Paula rolled her eyes and prayed for patience. She counted backwards from ten and then said:

‘We’re not breaking up. But we …’ She cast a glance at Johanna for support.

‘We just can’t live here any more,’ Johanna said.

‘You can’t live here?’ Rita looked at Leo as her eyes filled with tears. ‘But where are you going to move? How are you … and the boy …?’ Her voice broke and the words didn’t seem to want to come out in the right order.

‘You can’t move back to Stockholm. I hope you’re not even considering that,’ said Mellberg. ‘Leo can’t grow up in a big city like that. You understand that, don’t you? He might grow up to be a delinquent or a drug addict or something equally bad.’

Paula refrained from pointing out that both she and Johanna had grown up in Stockholm without suffering any damage. She realized that certain topics weren’t worth arguing over.

‘No, we’re not going to move back to Stockholm,’ Johanna hastened to say. ‘We’re happy here. But it might be hard to find a flat in the area, so we’re going to have to look in Grebbestad and Fjällbacka too. Of course the best thing would be if we could find one nearby. But at the same time …’

‘At the same time, we do need to move,’ said Paula. ‘You’ve both been incredibly helpful, and it has been fantastic for Leo, but we need to have our own place.’ She squeezed Johanna’s hand under the table. ‘So we’ll just have to take whatever we can find.’

‘But Leo needs to see his grandpa and grandma every day. That’s what he’s used to.’ Mellberg looked as if he wanted to pull the boy out of his high chair and hold him close, never to let him go.

‘We’ll do what we can, but we need to move as soon as possible. Then we’ll see what happens after that.’

Silence descended over the table, and only Leo was his usual cheerful self. Rita and Mellberg exchanged worried glances. The girls were going to move and take the boy with them. That might not be the end of the world, but it certainly felt like it.

It was impossible to forget the blood. The red colour had looked so garish against the white silk. She was filled with a terror that was worse than anything she’d ever felt. And yet the years she’d lived with Fredrik had been filled with frightening moments – episodes that even now she refused to think about, pushing them instead to the very back of her mind. Instead, she tried to focus on Sam and his love.

On that night she had stood there, frozen in place, staring at the blood. Then she had sprung into action, moving with a determination that she hadn’t known she possessed. Their suitcases were already packed. She was wearing her nightgown, and in spite of the fear she felt, she took the time to pull on a pair of jeans and a sweater. Sam could wear his pyjamas. She picked him up and carried him out to the car after loading everything else into the vehicle. He wasn’t asleep, but he didn’t say a word.

Everything had seemed so quiet. The only sound was a faint rumbling from the sparse nighttime traffic. She hadn’t dared think about what Sam might have seen, or how it had affected him, or what his silence meant. He usually loved to chatter, but he hadn’t said a word. Not one word.

Nathalie drew up her legs and wrapped her arms around her knees as she sat on the dock. She was surprised that she didn’t feel restless after two weeks on the island. But the days seemed to have raced by. She hadn’t yet decided what to do next, or what the future might hold for Sam and herself. Who knew if they even had a future? She had no way of knowing whether she and her son would be targeted by the people Fredrik was associated with, or whether they would be safe hiding out here. She would have preferred to withdraw from the world entirely and stay on Gråskär for ever. That was easy enough to do in the summertime, but when winter arrived, they wouldn’t be able to live here. And Sam needed friends and other people. Real people.

But he had to get well before she could make any decisions. Right now the sun was shining, and the sound of the sea lapping against the bare rocks lulled them to sleep at night. They were safe in the shadow of the lighthouse. Everything else could wait. And with time, the memory of the blood would fade.

‘How are you feeling, sweetheart?’ She felt Dan wrap his arms around her from behind, and she had to fight not to pull out of his embrace. She had emerged from the darkness and was able to see her children again, to spend time with them and feel the love she had for them. But she still felt dead inside whenever Dan touched her or gave her that entreating look.

‘I’m okay,’ she said, wriggling out of his arms. ‘Just a little tired, but I’ll try to stay up for a while. I need to retrain my muscles.’

‘Which muscles?’

She tried to smile at his joke, the way she always used to whenever he teased her. But she managed only a grimace.

‘Could you go and get the children?’ she asked him, wincing as she bent down to pick up a toy car lying on the kitchen floor.

‘Let me get that,’ said Dan, quickly reaching down to get the toy.

‘I could have done it,’ she snapped, immediately regretting her tone of voice when she saw his hurt expression. What was wrong with her? Why did she have this empty hole in her chest where all her feelings for Dan used to be?

‘I don’t want you to overdo it, that’s all.’ Dan stroked her cheek. His hand felt cold against her skin, and she forced herself not to push it away. Why was she reacting like this to him, when she knew that he loved her so much and he was the father of the child she had wanted so badly? Had her feelings for Dan vanished when their son took his last breath?

Anna suddenly felt overwhelmed with fatigue. She couldn’t bear to think about this right now. She wanted to be left alone so she could rest until the children came home and her heart would fill with the love she felt for them. A love that had survived.

‘Will you go and pick them up?’ she murmured, and Dan nodded. She didn’t dare look at him, because she knew that his eyes would be filled with pain. ‘I need to lie down and rest for a while.’ She turned away and slowly went upstairs.

‘I love you, Anna,’ he called after her.

She didn’t reply.

‘Hello?’ Madeleine called out as she came in the door.

The flat was abnormally quiet. Were the kids asleep? It wouldn’t be so strange if they were. They’d arrived late last night, and Kevin and Vilda had both gotten up early this morning, excited to be visiting their grandparents.

‘Mamma? Pappa?’ Madeleine said, lowering her voice. She took off her shoes and hung up her thin coat. For a moment she paused in front of the hall mirror. She didn’t want them to see that she’d been crying. They were worried enough as it was. But it was such a joy to see her parents. Last night, dressed for bed and looking bewildered, they had opened the door. Then the wary expression on their faces had given way to big smiles. It had felt so good to be home again, even though she knew that the sense of security she felt was both an illusion and only temporary.

Everything was chaos. Matte was dead, and she realized that deep in her heart she had been hoping and praying that somehow they would find a way to be together.

She stood in front of the mirror, tucked her hair behind her ear, and tried to see herself as Matte had seen her. He’d told her that she was beautiful. She couldn’t understand it, but she knew that he’d meant it. She could see it in his eyes every time he looked at her, and he’d had so many plans for what their future together could be. Even though she was the one who had made the decision to flee, she had still believed that one day his plans would be realized. Tears welled up in her eyes again. She looked up at the ceiling to prevent them from running down her cheeks. With an effort she blinked the tears away and took a deep breath. For the sake of her children, she needed to pull herself together and do what needed to be done. There was no time for grieving right now.