," Father Charles said in a somewhat kinder tone. "It is contrary to the doctrines of the church."

"Father Henri…"

"Father Henri was a sentimental fool," Father Charles roared, losing patience again. "Now get out of here before…"

"You don't understand, Father. We have to…"

"Get out!"

It was almost three weeks later that Father Charles stood on the steps of the church after hearing confession and saw the two robots coming toward him. LW 456 was carrying a rather bulky bundle.

"We have come to confession. Father," L 53 announced. "Confession? You're mad!" Father Charles said.

"But we have sinned, Father… we have sinned." L 53's voice came as close to breaking as a robot's can.

"Sinned? What do you mean? How could you sin?"

"This is why we felt we had to marry, Father," LW 456 said uncovering the bundle she carried to display a small utility robot.

"Our new work is in the robot factory just outside of town and they set us to building this little one for work in the home. We were set by our owners to reproducing our species."

"We have conceived outside of marriage, Father, and so we have sinned," LW 456 said.

"Help us, Father," L 53 pleaded.

"Help me, Father," Father Charles said lifting his eyes upward.