“What do you want, Taylor?” his deep voice asks flatly.

What do I want? That’s a loaded question. “I want the truth,” I snap.

He rolls his shoulders as if they’re tight. “Well, you’re not gonna get it.”

My mouth falls open. “Don’t you think I deserved that?” I demand.

His jaw tightens, and he starts to walk to me. “What about what I deserve?” he asks raising a dark eyebrow.

He can’t be serious. “What you deserve? What makes you think you deserve anything?” He did save your life, Taylor. Yeah, only to ruin it.

His jaw twitches, and he tightens his grip on the towel around his hips. “You have no idea what I did for you!” he yells. “You have no idea what it has cost me.”

“I cost you?” I ask in disbelief. “You took advantage of me.” You made me fall for you.

He cocks an eyebrow and leans down, placing his face in front of mine. “I took nothing from you that you didn’t willingly throw in my face,” he replies flatly. I gasp. “Oh, please. Don’t act so fucking innocent. We both know you’re not!”

I place my hands on my hips and just stare up at him because part of that is true. I willing gave him everything my body had to offer, and he used it and then broke it. “What did you give up?” I decide to ask. “What did I cost you? Because you don’t seem to be hurting,” I snap, choosing to be angry other than sad about what I did.

“I broke every rule I had for you,” he sneers.

I throw my head back and let out a laugh. A crazy, losing my mind laugh because that’s all I can do in this situation. Laugh at it.

His arms strongly grip my shoulders and it cuts off my laughing as I look up at him. “Laugh all you want, sweetheart.” His voice is hard. “But I had those rules for a reason. You wanna know what you did to me? You wanna know why I couldn’t tell you the truth? You wanna know why I continued to go on letting you think I was someone I wasn’t?” I swallow nervously. “Well, today is your lucky day because I’m gonna tell you. You made me feel like I was someone different. You made me feel like maybe, just maybe, I really wasn’t a person living a fucking lie. That maybe one day I could be the husband you wanted and give you the family you deserved.” My heart stops at his confession. “For once, I wasn’t confused about my life. I knew what I wanted, and I was getting it.” He sighs heavily. Removing one hand from my shoulders, he uses it to run down his still wet face. “I’ve felt dead for so long, Taylor,” his voice says softly. “You made me feel alive. You made me feel worth something. That fire you lit inside of me woke me up. You made me feel like I had a chance. A chance at living.” He releases my shoulders with his other hand, and he reaches up, softly wiping the single tear from my cheek. “I fell in love with you, Taylor. And you’re right, I took advantage of that opportunity. The feeling you gave me. If I had told you the truth, you would have left me. And I wasn’t willing to let you go.” I close my eyes. He loves me? When I open them, his blue eyes are searching my face. “And if I could, I would let you leave and walk out of my life right now. But I can’t. Tonight proves that me keeping you so close has put your life in danger. But once I know you’re safe, you’ll be free to go.” He pulls away from me and walks over to his closet.

I stand here, heart beating wildly and eyes glossy with tears, as he dresses. Once he’s done, he walks out of the closet and looks at me. His blue eyes search mine and he takes in a deep breath. “I truly am sorry for what I have done to you. But I promise if you just give me a few more days. I will fix it all and you never have to see me again.” With that, he walks out of his room and closes the door softly behind him.

My body shakes as a sob comes out. I fall down onto the bed and cry.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

 

CASE

I can hear her crying from the other side of my bedroom door. I hang my head as I place my hand over my racing heart. I told her everything I have felt for her, and I saw it in her eyes that she feels the same way. She wants to hate me but instead, it’s worse—she loves me.

I hear a sob and I turn to face the door. Placing my hand on the knob, I start to turn it but stop. This wasn’t supposed to be this hard. This wasn’t supposed to end like this. Hurting her. But I can’t walk away from what I know. My job. And she deserves more than a man who would put his job first. And this entire situation has proved I will place it before her.

I place my forehead on the door and release a heavy sigh. Why is it so hard? Why is it that the one thing I want most in this world is the one thing I have to let go?

“Case?”

I spin around when I hear a man say my name. I let out a ragged breath when I see Blane standing in the hallway with a terrified looking Savannah standing next to him. I look down to his hand holding hers, and I hate that I can’t do that for Taylor. That I can’t be the rock she needs.

“I didn’t hear you come in,” I say finally.

“We came right away,” he says, pulling her to his side.

“I need to talk to you. Privately.” I need to let him know I’m going to catch up on some sleep, but after I go to the hospital tomorrow, I won’t be returning to my house. Taylor needs me out of the picture, and she is safer here than anywhere else. As soon as I get the son of a bitch who tried to kill us all this morning, she’ll be able to go back home and live a normal life without me.

He looks down at Savannah, and she looks up at him. “I’m gonna go talk to Taylor,” she says softly. I know she’s still crying because we can all hear the soft cries coming from the door behind me.

“Okay.” He leans down and kisses her on the forehead. I look away and walk past them toward the kitchen. It may just be a little past eight in the morning, but all of a sudden, I feel the need for a stiff drink.

I reach up and grab a glass out of my cabinet. I then go over to the fridge and pull a bottle of bourbon out of it.

“Are we gonna talk about this?” I hear Blane ask as he enters the kitchen.

I close my eyes for a brief second and count to five to try and not throw this bottle at a wall. “Is there anyone who doesn’t want to talk?” I ask out loud. “I’m so fucking tired of having people want to talk about shit that doesn’t matter.”

“Hey!” he snaps. I open my eyes and turn around to face him. “That is my sister in there crying and she fucking matters.”

I look down at the empty glass in one hand and the bottle in the other. I slam the glass down on the countertop and decide to just tip back the bottle. I suck in a breath as it burns my throat. “Of course, she matters.” I sigh heavily. “That’s the problem.”

He looks around the kitchen as if confused and lost. “I don’t understand what happened. I don’t understand how you got to her.”

“How I got to her?” I question.

“Yes. How you managed to get her to believe all your lies,” he hisses. “Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to lie to her?” He shakes his head in confusion. “And she hated you.”

“I lie for a living,” I remind him. “And, well, she still does hate me.” I salute him with the bottle before I take another gulp.

“No. I mean she hated you. She thought you were this awful person.”

“Aren’t I?” Another drink.

He sighs heavily as he looks at the bottle in my hand and then up at me. “I may not agree with you sleeping with her, but we both know you saved her life tonight.” And the other night he doesn’t know about. “I know that no matter how far you two went, you had the best intentions at heart.”

I snort. “I wouldn’t be so sure,” I say honestly. “I don’t know what I was thinking.” I thought I could use her. I should have called off the entire operation with Blane the moment I found out the girl I wanted to fuck was his sister.