His hand moves over my thigh, squeezes it. “I just hope one day you can forgive me. Not now and maybe not even soon, but one day.”

He looks up at me. I gasp and reach out to touch his face, but then I pull back for fear of causing him more pain. It looks like he’s had enough of it tonight. His face reminds me of what Sundown’s looked like when I first saw her in the back of the SUV. Beaten and swollen.

“What did you do?”

He licks as the cut on his lip and hisses. Then brings a knuckle to the split there and shrugs. “Someone had to pay. Me, Taz, doesn’t matter. Just not you.”

“Taz did that to you?”

He stands, sweeps my bangs away, and leans over and kisses my forehead. “No, Dozer. After I beat the shit out of Taz, Dozer was more than happy to do the same to me.”

For the first time since facing off against Warner, I get angry. I glare up at him and when I do, a smirk tries to split across Mav’s face. Only it ends rapidly with him cursing and touching the back of his hand across his cut lip again.

“Fuck, that hurts. Why are you glaring at me?” The side of his mouth curls.

“No one else needs to get hurt. Do you understand? It’s done.”

“Except for Davis when I find him.”

I try to keep glaring at him, but he has a good point. Finally, I nod once. “Except for Davis.”

He smiles again, and says, “Fuck. Stop making me smile.”

I smile, and then laugh when my response only puts him in more pain, and makes him sound like the biker he is.

Locking eyes with me, he says with all sincerity, “It’s good to see your eyes again, and see you smile.” Then he cups my face and rubs his thumb over my cheek. “I missed you, Doll. Don’t ever go away like that again, okay?”

I nod.

Mav attempts to fight off his grin. He turns and strides to the couch that he’s used for the last two weeks as a bed.

“So I just have one question.”

He throws the pillow down on one side of the couch. He twists to look at me. “What’s that?”

“You said Lil’ would give me food poisoning in a week. But does that mean you hired a nurse and a cook?”

“No, just a nurse.” He picks up the blanket, then pauses with it in his hands, turns and shakes his head. “I know what you’re getting at. You and that smart-ass mouth of yours.”

Biting my lip, I raise an eyebrow.

He turns back around and shakes his blanket over the couch. He grumbles something that I don’t catch.

“What was that?”

“I’ve been watchin’ some cookin’ shows, and I bought a couple of books.”

Though it feels wrong to feel happy right now, I can’t contain my amusement and curiosity. “Books? On what?”

He takes his cut off and lays it nicely folded in half over a chair. He sits down and starts to take off his boots. Shrugging, he replies, “Cookin’, kids, how to take care of an invalid.”

“Ha. Ha. Ha. Very funny.”

He smiles then hisses, “Fuck. Would you stop?”

He exhales a deep breath and rubs his hands against his head. He stares at me for a long time before he finally lies down. His arms go behind his head and he looks at the ceiling. He crosses his legs at the foot of the couch.

I smile and push the button to lower me back down. “Good night, Mav.”

It seems like forever before he says, “Night, Doll.” Something he’s done every night without fail these last two weeks.

For a long time, all I can do is think of him, and listen to his breathing, even after it becomes deep with sleep. For the first time when I close my eyes, horrific images don’t consume my thoughts, and no nightmares take over my dreams.

Certain people are a part of our lives because that is exactly where God wants them to be.

MAVERICK

In anticipation of Ember and Will coming to live with me, I moved my bed from the master bedroom into one of the spare bedrooms, and I set up two new adjustable twin beds side by side in the master. Ember, and most likely Will, will be spending a lot of time in there and in bed, so I bought an entertainment center, a new 42 inch TV, and everything I could think of to help them pass the time in comfort.

I didn’t really know how to approach getting to know Will. So far, she’s treated me like Ember did. She knew I was there when she visited the hospital nearly every day. But besides a few wary glances here and there, she ignored my presence too.

Bethany told me to take it slow with her and to not overwhelm her. Will was already having a hard time, and what she really needed right now was to feel safe and have some stability. She also said her and Ember would need time alone together and time to heal. She warned me it would be natural for Will not to want to sleep alone in a strange house.

I kept everything she said in mind over the next few months.

The first month that we all lived together was a true test of whether Ember, Will, and I could survive in one house long term.

Going into it, I definitely didn’t realize all that I signed up for, and I don’t think Ember realized how much she would have to depend on me. Will simply clung to the person she trusted the most and followed Ember’s lead.

It was an eye opening experience for us all; although, it also felt like some kind of science experiment.

We had a few fires and visits from the fire department, my fault—two floods and a broken Blu-ray player, Will’s—and Ember had a couple of meltdowns from being confined to a bed. She reinjured herself twice thinking she could move around and shower without needing help.

As far as education went, I learned lots over those first four weeks. I learned about SpongeBob and the Backyardigans. I learned about bath time and that on the second read through of a book, Will usually fell asleep. I also learned five-year-olds need to be entertained every hour they’re awake, and when you promise you’ll do something, they will hold you to it. I learned that both of them loved music; music that sometimes hurt my ears to listen to. I learned that half of my vocabulary earned me a glare from Ember, which always made me hard so I slipped up on purpose here and there. I learned clutter and living in a mess drove Ember a little crazy, and she hated being helpless. I learned that the only cure for nightmares was to be held by someone you felt safe with, Ember for Will, and me for Ember. I learned they both had certain moods, that once identified, I needed to stay clear. I learned Ember hates tuna fish and pickles, and Will hates about eighty percent of all vegetables, which I guess is common for kids her age, and she despises spaghetti. She even has a song she sings about how she hates “pahsgetti” and she’s not going to eat it.

The first time she sang it and pushed her plate away, Ember laughed like I’d never heard her laugh before, full out and with a blindingly beautiful smile. I realized pretty quick that she wasn’t laughing because of the song; after all, she’d heard it before. She was laughing at my frozen what-in-the-ever-lovin’-fuck expression.

In month two of living together, I saw more of her smiles, Will’s too, and heard more of their laughs. We fell into a routine. I woke early and worked, and when Will woke, she snuck into my office and stole some papers and supplies. We took a break a little later and ate cereal, because Ember no longer trusted me to cook while she slept. Then we got back to work. When Will was in a listening mood, I taught her about art. When she wasn’t, we worked together in silence. After she finished a drawing, she would show it to me, get her due praise, and then put her hand over her lips, letting me know that I was again sworn to secrecy. Then she’d slide it into the cardboard tube I’d given her to keep them all safe.

At ten, we woke Ember and she got them both ready for the day. Then Will watched cartoons and Ember studied for her GED. She was almost back to her old self except that she moved cautiously, and couldn’t lift anything heavy.