"Thanks," I grumbled at the sky. "That's what I get for being heroic."
Chapter Sixteen
"Confession is good for the soul."
I descended as swiftly as I could to get under the shelter of the forest crown. In my mind I ran over the sequence of events. There was no way that explosion could have been triggered by accident. That grenade ring had a full-scale failsafe on it, not to mention a couple of safety catches to prevent it going off if Massha caught the bezel on something. I was reluctant to come to the obvious conclusion: that someone had set it off on purpose.
But why? If the inn had blown up, we would all have been killed.
Not necessarily, I reasoned, as I landed on the side of the road. At least four of my students were proficient at instantaneous transfer between one dimension and another. In the confusion while we were trying to get rid of the bomb, the guilty party could just have BAMFed out, leaving the rest of us to be blown to smithereens.
But who?
I didn't look forward to figuring that one out.
When I arrived back at the inn, shivering and soaking wet, I was greeted as the returning hero.
"You are amazing, Master Skeeve!" Jinetta exclaimed, gathering me up into a bone-crunching hug. "You saved us!"
"I was so frightened," Freezia admitted, hugging me in her turn and passing me along to Pologne. Bee merely stood to attention, his freckled face pale. Tolk ambled over and stuck his nose into my palm.
Melvine wasn't completely over his sulk, but he came forward and flicked his fingers at me. My clothes and hair dried instantly. "It's an Elemental School desert spell," he said. No apology, no gratitude, but I got the message.
"Thanks," I said. It did feel good to be dry again.
Massha enveloped me in folds of translucent orange silk.
"I'm sorry, Cupcake! I never dreamed the ring could go off like that."
"It didn't," I said shortly. I turned to my students. "Which one of you set that off? Maybe you thought it would be funny to have us running in circles."
"No, sir," Bee said, fervently.
"Did you do it?"
"No! No way, sir."
"I saw Pologne handling it last," Tolk said. "If you could get some of the pieces I could sniff them and tell you for sure."
"Tattletale!" Pologne snarled. "That's a lie."
"What about you, dogface? You had your nose in everything. It could have been you!" Freezia snapped.
"Me? How-how-how dare you?"
"Hold it. HOLD IT!" I shouted over the sudden pandemonium. "The only person I want to hear from right now is the one who set off the ring. I don't care if you thought it was a joke. I don't care if it was an accident. Just tell me."
Silence. The students all eyed one another with open distrust.
"All right," I said, shrugging my shoulders. "That's it, then. I've had enough. Lady Massha, thanks for coming. Do you want to take Bee back to Possiltum with you? I'm sure he can catch a wagon or something else going toward his home town."
"Sure, if that's what you want, boss-man."
"Thank you very much." I turned to the assembled student body. "The rest of you are on your own."
"What?!?" the students asked in outraged six-part harmony.
"It's over," I said simply. "Girls, I'll reimburse you the remainder of your tuition. Tolk, I will make it up to Chumley somehow. Same for you, Melvine. I'll explain to Markie if she wants to drop by. I'd appreciate it if everybody was out of here by sunset. I'm sorry to say it, but I can't teach any of you any longer. Somebody is playing dangerous games."
Jinetta's eyes went wide with panic. "You can't do that!"
"I certainly can," I said. "Someone just put us all in danger, and he or she won't admit it."
"Oh, please," she begged. "Don't send us away. We need you."
"That's right," Tolk said. "Come on, Skeeve. One little explosion."
"Little?" Bunny squeaked indignantly. "That could have taken out half the Bazaar."
"Master Skeeve, I wish you'd reconsider," Bee said. "I've learned more in a week and a half from you than from anyone I have ever known, except for Sergeant Swatter, of course. I don't know about my fellow students, but I bet we all feel the same."
The others nodded vigorously.
"I'm not responsible for your feelings," I said. "I just discovered that one of you is capable of playing a nasty trick on the rest, me included, and I have no intention of giving you a second chance at it."
"I didn't do it!" Melvine sniveled. "Aunt Markie will kill me if you send me home!"
"Skeeve, we really need your help. Don't send us away now," Freezia pleaded, twining her arms around one of mine and looking up at me with big, beseeching eyes. The effect of Pervish orbs of green-veined yellow was more frightening than wistful, but the emotion behind them was clear. "What about the rest of us? One of us might be a joker, but the other five are all very sincere students, and we are really enjoying our lessons. Honestly." My resolve wavered.
"Well—"
Pologne attached herself to my other arm. "I know we've been touchy. I mean, I know I have. I'll keep my temper better. You're right: we have so much to learn from each other. Please, be fair."
I sighed. She'd just hit me right where I live. I wanted to be fair, and punishing five for the sins of one was not. "All right. I'll give the bomber one chance. I'll be in my study until dinner. If he or she comes around and tells me the truth, I'll reconsider. No guarantees."
"We understand," Jinetta said, her head bowed. The group filed out of the room.
Massha clicked her tongue. "Well, my lesson sure went off with a bang. Don't worry, Skeeve," she added as I frowned. She held up her Cone of Silence amulet. "No one can hear past this."
"Thanks," I sighed, and slumped into a chair. "I'm sorry about the ring. I know you treasured it because it came from Hugh."
"I'll get over it," she said. "I've still got the man. Trinkets don't matter. He'll find me something else just as deadly."
"Why didn't you just send them all home?" Bunny asked, standing over me with her arms folded across her chest. "I told you something was up."
"This could just be an accident," I said. "Someone thought he or she would be funny, and it blew up—literally—in their face."
"Or it could be an attempt to kill someone in the group," Bunny said, eying me. "You're too trusting, especially when you're the most likely target."
"Me?"
"Well, who else? They're all too young to have made enemies. But you're the Great Skeeve! It's not like this is the first time a rival magician has decided to try and take out the opposition."
"Why me? I'm not even in the lineup right now. I'm out of the picture."
Bunny eyed me. "Just the perfect time to take a stab at you, if you'll pardon the expression. I told you this morning I was worried. I think you ought to go to Uncle Bruce and ask for a couple of his men to watch your back. I know Guido and Nunzio would jump at the chance to help you out. They miss working with you. Both of them have said you're the best boss they ever had. In fact, they'd do it out of friendship, no contract involved."
"No!" I said, jumping up. "I won't impose on friends. They have another job to do. Bunny, I appreciate your concern, but I don't need outside bodyguards. I've got Gleep."
My pet raised his head from where it rested on his stubby forearms.
"Gleep!" he announced, looking as brave as a baby dragon could.
"I've got you," I continued, "and my own wits."
"And me," Massha added. "There's no way old Massha's going to let you twist in the wind."
"Thank you, Massha, I appreciate it, but go ahead and go home. Fortunately, you only had one exploding ring. If this was a serious assassination attempt, the perpetrator would have had his or her own bomb. This looks more like a prank or a crime of opportunity. I can try and draw whoever it is out into the open."